


from dusk till dawn

by movingforthesakeofmotion



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: F/F, addiction trigger warning, also this is slowburn af, and gory AF as well, it's a vampire AU what did you expect?!, it's also probably gonna be psychologically dark and it's just...it's gonna be dark guys, this is gonna be dark af
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-19
Updated: 2017-01-23
Packaged: 2018-08-31 21:23:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 12
Words: 40,674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8594311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/movingforthesakeofmotion/pseuds/movingforthesakeofmotion
Summary: Erin Gilbert has always prided herself in being someone who was rational when it came to beliefs. She never forced her belief in Ghosts and the Other Side on other people, and never questioned anyone who believed in a ‘Higher Power’ or a ‘God’ or turned to their faith or religion in times of desperation or need. Erin knows what it’s like to believe in something so deeply and so passionately, you’d never question it, no matter what happened.Erin’s not afraid to admit, however, that she’s quite content with her belief extending that far. She doesn’t believe in God, she believes in Science. She believes in Ghosts. She believes in the Other Side.That’s it. Nothing more, nothing less. She’s never had her limits pushed beyond that, and Erin’s quite grateful for it. After all, a person can only take so much before they begin to question their entire existence.Everyone has their limits, though. Erin's about to hit hers.AKA, the Vampire AU.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I know, I got two more fics I'm supposed to finish, I will finish them, I promise! I've just had this idea in my mind for ages and I really need to write it! It's gonna go really deep into lore here, and it's gonna be dark, so just a heads up from now guys. Hope you enjoy it, please leave your comments, they always brighten my day!

Erin Gilbert has always prided herself in being someone who was rational when it came to beliefs. She never forced her belief in Ghosts and the Other Side on other people, and never questioned anyone who believed in a ‘Higher Power’ or a ‘God’ or turned to their faith or religion in times of desperation or need.

Erin knows what it’s like to believe in something so deeply and so passionately, you’d never question it, no matter what happened.

Faith and religion has never been high up on Erin’s things to question when it came to life, and Erin has always believed that the world held way more than just humans struggling day to day to make money and pay bills and survive. Seeing a Ghost at the foot of your bed every day for a year when you’re a child will do that to you.

Erin’s not afraid to admit, however, that she’s quite content with her belief extending that far. She doesn’t believe in God, she believes in Science. She believes in Ghosts. She believes in the Other Side. That’s what will happen when you save the entire city of New York from an outbreak of Ghosts and actually enter a vortex into the Other Side to save your best friend. 

That’s it. Nothing more, nothing less. She’s never had her limits pushed beyond that, and Erin’s quite grateful for it. After all, a person can only take so much before they begin to question their entire existence.

So when Erin passes a young man on the street, who looks at her with crazed eyes and shoves a flyer into her face, screaming about the upcoming apocalypse at that the ‘Ghosts were just the beginning of God’s wrath’, Erin takes the flyer without a word and simply quickens her pace, avoiding eye contact as he shouts at her until she disappears around the corner. 

She’s about a block away from the Firehouse, her mind racing with these thoughts that if Rowan’s diabolical plan and epic fail were all a part of ‘God’s plan’, then she’d have to thank him the next time she decided to visit home. After all, her mother refused to let her leave and head back home without at least one visit to the Church.

Maybe that’s where her despise for everything religious came from. Her mother ignoring her comments about Science, her belief in the Big Bang, and deciding that any daughter who would dismiss God and ramble about Ghosts was not worthy of being her daughter. 

Erin was pretty sure the final straw her been her coming out as Bisexual. After that, her mother ceased all contact with her. Erin had been expecting a call or something from her since the whole incident in New York, but it’s been two months. Still nothing.

Erin doesn’t mind. She’s perfectly content with the family she has now.

Erin fumbles with the keys in her pockets, holds a hand up and waves it haphazardly when she hears someone shout out ‘Ghostbusters, we love you!’ and enters the Firehouse before shutting the door behind her. 

“Finally! Been waiting for you all morning!” Abby Yates makes her way over to her best friend with a grin, a wad of envelopes in her hands as Erin shrugs her coat off and hangs it up on the wall next to their lockers that hold their jumpsuits. 

“Did I miss something?”

“Yeah, a bunch of fan mail! Most of it is from young girls, but look at this! Letters from Australia, Kenya, Russia! It’s insane!” Abby is holding the letters in her hands like an over excited child hyped up on sugar as she grins, and Erin can’t help but chuckle. 

“Guess we made an impact, huh?”

“We sure did! This is so amazing, Erin!” Erin grins at the sight of her best friend giddy with excitement as she takes a few of the envelopes from Abby’s hand and reads the writing on the top of each of them, a majority of them saying ‘To the Ghostbusters!’ or something of that caliber. 

They make their way past reception, past Kevin, who pops his gum with a loud snap and grins at Erin and Abby, who simply wave at him. They enter the main lobby area of the first floor, which is occupied with the kitchen, where Patty and Holtzmann are eating breakfast, both of them also going through stacks and stacks of envelopes on the table. 

“Wow, I wasn’t expecting so much fan mail.” Erin says, her eyes widening in surprise, and Holtzmann grins up at her with a mouthful of food.

“It’s great, isn’t it?” She mumbles. Erin takes a seat beside her as she opens the envelopes in her hand. 

“Guys, come on, we eat here, and I don’t wanna get this stuff dirty!” Abby says, waving her hands in front of the letters protectively, and Erin chuckles and stands, nodding.

“Alright, I’ll take a stack of them upstairs to my office and read them there, okay?”

“Yes, thank you!” Abby huffs, grabbing a letter from Holtzmann, who pouts as she takes another bite of her muffin.

“Come on, Holtzy, you don’t wanna go angering Abby now, she might go throwing you out another window.” Patty says, grinning, and Erin watches as Abby turns bright red.

“I was possessed!” She whines. Erin rolls her eyes, leaves her three best friends to their playful arguing, and takes a stack of letters into her hands. She makes her way up the stairs to her office, which she now shares with Holtzmann, whose lab took up a majority of the second floor. 

Erin doesn’t mind. She’s never needed a big office, and watching Holtzmann gallop around and work on her inventions is entertaining to her. 

She sits down at her desk, makes herself comfortable as she opens the first letter.

The envelope has small multicolored stars inside it, which fall when she pulls the paper out, and a smile tugs on her lips as she reads.

_Hello,_

_My name is Olya, I am five and I am from Russia! I just wanted to say that you are all my heroes and I appreciate very much what you do! I am sorry if this letter does not make much sense, my English is not very good!_

Erin chuckles, continues reading, and decides that when she’s done with this stack, she’s going to reply to each one. She opens the next one, reads it, opens the next, reads it...

“Gilbert.”

Erin wakes with a start, her back protesting as she sits up straight with a groan, the sound of gas being released from her joints echoing around her, and she blinks rapidly before looking up to see Holtzmann smiling down at her softly.

“We got called in for a bust. Sorry for waking you.” Erin’s eyes widen as Holtzmann leans in and removes a piece of paper from Erin’s face, and she looks down to see the stack of fan mail scattered around her, and a reply to the first letter in front of her. 

“How long have I been asleep?” Erin says in shock. Holtzmann chuckles.

“Not sure, I haven’t been up here all day.”

“All day? What time is it?” Erin stands, shock coursing through her as Holtzmann shrugs.

“I think it’s 1.”

“1? Oh my god!” Erin wrings her hands and Holtzmann grips her shoulders.

“Erin, calm down. Everyone falls asleep on the job. I know I do. Did you get any sleep last night?” Erin bites her lip. She hadn’t. Nightmares of the vortex and what had happened that day in New York had prevented her from getting a proper night’s sleep, as it had been for the last two months, and Holtzmann sighs.

“Seriously. Don’t get so upset. Just wake yourself up so we can go bust this Ghost, yeah?” 

“Yeah, course. Let’s go.” She grips Holtzmann’s forearm, and Holtzmann gives her a gentle squeeze and a smile before she makes her way back down the stairs, Erin following her as she rubs the sleep from her eyes. As soon as she reaches the second floor, she finds Abby and Patty already at their lockers, putting their jumpsuits.

“Come on, time’s a wasting!” She says with a grin, and Erin can’t help but smile at the excited glint in her best friend’s eyes.

Things had been a bit slow for the Ghostbusters since they’d past the stage of simply being the joke of the city to the actual heroes of New York, with a majority of the calls coming in being prank calls or people asking if they could meet them in person to thank them. Erin’s pretty sure they’ve only been on about three legitimate busts since the New York fiasco two months ago, and she has a feeling this one will end up joining the list of duds, but the look in Abby’s eyes is enough for her to throw her jumpsuit on in haste. 

Kevin makes his way over to them, munching on an apple as he grins.

“Good luck you guys! Not that you need it! You know, we should come up with a theme for you guys!” He says excitedly.

“A theme?” Patty says, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah, you know, like a theme song! I mean, they’ve got it for all those other superhero groups!” He says, pumping his fists excitedly. 

“We’re not superheroes, Kevin.” Erin says, rolling her eyes.

“I, for one, share your optimism, what would the theme song sound like, Kev?” Holtzmann asks, leaning in to him. He clears his throat and begins humming a tune, and Holtzmann begins bopping her head along to the beat as she zips up her jumpsuit and to everyone’s surprise, she starts singing. 

“If there’s something strange, in your neighborhood-.” 

“Enough goofing around, come on! We got a Ghost to catch!” Abby interrupts, and Holtzmann sighs before looking at Kevin with a wink.

“We’ll continue that when we get back, Kev.” He grins.

“You got it, boss!” They make their way to the Ecto-1, Holtzmann opening the door to the garage and heading straight for the driver’s seat, and Erin lets out a groan.

She loves Holtzmann, truly. All four of them had become incredibly close since beginning this job and Erin can say without hesitation that Holtzmann's is one of the most brilliant minds she’s ever met. She’d helped Erin solve a number of equations that had been bothering her for years, and their friendship had grown exponentially now that they shared the second floor of the firehouse.

But Holtzmann’s driving was erratic and downright terrifying.

“Try and keep it below 60 miles an hour, please?” Erin pleads. Holtzmann gives her a two fingered salute.

“I’ll do my best, but you know me, Gilbert. I got a need. A need for speed!” Erin rolls her eyes as she jumps into the passenger seat. As soon as everyone’s inside, Holtzmann clears her throat.

“All buckled up?” She calls out. They all sigh.

“Yes, Holtzmann.” They drone.

“Time to boogie!” She slams her hand down on the button that opens the garage before turning the car on, and Erin grips the handle above her door as she shoves the handbrake down, changes gears, and slams her foot down on the accelerator.

Holtzmann doesn’t even try.

Erin’s clutching her stomach, her heart racing as Holtzmann turns sharply, the sirens of the Ecto-1 blaring as people cheer loudly when they see them pass. She slams her foot on the accelerator and Erin’s eyes almost bulge out of her head when Holtzmann takes her hands off the wheel and pokes her head out of the window, cheering back at the people.

“Holtzmann!” Erin throws herself across the passenger seat and grabs the wheel, straightening the car out with white knuckles as Holtzmann pulls back into the car.

“I got it!” Erin glares at her, and she simply replies with a grin as she makes another turn. They drive for another ten minutes, Erin attempting to keep her breakfast down the entire time, before they arrive at what looks like a Nightclub. It’s daylight, so the lights aren’t on, but the building is purple and black and there’s a neon sign of a drink with the word “cocktails” underneath it.

“What? This is who called us?” Erin says, looking back at Abby in shock, who nods with an excited grin.

“Yup! A Ghost haunting a nightclub, it’s so weird, huh? Let’s go!” Erin sighs, but gets out of the car nonetheless as Holtzmann pops the boot open. They quickly grab their Proton Packs and make their way inside the Club, Abby pushing the door open. They see a woman at the front counter immediately look up at them, and she rushes toward them with look of relief on her face, her heels clacking on the tiled floor and echoing around them as they come to a stop. 

“Hey! Ghostbusters, right? Obviously! My name is Ellie, I own this place.” She shakes each of their hands, and Abby smiles.

“You’re the one who called, right?”

“Yeah, I did, um...I don’t know how to explain this, it’s so strange, but, uh…okay, look there’s been some complaints from customers lately.”

“Complaints?” Erin says, raising an eyebrow. Ellie bites her lip and sighs, running a hand through her long brown hair.

“A few weeks ago, I received a complaint from a woman who claimed that she saw a pearly white figure in the ladies bathroom and that it…well, it bit her.”

“It…what?” Abby and Erin exchange looks of shock and Ellie groans.

“I know, it sounds ridiculous, and I didn’t even believe her at first, she was so drunk, but then I had a similar complaint earlier this week and I thought it to myself, hearing it twice from two different people who don’t even know each other means it’s gotta be true, right? So I figured you guys could help solve this little issue, you know? I mean, pearly white figure? It’s gotta be a ghost, right?” She looks between all four Ghostbusters and Abby sighs, and Erin knows it’s because she’s beginning to think the same thing Erin’s thinking: this is another dud bust.

“It might be, yeah. Has anyone else seen it?”

“No, but those two women who made the complaints were regulars and they haven’t been back since. I can’t keep losing customers, this place is failing as it is-.”

“Alright, don’t worry, we’ll at least scope the place out and have a look.” Abby says, touching Ellie’s shoulder sympathetically. Erin sighs. They’re here, they might as well do something. 

“Thank you.” Ellie hugs Abby tearfully, and Holtzmann’s the one to clear her throat and take the lead as she makes her way into the main foyer of the Club, pulling out the P.K.E meter from her bag as she does. It slowly begins turning when Holtzmann turns it on, and they all follow her as she leads the charge.

Erin finds it a bit strange as she walks around to see a dancefloor and a bar with all the house lights on, and it throws her off a little as she tightens digs her nails into her palms, trying her best to remember that she’s here to do a job, even if it is a waste of time.

“You said the bathroom, right?” Patty asks, looking back at Ellie, who nods as she trails behind them. 

“Yeah.”

“Yo, after we bust this ghost, we should come here. This place looks pretty good.” Patty says, looking around with a grin.

“Yeah, maybe we could help bring some clientele back to this place.” Holtzmann says, throwing a wink at Ellie, and Erin rolls her eyes when she sees Ellie blush deeply. 

_She can’t stop flirting, not even for a second, unbelievable..._

“That would be amazing!” Ellie says breathlessly.

“Holtzmann. Bathroom.” Erin says through gritted teeth, wanting to finish this already so they can get back to the Firehouse and she can get back to work.

“Hold your ponies.” Holtzmann adjusts her proton pack before walking away from the dancefloor and toward the couches in the far right corner, where there’s two doors, one with a male sign and a female sign. She opens the door to the female bathroom and as soon as she enters it, the P.K.E meter begins spinning wildly. Erin stares at it in shock and Abby grips her bicep tightly.

“Definitely a Ghost.” Abby hisses in her ear, and Erin nods numbly before licking her lips and reaching behind her to grab her Proton Gun. Holtzmann looks back at her group before she opens the second door and enters the bathroom.

“Girl, you better stay out here.” Patty says, holding an arm out to stop Ellie from following them in. She looks at them in shock before she nods.

“Oh, o-okay.” Ellie slumps in defeat, and Erin turns back just in time to see Holtzmann suddenly freeze as the P.K.E meter begins making a loud whistling noise.

“Uh, guys?” Erin rushes forward until she’s right beside her and follows Holtzmann’s gaze.

Erin’s seen enough Ghosts in her life now to know that the one floating before them is a Distinct Class 5 Ghost, a near corporeal spirit in front of them, it’s back turned to the Ghostbusters after it and Erin finds herself examining its clothing. A dress, old style, almost Victorian, and she hears Patty come to a stop behind her, and Erin looks at her expectantly to see she’s looking at the Ghost in shock.

“Oh man, now that’s something you don’t see every day.” She whispers.

“What do you mean?” Erin whispers back. Patty lets out a breath.

“That looks old school, man. This Ghost has gotta be old, like really old. I’m talking late 1400’s, at least.” Erin looks at Patty in shock.

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah! That dress...it looks like the ones they used to wear in Florence.”

“Wait, Florence? You mean Italy?” Erin hisses.

“Uh huh.”

“What the hell is a Ghost from Italy doing in New York?” Holtzmann says, not taking her eyes off the Ghost. 

“It doesn’t matter! It’s putting people in danger which means it’s gotta go! Let’s get it back to the lab, ASAP!” Abby says, and Erin shakes her head to put herself back into focus as Holtzmann puts the P.K.E meter away and looks at Erin.

“On three?” She whispers. Abby and Patty push themselves up against the toilet stalls and Holtzmann looks at them and repeats herself silently. The girls nod, and Erin’s grip on her proton gun tightens.

Holtzmann holds one finger up-

The Ghost turns, shrieking loudly, and Erin barely gets a look at its face before she feels herself being thrown against the wall. The back of her head makes contact with the tiles and she collapses to the ground, her mind spinning and her vision blurring from the tears of pain that flood her eyes. She hears more shouting, the sound of a proton gun firing, and she pushes herself up and looks around, blinking rapidly in an attempt to get everything into focus.

Water begins spraying everywhere and Erin looks up with a groan of pain and sees Holtzmann has been thrown down onto a sink, breaking it completely as she crumples to the ground, her face contorted in pain.

“Holtz!” Erin begins to crawl forward before she feels something slam into her and she hits the wall once again, the breath getting knocked out of her as she coughs, the pressure in her lungs causing them to burn.

“Abby, watch out!”

More screams. The sound of things cracking and breaking. Erin’s blinks as something wet falls on her eyelids and it doesn’t hit her that it’s blood until she sees the crimson flow fall before her eyes onto the ground. She reaches up and touches the wound, hissing in pain before the adrenaline really kicks in and she stands, all pain ignored as she grabs her proton gun and fires wildly.

The Ghost dodges it and pushes Patty into one of the toilet stalls, breaking the door as Patty falls against the toilet. Abby is nowhere to be seen, and Holtzmann is beginning to get up, her hair a wild mess as it falls out of its usual hairstyle and tumbles down around her shoulders when the Ghost surges at Erin and throws her back before rushing toward Holtzmann.

Erin’s back hits the wall once more and she a whimper of pain escapes her, but she adjusts herself and looks up to see the Ghost holding Holtzmann up in the air by her throat before it suddenly opens its mouth and leans in toward Holtzmann’s neck.

Erin can’t see what’s happening, Holtzmann’s hair covering what the Ghost is doing, but Erin sees Holtzmann’s eyes widen before she suddenly screams, and that’s all the motivation Erin needs to jam her finger down onto the trigger of her Proton Gun. A Proton Stream explodes from her gun and wraps around the Ghost, and the Ghost growls and drops Holtzmann, who collapses to the ground in a heap. The Ghost makes its way toward Erin before it suddenly surges forward and disappears right before her eyes.

Erin lets go of the trigger, looking around wildly for where the Ghost went, her mind racing. How the hell did it escape out of the Proton Stream?

“Erin?” She looks up to see Abby pulling herself out of the wreckage of one of the stalls, and Patty pushes the door of the bathroom stall she was thrown through out of the way as she looks at Erin and Abby, who both look down at Holtzmann, who is still on the ground, a pool of blood surrounding her and her hair covering her face from view.

“Holtzmann!” Erin rushes forward and collapses to her knees as she pulls Holtzmann up into her lap. There’s blood all over her neck, her face stark white as she groans, eyelids fluttering as the blood stains her blonde hair and Erin swallows dryly and looks up at Abby.

“What the hell was that thing?” She croaks out. Before Abby can reply, Ellie bursts through the bathroom door and looks at the four ghostbusters crumpled on the ground in shock. 

“Oh my god!”

“Call an ambulance!” Erin says hoarsely. She simply nods and rushes out of the bathroom and Erin tries to find the source of Holtzmann’s bleeding, her fingers moving over the crimson covered porcelain skin of Holtzmann’s neck to find it.

“Holtz? Can you hear me?” The young engineer simply groans, and Erin blinks back tears as she runs her fingers through Holtzmann’s hair.

“It’s okay, the ambulance is almost here...it’s okay.”

**************************************************************

“And in a shocking turn of events, the heroes of New York City, otherwise known as the Ghostbusters, were rushed to the hospital with severe injuries this afternoon, after a bust gone wrong-.”

Erin shuts the TV off in frustration, wincing as the movement causes her shoulder to flare with pain as she lays back against her hospital bed with a sigh, nails scratching at her neck as she fingers the cotton of the sling hanging around her left arm.

A dislocated shoulder and a cut on her head that required ten stitches. All in all, Erin feels she escaped mostly unscathed. 

She looks up as the Doctor enters her room, and before he even reaches her bed, she’s hounding him with questions.

“How is Holtzmann? And Abby and Patty? Is everyone okay-?” The Doctor raises a hand to silence her and Erin closes her mouth shut as he chuckles.

“Miss Gilbert, everyone is fine. Miss Yates suffered a mild concussion and Miss Tolan had a few lacerations that we managed to stitch up. Your friends are fine.” Erin’s heart drops.

“Holtzmann?” The Doctor frowns.

“Well, Miss Holtzmann came to us covered in blood which we identified as her own, but we can’t seem to find any wounds on her body. It seems she’s perfectly fine.” 

“Then why do you look concerned?” Erin asks hollowly, observing the Doctor’s frown. He sighs. 

“Like I said, she came in here covered in her own blood with no wounds whatsoever. It’s strange.” Erin swallows the lump in her throat and nods.

“Can I see her?”

“Of course, she’s with Miss Yates and Miss Tolan in Room 208. I’ll bring you your discharge papers as well. All of you are free to go.” She nods once more and slowly sits up, adjusting her arm in her sling before moving off the bed. The Doctor makes his way out and Erin follows him into the hallway. She turns right, eyes scanning the Room numbers on the wall before she finds 208, and knocks on the door softly.

“Come in.”

She opens the door and walks in, closing the door gently behind her and is almost knocked through the door by Abby, who hugs her by the waist tightly.

“We were just about to come and see you.” She says, and Erin nods.

“It’s okay. I’m okay.” She pulls away, and Erin sees Abby is crying as she sniffs and wipes her cheeks. Erin turns to see Patty seated next to Holtzmann, and her breath catches at the sight before her.

Holtzmann has always seemed so goddamn invincible to her, but here she is, lying on a hospital bed, her jumpsuit covered in blood and her face stark white as she looks up at Erin and smiles lazily. 

“Hey, Gilbert. How are you feeling?” Erin makes her way over to them, and Abby follows her.

“We were worried.” Patty says, and Erin shakes her head.

“I’m fine, guys. How are you?” Erin asks Holtzmann. She shrugs.

“I’m okay. Feel a little like death, but okay.” Erin frowns, but the sound of a door behind them opening stops her and they turn to see the Doctor suddenly make his way into the room, holding four clipboards with forms on them.

“Here you go, ladies. Your discharge papers. If any of you feel any pain of any kind, you make your way straight back here. Understood?” He says, handing them each a clipboard. 

“Of course.” Abby says.

“Good. Now I’m not gonna sugar coat it, there’s some paparazzi outside of the hospital waiting for you, so be prepared.” Erin groans, and the doctor chuckles before he makes his way out of the room.

“Great, just what we needed.” Patty says, sighing.

“Come on. Holtz, are you okay to walk?” Holtzmann chuckles and sits up with a wince, and winks at Erin before she swings her legs off the bed and slowly stands.

“I said I’m okay, Erin.” She teases, but Erin can’t help but watch as she sways slightly and grips the bed before nodding.

“All good.” 

**********************************************************************************

Patty drives the Ecto-1 back to the Firehouse, and Erin sits in the back with Holtzmann, who curls up under a blanket and is uncharacteristically quiet the entire way home. Erin watches her, unable to help herself. 

“I’m gonna stay with Abby tonight, make sure to wake her up every few hours like the Doc said.” Patty says during the drive.

“Yeah, okay. Just make sure you get some rest, too, Patty.” Erin says softly. She smiles.

“Will do, baby.” Holtzmann suddenly hisses as a car passes them in the opposite direction, its headlights incredibly bright, lighting up the whole car and Erin frowns as Holtzmann drags the blanket up to cover her face.

“Bright.” She mumbles. When they reach the Firehouse, Kevin is waiting for them, a look of concern on his face as he takes in his incredibly bruises and battered friends.

“I heard what happened! Is everyone alright?” He asks as soon as they get out of the car.

“Yeah, we’re all good, Kev. We’re just gonna get some sleep.”

“Yeah, no worries. I was gonna turn in myself. If you need anything, let me know guys, I took a first aid course a few years back, I know medicine stuff.” Erin groans, but simply nods, unable to stop herself as Kevin smiles brightly and helps them back into the Firehouse.

They all retire to their rooms on the third floor, and Erin watches as Holtzmann opens her door, wincing as she does when she turns the light on.

“Holtz? Do you want me to stay with you?” Erin asks. Holtzmann smiles at her weakly and shakes her head.

“I’ll be fine, Erin. Goodnight.” She enters her room, but Erin notices that she shuts the light off before closing the door, and she frowns before entering her own room.  
She quickly unbuttons her jeans with one hand and shoves them off herself before practically collapsing on her bed, hissing in pain when her shoulder hits the mattress. 

There’s few things Erin’s absolutely sure of.

She believes in Ghosts. She believes in the Other Side. She believes in Science.

But when a memory of what the Ghost’s face looked like before she got slammed into the wall flashes through her mind, she finds herself having new nightmares to join her ones of New York and the Vortex.

Because she could’ve sworn, even if it was a glance, that she saw fangs instead of teeth.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trigger warning: blood and gore.

The sound of a siren blaring echoes loudly in her mind, almost bouncing off the walls of her skull as she throws her pillow over her head in an attempt to muffle the sound.

It doesn’t.

She groans and lifts herself up, hissing at the pain that explodes throughout her whole body as her head pounds. It’s like she has a hangover. Except this is ten times worse than any hangover she’s ever had.

She rubs the sleep from her eyes and looks at the clock on her bedside table.

It’s three in the morning.

She blinks a few times, yawns tiredly before she sits up in her bed and simply sits there for a few moments.

Something feels off.

She runs her tongue over her teeth, and winces when pain is the first thing she feels when her tongue bumps over her gums, the ridges inflamed, and she rests her head against the palm of her hands and breathes for a few moments, trying to stop the pain from taking her over completely.

But it’s all over her. Her back, her legs, her arms, her chest, her mouth, god, her mouth, why does it feel like it’s on fire?

She groans again, this time a little more loudly and when she opens her eyes, she finds that despite the fact that her room is pitch black in darkness, she can see. She can see the dresser beside her. She can see the wall and the door that leads to her bathroom. She can see the other door that leads out into the hallway...

She frowns. 

Well that’s near impossible. 

She shakes her head and adjusts herself, prepared to lie back down in bed and simply drift off to sleep, but the pain in her mouth only grows and she stands and rushes to the bathroom as the taste of bile rises in the back of her throat. She throws the door open and barely manages to flip the lid of the toilet up before she’s throwing up, the sound of the contents of her stomach hitting the bowl and echoing, making her head pound even more.

_What is going on?_

She rests her head against the toilet seat for a few moments, simply focused on breathing as best she can before she flushes the toilet and stands. She walks to the sink, and looks up into her mirror. She pulls the chain that turns on the fluorescent light above the mirror, and as it blinks on, she hisses as the pain hits the back of her eyes and explodes throughout her body. She tugs the chain down again, turning it off and walking back out of the bathroom.

This is probably just an after effect of the Ghost throwing her around the place. She’s fine. Everything’s fine.

She crashes down onto her bed, runs her tongue over her gums once more, but the pain only becomes worse, and she growls in frustration.

She’s gotta have pain pills somewhere up here-

“Holtzmann.”

She freezes. The sound is close, almost like it’s right beside her, and she can hear someone open a door outside, can hear their footsteps on the wood of the floor in the hallway before there’s suddenly the sound of knocking on her door.

“Holtzmann?” The voice is definitely Erin’s, and she groans, clutching her head as the sound of her knocking on the door reverberates through her head, and she’s about to stand when the door is suddenly thrown open.

“Holtz, is everything okay?” A hand snakes out to flick the light on, and one second, Holtzmann is on the bed, and the next, she’s up and at the door, her hand closing around Erin’s wrist tightly.

“Don’t! Please.” She pleads, and she hears Erin gasp in pain as her grip loosens and she lets her go. 

“Holtzmann, are you okay?” Erin asks, walking into the room and closing the door behind her. She’s reaching out with her good arm in the darkness, and she knows that Erin can’t see anything, but somehow she can. 

“I-I’m fine, Erin.” Erin’s head turns at the sound of her voice, and she reaches out, her good hand flailing out to find her and she meets her halfway, her hand closing around Erin’s forearm.

“I’m here.”

“Oh, hey. Are you sure? I can hear you moaning from my room, are you pain?” She bites her lip, contemplates not telling her the truth. 

“I...yeah. I think I need Tylenol, or something.”

“Okay, do you want me to go get you some?” Erin asks softly. She can feel tears building in her eyes now, something she can’t even begin to explain as she nods.

“Yes, please.” She whispers. Erin smiles, and she can see it in the darkness as she squeezes her hand and makes her way back to the door. She doesn’t close the door behind her as she enters the hallway, she decides to stay in the corner of the room where it’s the darkest. Lights are too bright, too bright...

“Holtz?” Erin makes her way back into the room now, carrying a glass of water, and she rushes forward and takes the glass from her hand as Erin sighs and holds out the hand in the sling.

“I got two.” She reaches out, takes the pills from Erin’s hand and throws them into her mouth, munching on them a little before she raises the glass to her lips.

As soon as the water hits her tongue, her throat begins burning like it’s on fire, and she coughs, spluttering as water falls all over her body as she drops the glass and it smashes on the floor.

“Whoa! Holtzmann! What happened?” Erin shouts, looking around the darkness in shock.

“My mouth.” She manages to gasp out. 

“What?”

“Fire.” She can’t speak. Can’t think. Everything hurts. 

“Holtz, let me put a light on, let me help-.”

“Get out.” Her mouth is burning, but she can smell something now, something that makes her stomach turn and her heart begin racing as her head pounds with the want for it, the need for it, she needs it, what is it, where is it coming from-

“Holtz!” She growls, fingers closing around Erin’s bicep as she shoves her out of the door and into the hallway, slamming the door shut behind her as she looks around for the source.

“Holtzmann!” Loud banging on the door. It echoes in her mind, her head is hurting, her mouth is hurting, she wants it to stop, someone make it stop-

“Holtzmann, open the door!” Erin shouts. 

The pain intensifies. She screams, fingers clutching at her mouth and she runs into the bathroom and clicks the light on, hisses in pain as it burns her eyes, her skin, her body, and she clicks it off, but she needs to see, needs to know what’s going on-

“Yo, Holtzy! Stop playin’, open this door!” 

Patty. Patty’s voice. 

She needs to get out of here. They won’t leave her alone. 

“GET OUT!” She screams so loudly, it almost tears her voice box, and she runs out of the bathroom, and suddenly, that same scent hits her.

She needs it. What is it, she needs it like she needs air-

Window. Coming from the window.

She isn’t sure what compels her to do it. She hears the sound of Patty yelling, but she ignores it and opens the window, sliding the panel up as her eyes fall to the street below her. She pokes her head out of the window.

Then her arm. Then her leg.

And then she’s dropping.

She’s expecting the impact, waits for her shins to shatter from the ten foot drop, but instead, her bare feet fall against the concrete floor softly, almost gracefully, and she lands on her hands as well, uses them to steady herself as she sniffs the air surrounding her.

The scent, it’s coming from her left, it’s strong, and it’s something she’s never smelled before-

She’s running, and everything is a blur around her as her feet carry her faster than they ever have before in an attempt to alleviate the pain, but it won’t go away. It’s burning, fire all over her body, but she’s running, and it’s exhilarating and powerful and beautiful and this feels amazing-

A scent hits her and causes her feet to come to a stop in front of an alleyway. The scent is different this time, but still appealing.

She needs to know what it is, needs to find the source, it’s going to kill her if she doesn’t find out-

“Hey, ma’am, are you alright?” She turns her head, looks into the alleyway. 

A young boy, possibly in his late twenties. Ragged clothes. Dirt on his face. She looks down. Cardboard boxes make up his home. 

She looks at him. He’s white. 

“A homeless white boy? Don’t see those every day.” Her voice is different. Strange. She doesn’t like it. She can’t stop it. The boy’s eyes widen, and he chuckles nervously.

“Don’t often see a beautiful woman tearing down the street in just her underwear and T-shirt either, ma’am. Are you alright?” She looks down at herself. She is indeed, in just her underwear and a T-shirt. But she isn’t cold. 

“I...I smelled something. Something good, I...I don’t know where it was coming from, but I need it.” She clenches her teeth, grinding them as her throat burns again, and the scent grows stronger as the boy steps forward.

“Food?” His eyes are hopeful, and he looks around the place. She shakes her head, and the action makes her head spin as she sways. The boy rushes forward, arms reaching for her as he steadies her and she grips him, nails digging into his arms as he holds her up.

“Maybe we should get you to a Doctor.” 

The scent is overwhelming now.

It’s him. 

It’s him, she knows it’s him, but how is it him, she doesn’t understand-

“Ma’am? Can you hear me?” Her throat is dry, so dry...

She licks her lips. Her eyes move up to stare at him. He smiles down at her.

“Come on, I’ll help you.” He lifts his head.

She has access to his neck. She sees his pulse, the skin throbbing, and her throat burns.

She can’t, this isn’t possible-

Her fingers reach up, hand touching his jaw and he looks down at her in surprise, leans in, lips close to hers-

Her fingers close around his throat. He chokes, she shoves him against the brick wall of the alleyway.

She can feel the throbbing of his pulse beneath her fingers. Her blood is pumping. Not enough blood. Her head hurts. Her body hurts.

“Not what I’m after.” She hisses. The boy’s eyes widen.

Fear. Pure fear.

She cares more for what she needs than what he fears.

The pain that’s been exploding through her mouth suddenly grows, and she lets him go in a moment of weakness, clutching her mouth and gasping for air as she feels something sharp rip through her gums-

She screams, the pain too much.

She hears pounding footsteps. He’s running. 

She’s faster. She turns, finds him, and runs.

He’s against the wall again. 

“Please! Please, don’t kill me!” His voice is desperate. She doesn’t notice.

She needs it.

She grabs him by the ear and tugs his head to the side. 

She bites down. She breaks skin.

Warmth. Pure and hot warmth floods her taste-buds and covers the inside of her mouth, washing over her sore and inflamed gums, and suddenly, her mouth is no longer hurting, the pain in her throat is disappearing, her head is no longer pounding, her body feels like it’s brand new as she drinks from this fountain of health that she’s discovered, her hands pulling the boy closer as his hold on her shoulder slackens, and this is what heaven must feel like-

He sags against her. She lets him go. He drops, like a puppet whose strings have just been cut off as he collapses in on himself.

She licks her lips, moans at the loss of the flow of blood. Her eyes meet his, wide and unfocused and glassy. She bends down, reaches for him.

He’s dead. She can no longer feel his warmth. No longer hear his heart.

She’s killed him.

“No...No, no, no, no...” Her fingers grasp him, shake him. He’s limp, not moving, just staring, the last emotion he ever felt blowing his pupils and taking over his delicate features.

Fear.

“What did you do, what did you do...” She blinks tears out of her eyes. They fall, mingle with the blood staining her mouth as she falls back and crawls away from him, her eyes never leaving him.

She’s not sure how long she sits there, watching his body, still and decaying, her breath coming out ragged and misty from the cold that clings to her body, but she doesn’t feel it. 

She just murdered someone.

She needs to go back to the Firehouse, needs to find Erin and Patty, they’ll know what to do-

She can’t face them. She’s killed someone, she can’t go back, she can’t...

Where is she supposed to go?

The Nightclub. She needs to know what happened to her.

She needs to know.

She’s running, not sure where she’s going as she takes off, keeping her eyes peeled for anything that looks vaguely familiar. 

She finds the purple and black building. Finds the neon sign that blinks at her and she comes to a stop, looks down at herself.

She’s in her underwear and a T-shirt.

“Shit...” She bites her lip, tastes the dried blood, feels her throat burn.

She can’t walk in like this.

She needs to get into the bathroom. 

She walks into the alleyway beside the Club, looks for a back door or some kind of different entrance than the front one. She looks down, notices the window. She’s acting before the thought even crosses her mind.

She grabs a broken piece of brick and throws it at the window. It shatters, echoing in the alleyway as she walks toward it and lowers herself to the ground. It’s a small window, but she manages to squeeze through nonetheless, hissing as the jagged edges of the broken glass cuts the skin at her back. She pulls herself through with her arms and falls down a short way, and turns, eyes peeled for the Ghost.

When she finds a completely normal looking bathroom staring back at her, as well as a urinal, she curses under her breath.

She’s entered the male’s bathroom.

“Dammit.” 

She turns back and reaches up, fingers groping for the ledge as she pulls herself up and through the window.

Light is beginning to filter around her, and she walks out of the alleyway and looks out onto the horizon to see the sun beginning to rise. It breaks over the horizon, flooding New York City with light.

And flooding her with pain.

She screams, her skin suddenly burning as if it were on fire and she looks down to see her skin beginning to blister, the skin bubbling like acid has been poured all over her skin and she runs back down the alleyway and through the window. She collapses to the ground, crawling into a part of shade in the bathroom as she gasps for breath, the pain turning into a dull throbbing. She looks down at her skin, watches at is slowly begins to stop bubbling, and she sobs, clutching her chest, nails digging into her bare thighs.

What is going on, what’s happening to her, how did this happen-

She stands, makes her way to the door of the male bathroom as she exits. When she enters the club, she finds it empty, and she turns to her right and grabs the yellow tape that’s been put over the girl’s bathroom. She tears it down and enters, ignoring the sound of someone shouting behind her as she enters the bathroom.

The stalls are all broken, some of the toilets torn apart, as well as a sink, the tiles cracked from where she and Erin were thrown around...

The Ghost, where is it?

“HEY! I KNOW YOU’RE IN HERE! SHOW YOURSELF!” She screams, looking around the bathroom, and she jumps when the door opens and a familiar face looks at her in anger, before it turns to shock.

Ellie. The club owner.

“Whoa!” She jumps back, staring at this half naked, blood stained woman before her in confusion before her eyes widen.

“Wait a minute, aren’t you one of the Ghostbusters?” 

She’s not sure how it happens. Her hand reaches out, and she’s rushing toward Ellie with a growl, her hand closing around the young woman’s throat as she pushes her up against the tiled wall. 

“Where is it?” Her voice comes out harsh, so unlike herself, but there’s so much about her that’s changed, it no longer bothers her.

“Where...what?” Ellie manages to gasp out, her hands gripping the wrist of the hand around her neck. She growls.

“The Ghost. It did something to me.” She hisses. Ellie’s eyes widen and she shakes her head.

“I haven’t-been here-since the incident!” Ellie chokes out. 

“It did something...” She trails off, tears threatening to fall. She loosens her grip, but doesn’t let go as Ellie coughs and gasps for air, sagging against the wall as tears fall down her cheeks.

“Look, I don’t know what’s going on, okay? That Ghost, or whatever it is, I don’t know what it’s done, please let me go, just let me go-.”

“Shut up.” Ellie purses her lips and lets out a choked sob, and she looks around her once more before she glares back at Ellie. 

“Don’t scream. Don’t run. Or I will hurt you.” She’s surprised by the words that escape her. She’s not like, this isn’t her, she doesn’t threaten people, but she needs to know what the hell is going on, because she just murdered someone-

She just murdered someone.

The tears fall as she bites her lip, and she lets go of the club owner, who presses herself against the wall in fear.

“There’s...there’s blood all over you. What happened?” Ellie whispers. She shakes her head, licks her blood stained lips. Her throat burns as soon as the metallic tasting substance hits her taste buds.

She wants more.

She needs more.

“Are you open?” She asks. Ellie shakes her head.

“N-No, not after what happened. We have to renovate the women’s bathroom. Please...” 

“Is there anyone else here?” 

“N-No...” She seems to realize her mistake a second too late, as her eyes widen and she shakes her head.

“I...please, what do you want?” Ellie begins crying now. She should leave. She should get out of here before she does something she’ll regret, before she hurts this young club owner who’s never done anything to harm her-

“You...you call us, if that Ghost comes back. I...I need to see it, I need to know what it did to me.” Ellie nods viciously.

“Okay. I promise. I will!” Ellie says hurriedly, and she runs a hand through her hair before making her way back to the window. 

“Fucking psycho.” 

It’s small. If she wasn’t so different now, she wouldn’t have heard it. It wouldn’t have bothered her, even.

Now? Now an anger unlike anything takes her over and she turns, her nails digging into her palms.

_Walk away. Walk away, dammit._

“What did you say?” Her brown eyes widen. She can hear her heart beating wildly. Can smell the fear.

She can’t, no she shouldn’t-

Ellie rushes for the door. She chases her. The chase exhilarates her. 

They both exit the bathroom. Ellie trips. She shouts in pain as she collapses, her hand flying up to her head. She pulls her hand away.

Blood.

The scent fills her nostrils, fills her brain, fogs her mind up...

She needs it.

She walks slowly toward Ellie, who crawls away, tears falling down her cheeks.

Somewhere in the back of her mind, she’s shouting. She’s screaming to stop. She’s begging for this to end, for her not to hurt this poor woman who has done nothing to her-

That voice is miniscule. That voice is weak. 

Her hand snakes out and grabs Ellie by the throat.

“PLEASE, DON’T!” She screams. She brings the young brunette closer to her. Her tongue darts out, and she gets just a taste of the blood from the wound on her head-

Her teeth flare with pain, that same pain she felt in the alleyway when she attacked that young man, and then the need for blood is all she knows.

She’s grabbing Ellie’s hair and yanking her head to the side, and her teeth are digging into the flesh at Ellie’s neck, and she screams in her ear, but she simply bites down harder, the liquid pouring down her throat, warming her, filling her, satisfying and fulfilling her-

Ellie’s screams turn into moans. She finds herself holding the brunette up, arms groping at her back, before she feels her stomach turn and she pulls herself away from Ellie, who stumbles back and drops to the ground, still and unmoving.

She looks up. A mirror is on the other side of the room, and for the first time, she gets a look at herself.

She’s running toward the mirror, her heart pounding.

Her eyes are bloodshot, the red veins in her eyes bloody and raw and her normally sky blue eyes glowing golden, the veins in her face bulging and her teeth...her canines protrude almost past her lower lip, sharp and pointed, covered in blood-

One word reverberates in her mind, but she refuses to say it aloud, to make this real as she stumbles back, and hits into something. She looks down at Ellie’s limp body, drops to her knees, and pulls the young brunette into her arms. 

She reaches for her pulse with shaking hands, desperately tries to hear for a pulse, but there’s nothing.

She lets out a choked sob, holds the young woman in her arms, swaying back and forth as the realization hits her.

She’s killed two people tonight.

She’s a monster.

**************************************************************

“Erin, maybe we should let the police handle this-.”

“No. This is our friend, we aren’t stopping until we find her.” 

Erin blinks back fatigue and cranes her neck, and Patty sighs as she nods and her grip on the steering wheel tightens.

They’d been looking for Holtzmann for almost four hours now, ever since she disappeared on them at the Firehouse, and she can feel the lack of sleep beginning to affect her as she blinks again and yawns. Abby leans forward from the backseat, and Erin bites her lip. She didn’t want Abby to come, knowing full well that she was battling a concussion and should be resting, but Abby refused not to come with them.

“Where do you think she’ll be?” Abby asks. Patty suddenly gasps and claps a hand to her forehead.

“Damn, we are so stupid! The club! Maybe she went there to get answers, you said that it might be a symptom of her attack from that Ghost, right? And if she ain’t at the Hospital-.”

“She’s bound to be at the place where it happened.” Erin finishes, her heart racing. Patty slams her foot onto the accelerator, and Erin looks at Abby in concern.

“What if we don’t find her there?”

“We keep looking.” Abby says simply, and Erin nods, glad that her best friend has the same mindset as her. 

“Alright. I’m tired as hell, but alright.” Patty says, sighing, and Erin rubs her shoulder sympathetically. 

As soon as they reach the Club, Erin throws her door open and runs out. She reaches the front door and goes to open it, but finds it’s locked. She tugs on it, growling in frustration, and Patty shakes her head.

“Hell no, we didn’t come all this way for us not to be able to even get in.” She turns and reaches beside her, grabbing a rock from the ground and throwing it at the glass door.

“Patty!” The glass shatters, and Erin jumps back, looking around, glad that the street is empty as Abby glares at Patty.

“We’re gonna have to pay for that!” She exclaims. Patty shrugs. 

“We already paying for the renovation to the bathroom. Come on.” She walks in, and Erin sighs, but follows after her as they enter the club.

“Holtzmann?” Erin calls out. She makes her way into the club-

And stops short. 

On the dancefloor, two figures are on the floor, one of them limp in the other’s lap, and when Erin seems the blonde hair, her stomach drops.

“Holtzmann?” Her voice is quiet now, but the blonde looks up, and Erin collapses to her knees, a sob escaping her as fear floods her entire body.

Holtzmann’s face is covered in blood and tears, her face contorted in pain as she holds the body in her arms closer, and Erin looks down, her heart dropping when she realizes it’s the club owner, Ellie. 

She’s covered in blood, her skin stark white and her body lifeless.

She’s dead.

“H-Holtzmann...”

“You shouldn’t be here.” Holtzmann’s voice is quiet, but it echoes around the room as she sways back and forth with Ellie’s body in her arms. Erin crawls forward slowly, Patty and Abby behind her, but they don’t move, and Erin thinks they may be too shocked or scared to move closer to the Engineer.

“Holtz, what happened?” Erin whispers. Holtzmann’s eyes grow distant as she looks down at Ellie again.

“I killed her.” Erin freezes, her heart dropping and her whole body shaking as she finally takes in the blood around Holtzmann’s mouth.

“W-what?”

“You need to leave.” Erin shakes her head, tears falling down her face. She doesn’t know what’s going on, doesn’t understand what’s happened, what’s wrong with Holtzmann, but she can’t leave her, she won’t-

“Holtz, let us help-.”

“Get out.” She says it through gritted teeth, her tone filled with venom and Erin purses her lips and looks behind her at Patty and Abby, who both look at her before Patty suddenly reaches forward and grips the bicep of her good arm.

“Don’t get too close.” She pulls Erin up and away from Holtzmann, and Erin shrugs her off and looks at her in shock.

“It’s Holtzmann, Patty.” She says, but Patty shakes her head and looks back at the Engineer.

“I don’t think it is, Erin.” She whispers. Erin looks at Abby, who is looking at Holtzmann as if she’s a stranger. Erin looks back at the Engineer, who slowly lays Ellie’s body down to the ground and stands, looking up at her friends with a blank expression.

“Holtz, let’s...let’s just get back to the Firehouse-.”

“I can’t.” Holtzmann rubs her palm against her bare thigh, and Erin swallows the lump in her throat.

“Holtzmann, we can figure this out there-.”

“I can’t leave. The sun is up.” She says simply, and Erin looks at her in confusion.

“What? Holtzmann-.”

“Get out.” Holtzmann says again. Erin shakes her head again.

“We’re not leaving you-.” Holtzmann growls, her back turned to them and Erin rushes forward, her hand reaching for Holtzmann’s shoulder.

“Holtz-.” As soon as she makes contact, Holtzmann spins, a growl escaping from her lips and Patty screams and grabs Erin, pulling her back, but Erin is staring at Holtzmann, unable to move without Patty helping her, too shocked, too scared to say or do anything.

Holtzmann’s eyes are glowing, gold and bright and bloodshot as the veins in her face bulge and her canine teeth suddenly elongate.

“GET OUT! GO!” She screams, and Erin puts two and two together, and it comes out of her in a mumble of words and confusion as Patty begins shoving her back toward the entrance of the Club, Abby rushing out behind them as Erin struggles to make her way back to Holtzmann because she has to be sure, she has to be positive-

“Erin, stop! We need to get back home, come on!” 

“Holtzmann-.”

“Look at me!” Patty grabs Erin’s face in her hands, and Erin can barely see her through her tears.

“She’ll come to us, you know she will, but right now, we gotta go!” She’s shoving Erin toward the car, and Erin throws herself into the passenger seat, unable to breathe, unable to speak, unable to focus.

Holtzmann’s not Holtzmann anymore.

She’s a monster.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i told you it was gonna be dark af.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y'all are sweet, this chapter is long af, i don't apologize, i hope you guys like it!

“Erin? Come on, baby, you gotta eat.” 

Patty’s voice is distant. Unheard among a crash of noises and screams and cries for help and despair and need for answers, for truth, for a reason. A reason as to why everything has come crashing down around them.

“Abby...”

“Erin? Can you hear me?” 

She can’t erase it. Can’t erase the image of Holtzmann, eyes terrifying, mouth covered in blood, and teeth-

Fangs.

_What happened to her? How did this happen to her? Why didn’t we stop it?_

“We gotta report it to the Police, Abby-.”

“And what? Have them mock us even more? We get enough flack for believing in Ghosts, I don’t want to get thrown in a looney bin for saying that one of our own has been turned into a...a-.”

“Vampire.” Erin chokes out. Abby sucks in a breath. Patty sighs. Erin simply stares into the void and waits for it to swallow her whole. 

“Look, whatever the hell she is, she killed someone. We can’t ignore it.” Patty crosses her arms over her chest adamantly. Abby bites her lip. Erin closes her eyes and whispers under her breath for a miracle. A miracle to take them back to yesterday afternoon. A miracle to make this whole nightmare end.

“Just...give us time here, Patty. Maybe Holtzmann will show up tonight and we can figure it out.” Patty’s expression turns stony, but she nods.

“Fine. But just so you know, if it wasn’t Holtzy we was talking about, my ass would’ve called the Police by now.” 

Erin curls up, hugging her legs with her one good arm and pressing her forehead into her knees as she breathes, lets out a silent ‘thank you’ to Patty for being understanding, for loving Holtzmann just as much as she does, to being open and ready to give her time, time to figure this out, time to understand-

“Uh, guys?” Kevin’s voice is soft. He’s not quite sure what’s going on, and Patty and Abby refused to tell him until they had the answers themselves. It was confusing enough for them. For Kevin, it would be like trying to solve a mathematical equation beyond his intelligence level. But he’s still taking calls and working, and Erin feels tears prick her eyes at the thought. The thought that despite the fact that everything was falling apart around them, Kevin was still doing his best.

“Yeah, Kev?”

“The Mayor’s assistant is here to see you. Um, Jennifer-.”

“Lynch. Yeah, let her in.” Abby sighs. Erin’s heart drops, and she presses herself further into her ball of comfort, her arm tightening around her legs. She wants the floor below her to collapse and swallow her whole. She wants the Vortex to appear again so she can fall right through it and disappear. This can’t be real, Holtzmann, killing people-

“This won’t be long, I came here simply to pass a message on from the Mayor.” Erin manages to gain enough motivation to lift her head up and rest her chin on her knees, looking up at the Mayor’s assistant and her ‘take no shit’ attitude, which is in full display as she stares at all three of them as if they’ve committed unforgiveable treason with piercing brown eyes.

“Where’s the fourth?” Erin’s heart pounds painfully and she buries her head back into her knees, a small whimper escaping her, which Abby covers up by coughing loudly.

“Uh, out. Getting lunch.” 

“Fine. Pass this message along to her. As happy as we are to continue letting you do your job, with full funding, we aren’t exactly proud to continue doing so if something like yesterday happens again. The Mayor isn’t exactly happy that he’s going to have to fork out $45,000 to repair the damage to that Nightclub. He’s asking that next time, you take more care in how you wrangle the...the-.”

“Ghosts.” Abby says through gritted teeth.

“Yes, those. He’s got enough to deal with as it is. There’s been a string of murders all over the City, and trying to keep it contained without alerting the media has been a mission and a half. Don’t add to his already overflowing plate of problems, ladies.” 

“We won’t, we’re sorry.”

“Murders?” Erin looks up, eyes meeting Jennifer’s, and she watches as the Mayor’s assistant, ever bossy and ever so irritating, softens under her stare and looks at her with what Erin notices is a spark of fear.

“Yes. Four over the last two weeks. We’re trying our best to keep it from becoming public, we don’t need a media circus or panic spreading.”

“How...how bad is it?” Jennifer looks at her in confusion, before she swallows loudly and tears her gaze away from Erin, her eyes meeting the floor.

“I’m not at liberty to discuss-.”

“Please. How are they being killed?” Erin stands now, moving toward Jennifer in desperation, and Abby makes a grab for her, whispering her name, but she shrugs her best friend off, stares the Mayor’s assistant down until she’s pursing her lips and nodding once.

“Neck injuries. Severe neck injuries resulting in fatal loss of blood. That’s all I can say.” She squares her shoulders and stares at each of them.

“Pass the message onto that other one, with the floppy blonde hair. And don’t let it happen again. I’ll see myself out.” Without another word, she turns on her heel and leaves, Kevin giving her a cheery wave, which she ignores as she opens the door to the Firehouse and slams it shut behind her. 

“Well, great. Now we got the Mayor on our ass-.”

“There’s been more murders before Holtzmann. That means there’s more out there like her.” Erin is looking at Abby breathlessly, her mind finally occupied with something other than fear and hopelessness. 

An equation. Something she can finally solve.

“Erin-.”

“Ellie said that the complaints came from two people, and that they said something about being bitten, right?” 

“Erin, they were drunk-.”

“It’s not a coincidence, Abby! Two girls say they’ve been bitten, then we encounter the same Ghost and Holtzmann is suddenly a...” She can’t bring it in her to say the word out loud again, and Abby shakes her head.

“We can’t. I-I can’t. Not until I see Holtzmann again. She can help us better understand-.”

“You don’t even know she’s going to come back here, Abby.”

“And what do you want to do? Go back to the Club and have her kill us instead?” Abby snaps. Erin finds herself stepping back, her heart pounding in her chest and her blood boiling with anger as Abby straightens herself up and lets out a huff of air.

“I’ve known Holtzmann a lot longer than you have, Erin. She’s coming back. And until she does, we’ll be here, waiting for her.” 

They stare each other down, both of them out of breath and both of them feeling years of pent up frustration beginning to boil over, and Erin can’t afford to lose another friend-  
“I need some air.” Her voice shakes, and she heads for the stairs, ignores Patty calling her back and ignores the second floor, refusing to look at Holtzmann’s equipment or her lab as she heads straight for the roof.

The sun hits her as soon as she opens the door, the warmth spreading throughout her body and blinding her eyes as she throws her good arm up to shield herself from it. 

How did everything go to shit so quickly?

How were they ever going to recover from this?

Holtzmann had killed someone. Holtzmann wasn’t even Holtzmann anymore. She was someone else. Something else.

How is Erin supposed to just sit by and do nothing while one of her best friend’s is out there, hunting and killing people?

And Jennifer...she said that people were being killed before. There were more out there like Holtzmann, who could have the answers she needed-

“Erin?” She turns at the sound of Patty’s voice, and her expression softens when Patty smiles at her and closes the door behind her, walking up to her and putting an arm around her gently.

“Look, I know this is tough. You and Holtzmann were close-.”

“Are close.” Erin corrects her. Patty sighs and Erin shakes her head.

“Don’t do that, Patty. Don’t give up on her. We don’t even know the full story yet-.”

“Erin, I saw her with a body in her arms, blood all over her, and a damn confession came out of her own mouth. I don’t need the full story. I know what happened. I love Holtzy, you know I do, but she killed someone. We can’t ignore that.” 

“She’s our friend.” Erin whispers. Tears fall before she can stop them and Patty leans in and presses a kiss to her hair.

“And we’re gonna do what we can to help her, but...if we can’t, then we can’t. We gotta let her go.” Patty’s voice is shaking, and Erin knows she doesn’t want to be saying these things, doesn’t want for any of it to be true... 

“I just need some alone time, Patty.” She sighs, but nods and removes herself from Erin as she makes her way back to the door. When she reaches, she turns and looks at Erin sadly.

“If Holtzmann’s still in there...she’ll come back to us, Erin. I know she will.” 

*******************************************************

Her eyes follow the seconds hand obsessively, watches as it ticks closer to twelve and the minute hand clangs as it moves down to the 3, before her eyes move back to the seconds hand and watch obsessively.

A pattern. A routine.

This has been Erin’s life for the last seven hours.

It’s now 12:15, and they’ve all been waiting for Holtzmann to show up, but so far, they’ve been disappointed.

Erin has a sinking feeling that they’ve lost their best friend forever, which has caused her to take up residency on the couch as she sinks further and further into despair with each passing minute, ignoring Abby’s mutters of ‘she’ll be here’ and Patty’s constant sighs. 

“Girl, maybe we should just-.”

“No. She’s gonna be here, Patty.”

“Look, maybe we gotta give her some space-.”

“Hey, Holtzmann!”

Kevin’s voice echoes out to them from the reception area, and Erin jumps up so fast, she feels her neck immediately flare with pain from the movement. She ignores it, pushing herself off the couch as she watches and waits.

When she turns the corner, Erin can’t help the sob of relief that escapes her.

Holtzmann stops short in front of them, and Erin’s eyes roam over her, her heart pounding loudly in her ears.

She’s different.

Her hair is down, crashing against her shoulders in waves, no longer covered in blood, but instead sleek and shiny. Her face is smooth, lips covered in red lipstick and her face is free of blood, and Erin is thankful, wanting nothing more than to scrub the memory of that Holtzmann from her mind like an unwanted fragrance still lingering on her. She’s wearing a simple T-shirt with the American flag on it, which has tears throughout it, and a leather jacket. Black jeans torn at the thighs and the knees cover her legs, black combat boots covering her feet, and Erin has never been more uncomfortable in her life.

This isn’t Holtzmann. 

It’s not only evident in her attire.

Her eyes, piercing blue as always, are stony, and cold, no longer filled with excitement and joy, and wonder.

Erin bites down on her lip to stop herself from crying as Holtzmann’s eyes dart over each of them before resting on Erin.

“I’m not staying long.” 

Her voice. 

Erin’s knees shake. It’s low, cold, and emotionless. 

_This isn’t my Holtzmann._

“Holtz...” Her eyes close at the sound of Erin’s voice, and she watches as Holtzmann swallows before shaking her head slowly.

“Don’t. I just came to tell you that I’m leaving. I can’t...I can’t stay here. I need answers.”

“Let us help you.” Abby steps forward. Holtzmann steps back.

“No. I don’t know what I’m capable of, and I’ve already killed people-.”

“People? As in plural?” Patty’s voice is loud, strong, accusatory. Erin feels the beads of sweat on her forehead as Holtzmann clenches her jaw and clears her throat.

“I’m not...I’m not me anymore. Things have changed, and they can’t go back. Don’t look for me. Don’t try to find me. Just let me go.” She goes to turn, but Erin is running forward before she can stop herself, shrugging out of her sling as a cry escapes her, and Holtzmann lets out a low growl before Erin is throwing her arms around the young Engineer, sobbing into her shoulder as she ignores the pain in her own shoulder. 

“Don’t go! Let us help you, please!” She feels Holtzmann become stiff in her arms, hears Patty and Abby hiss at her to stop, but she doesn’t care.

She doesn’t care because it’s Holtzmann. It’s fucking Holtzmann and she’s not leaving her, she can’t leave her-

“Please, just stay.” She croaks out. She feels Holtzmann’s jaw quiver against her ear, feels small arms wrap around her waist before Holtzmann whimpers, and Erin’s hold on her only tightens when she suddenly begins sobbing, her head collapsing into Erin’s shoulder as she cries. 

“I’ve got you, I’ve got you...” Erin coos gently, hands tangling in Holtzmann’s hair, before she feels Holtzmann’s breath on her neck and she’s suddenly pulling back, shaking her head and pursing her red stained lips.

“It’s too...it’s too hard.” She croaks out.

“What? What is?” Erin feels her shoulder flare with pain as she lifts it to grip Holtzmann’s bicep, and Holtzmann stares at her with bloodshot eyes as she sniffs.

“I don’t want to hurt you.” She whispers. 

“You won’t. You’ll only hurt me if you leave.” Erin says hoarsely. Holtzmann swallows.

“Erin...”

“Holtzmann, don’t leave. Please, let us help you. Let me help you. I’ll do anything, just don’t go.” Erin can hear the desperation in her voice, and if Holtzmann is shocked by it, she doesn’t show it. 

“Where...where do we even begin? What science can explain this?”

“The Ghost. The one that bit you-.”

“I tried all goddamn day, it wouldn’t come out to speak to me.” Holtzmann says through gritted teeth.

“Then we keep trying.” Abby’s voice pipes up, and Erin turns to look at her best friend, who is looking at Holtzmann with tears in her eyes. 

“How? I can’t...I can’t go out in the sun-.”

“Then we spend the day here, running tests, and we spend our nights trying to get that Ghost to talk.” Erin says firmly. Holtzmann shakes her head.

“They’re gonna start renovations on that Club soon-.”

“Well the owner is dead, so I don’t see how that’s gonna be a problem.” Patty says flatly. Erin glares at her, and Holtzmann suddenly shifts uncomfortably.

“Patty...”

“Can you at least tell me what you did with the body?” She asks. Holtzmann hesitates, tears shining in her eyes.

“As soon as the sun set, I moved the body and called the Police.” She whispers. Patty scoffs, and Erin shakes her head.

“Look, let’s just focus on what’s important-.”

“Like a dead girl ain’t important.” Patty mutters under her breath. Erin ignores her.

“What’s important is that we get answers. So the Club owner is dead, which means the Club will probably become property of the City. Which means it’ll probably be empty for a while before they decide what to do with it.” 

“We don’t even know that that Club is where the Ghost is. It was a Class 5 Ghost, Erin. It could’ve just been roaming around, we need to find out where its main burial or haunting ground is.” Abby says, removing her glasses and scratching her forehead with a sigh.

“You said the dress was old. Late 1400’s, right?” Erin says to Patty, and she rolls her eyes.

“Yeah, but New York wasn’t exactly around back then, Erin. I mean, it was, but no one found it yet. And that dress was definitely stuff I’ve seen when researching the Renaissance era in Italy.”

“So we’re dealing with an Italian Ghost currently haunting New York.” Erin concludes.

“Yeah, but even if we’re dealing with, I don’t know, some Ghost that followed its family here, do you know how many Italian Americans live in New York City? Narrowing it down is gonna take years.” 

“We don’t even know if it’s Italian.” Abby says, throwing her hands up in the air in exasperation.

“Then we keep trying the damn Club!” Erin growls. Holtzmann is silent throughout, and Erin turns to look at her before reaching out and gripping her hand. 

“We’re gonna figure this out, Holtz.” She bites down on her lip before nodding, and Abby rubs her eyes tiredly.

“We should probably get some rest. Tomorrow’s gonna be a big day.” Erin nods, and Abby walks past, stops beside Holtzmann before reaching out and touching her shoulder, smiling softly.

“I’m glad you’re back.” Holtzmann sucks in a breath and nods, and Abby makes her way to the third floor. Patty looks back and forth between Erin and Holtzmann, then walks toward the stairs, barely acknowledging them.

“Patty hates me.” Holtzmann says matter-of-factly, and Erin clears her throat uncomfortably.

“You know Patty, she’s...religious.”

“And thou shalt not kill.” Holtzmann says hollowly. Erin sighs and grips her elbow.

“Come on, let’s get some rest.” She steps forward, and Holtzmann suddenly shrugs out of her hold and purses her lips.

“I can’t.”

“Holtz-.”

“No, Erin, I...I literally can’t.” Erin watches her in confusion, and she sighs. 

“I can’t sleep anymore. I’ve tried, but...” It sinks in, and Erin’s eyes widen before she lets out a breath.

“O-Oh...” Holtzmann turns away from her, looking around the Firehouse as Kevin suddenly walks into the living room with a grin.

“Hey! I’m turning in, you guys should get some rest. Like the new look, Holtzmann.” He says, giving her finger guns, and she smiles, her first genuine smile since the incident and it warms Erin’s heart, her body tingling from the sight.

“Thanks, Kev.” He makes his way up the stairs, and Erin stifles a yawn as Holtzmann turns back to look at her.

“Why the outfit change?” Erin asks. She shrugs. 

“Felt right.” She says simply. Erin bites her lip and Holtzmann clears her throat awkwardly.

“I’m gonna head back to the Club, try the Ghost again.”

“I’ll come with you.”

“No. You stay here, get some rest.” Holtzmann says. Erin shakes her head.

“No, no way. I said I’d help you, and-.”

“Erin, I’ll come back.” 

Erin doesn’t know how she knows what she’s thinking, and for half a second, she wonders if Holtzmann can read her mind. She’s staring at her intently, blue eyes piercing, and Erin bites her lip, contemplates what she’s about to say, decides that Holtzmann deserves to know.

“Holtzmann, look there’s something you should know. Jennifer Lynch came to see us and she said that there’s been murders all over the City. Four in the last two weeks. All of them with severe neck injuries that resulted in loss of blood.” Holtzmann’s eyes widen, and Erin steps forward.

“There’s others out there like you. I think it might be the people who complained to the Club owner in the first place-.”

“Her name was Ellie.” Holtzmann says hollowly. Erin stops short, her heart pounding, and Holtzmann stares down at her chest before swallowing thickly.

“Calm down, please. I can hear your heart beating at a million miles an hour and it’s...distracting.” Erin takes a deep breath in, trying to calm her racing heart as Holtzmann shoves her hands into her pockets and closes her eyes, taking her own deep breaths in as Erin tries not to think about the fact that Holtzmann essentially just told her she was tempted to kill her. 

“I...if those people are out there, we need to find them. If they hurt someone else-.”

“I could hurt someone else. What does that make me?” Holtzmann says quietly. Erin shakes her head.

“No. You’re not like them-.”

“I killed two people last night, Erin. I’m worse than they are.” She says through clenched teeth. Erin blinks back tears.

“Holtz...” She runs a hand through her hair and moves away from Erin.

“I’ll find them. You just...you go get some rest. Please.”

“Holtz, you can’t leave-.”

“Why? You’re scared I’ll hurt someone again?” She growls, and Erin lets out a sigh of frustration.

“Holtzmann, I’m trying here! I just want to help, for god’s sake! You’re my friend and I care about you so much, I just...let me help, stop pushing me away-.”

“I’m a monster, Erin! Plain and simple. Nothing I do or say can change that now! And every second you’re near me, you’re in danger! How do you think that makes me feel? To know that every time you sit there and beg for me to let you help me, you’re putting yourself at risk? You think I don’t care about you, too? Why do you think I don’t want you to come with me?” Tears are falling down her cheeks now, shining on her porcelain skin, and Erin purses her lips, lets her own tears fall as Holtzmann shakes her head and steps back.

“Just...go. Go rest.”

“No. Not until you promise me.” 

“Promise you what?” Holtzmann sighs, her body almost sagging tiredly, and Erin moves forward, arms grabbing Holtzmann’s jacket and pulling her forward until their only inches apart, and Erin didn’t intend for them to be this close, a small gasp escaping her as Holtzmann’s breath hitches.

“Promise me you’ll be back before sunrise.” Erin whispers. Holtzmann closes her eyes, leans in, her forehead pressing against Erin’s as she grips her elbows.

“I promise.” She breathes. Erin smiles, closes her eyes, wishes they could stay in this moment, finds herself leaning forward before there’s a gush of wind that ruffles her hair and the feel of Holtzmann beneath her fingers is gone.

She opens her eyes to find the Engineer is nowhere in sight, as if she’s disappeared out of thin air, and Erin’s fingers brush her lips subconsciously, her mind wandering to the possibilities of what could’ve happened if she’d stayed.

**************************************************

She’s only been this way for a little over a day now, but Holtzmann is finding that running has an all new kind of freedom she never knew existed.

She never enjoyed running, never enjoyed any kind of physical activity that didn’t involve lifting heavy machinery and putting it back together in a brand new concoction.

Perhaps it’s the fact that now she can run faster than a car travelling at 100 miles an hour. Perhaps it’s that she never finds herself growing tired as she pumps her legs faster to go just that extra mile. 

It’s a freedom she never had before, and she loves it.

Except that this isn’t freedom.

She can’t think about anything but the need for blood. She can’t go out into the sunlight. She can’t sleep. She can’t eat human food, which she had discovered when she attempted to eat some at the Club while she’d been stuck there, Ellie’s body beginning to rot before her eyes. She remembers back to the young homeless man she’d murdered (her heart pounds painfully at the thought), and remembers how his body had begun to rot after only a matter of hours as well.

She isn’t sure what causes the sped up process of decomposition for the two bodies she’s left behind.

More questions. Still no answers.

She stops short, sighing as she pulls out her phone and checks the display screen.

It’s almost three. The sun will be rising in exactly four hours. 

She has four hours to find these other vampires and stop them.

She still finds the word hard to swallow, and she clears her throat, shoves her phone back into her pocket, and instead pulls out the pad and paper inside her leather jacket.

Inside the pad, is a list of questions.

_What caused this change?_

_Who is the Ghost who did this to me?_

_What am I, exactly?_

_Why do I crave blood?_

_Why can I no longer eat human food?_

_Why can I no longer sleep?_

_Why do the bodies of the people I’ve killed begin to decompose at an alarming rate?_

_Why do I feel my heart beginning to slow down whenever I go prolonged periods of time without blood?_

The last one causes her to frown. Her heart is already beginning to slow down, and her throat is beginning to itch, and Holtzmann sighs and adds two more questions to her list.

_How long can I go without blood?_

_What happens if I don’t drink blood for a prolonged period of time?_

She flips the pad shut and shoves it back into her jacket when she hears it.

A long and loud piercing scream to her left. She strains her ears, listens intently.

It’s coming from a few blocks away.

She runs, her legs running faster than she ever has before as she comes to a stop in front of an alleyway.

Two figures are hunched over a third on the floor, whimpers and groans emitting from the motionless figure as the two above it hover over it’s body. 

“Hey!” She rushes forward, watches as the two figures look up at her, eyes glowing golden in the dark as they stand and saunter forward, growls escaping them.

“Stop!” The scent of blood hits her nostrils, and the same piercing feeling through her gums causes her to wince as she snarls, and the two figures stop in their tracks, their faces finally in the light.

Two women. Both of them vampires.

“Another one? I wasn’t expecting that.” One of them says, smirking at her as it steps forward. 

“How long since you’ve been turned?” The other asks. Holtzmann swallows dryly.

“A day.” They both laugh, looking at her with newfound excitement as if she’s a new toy they’ve found to play with.

“So young! Come, join us. We’re just enjoying a snack.” Her eyes travel down to the figure on the ground, and the lust hits her as the scent fills her nostrils, burning her throat and causing her heart to ache and her head to pound-

“I need answers.” She croaks out. The one with the short brown hair chuckles, looks at the one with the blonde hair and shrugs.

“We don’t have many ourselves.” 

“But you have some?”

“What do you want to know?” The blonde asks. She reaches into her jacket with shaking hands, pulls out her pad, and readies her pen. They both scoff. She ignores them.

“What caused this change?” She reads. The blonde rolls her eyes.

“That Ghost that attacked us. Next.” She waves her hand nonchalantly, and Holtzmann shakes her head.

“How, though?”

“I don’t know. I never bothered to go back and ask.” She says, shrugging. Holtzmann grits her teeth, but moves on.

“I guess that means neither of you know who the Ghost is? Or what she’s turned us into?” They both laugh, shrill and high pitched, and Holtzmann winces at the sound.

“Well, it’s quite clear what she’s turned us into, sweetheart. We need blood, we don’t sleep, we have fangs. I think even you can put two and two together.” The brunette says, and Holtzmann nods. Another question unanswered. She wants specifics. She's a scientist after all. She instead moves down to her two recent questions.

“What’s the longest you’ve both gone without blood?” The brunette’s smile fades.

“Less than a day.”

“And what happened?”

“I got weak. I could barely move. My heart began beating two times a minute. I got some blood. I was good as new.” Holtzmann looks at the blonde, looks down at her questions. 

“So we constantly need it. Or-.”

“We die, I presume.” The brunette says.

“Enough with the questions.” The blonde snaps. Holtzmann shoves the pad back into her jacket and sucks in a breath.

“You two need to stop. You’re attracting the attention of the police and the Mayor. You keep this up, they’re gonna find you.” 

They both stare at her incredulously.

And then they laugh. And laugh. And laugh.

She waits patiently. She comes up with deductions and solutions in her mind as they jeer at her, and when they finally stop, she smirks. 

“We’re vampires. They couldn’t hurt us even if they tried.”

“What do you mean?” She asks, intrigue getting the better of her. The brunette smirks.

“We can’t get hurt. We heal faster than any human could dream. What would take weeks, takes minutes, seconds, even.” Holtzmann nods, impressed.

“Good to know.” And then she rushes forward, hands thrusting into the chests of both women, who gasp, eyes widening and hands grasping at her wrists as her fingers close around their hearts.

“I gave you a warning.” She hisses, and the anger floods through her as she pulls. 

All that’s left are gaping holes in both women’s chests, their pounding hearts beating in Holtzmann’s hands, and she squeezes, hears their high pitched screams before they suddenly burst into flames and the hearts in her hands turn to dust, crumbling around her as they burn, bright and terrifying until their skeletons are reduced to ash and all that’s left is dust on the ground, swept away by the wind. 

She breathes deeply, tries to calm herself, feels her heart refuse to pick up in pace despite the adrenaline rushing through her.

The need for blood grows stronger.

She stares down at the body, walks over to it. A young woman. She barely looks 20. Holtzmann closes her eyes, opens them. The young woman looks up at her with wide eyes, her whole body shaking as she extends a shaking hand.

“P-Please...” She gurgles. 

She could save her.

She wants to.

But even she can see the wounds are too deep. She’s bleeding out faster than she could race her to a Hospital.

And the need is too strong...

 

She can end it. She can end her suffering right here, right now...

“I...I can’t save you. But I can end it.” She bends down, reaches out, and touches her face gently. Tears fall down her face, and she nods.

“Please...” 

She leans in, bites down as softly as possibly. The woman gasps, fingers clutching the Engineer, and she drinks, cries as she feels the life leave the body beneath her, holds her close, intimately, passionately, anything to make her death painless...

Holtzmann pulls away, feels her heart beating in her chest painfully, excitedly, happily. 

She feels nothing but disgust.

The woman smiles.

“Thank you...” She breathes out, and then her eyes become glassy and move up, her pupils dilating as her hands fall to her sides. 

She cries. She holds her close and cries until her heart stops hurting. She looks up, sees the sky turning to a light blue, lays the young woman down gently, presses a bloody kiss to her forehead, and stands.

She wants nothing more than to stand here and let the sun take her, let its warmth turn her to dust.

But she can’t.

She made a promise.

**********************************************************

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

Her hand flies out and wraps around her phone, fingers slamming onto the touchscreen to shut the alarm up as she groans, but opens her eyes all the same, sitting up from the couch she’s fallen asleep on and yawning tiredly as she looks up at the clock. 

6:45.

She looks at the door expectantly, her heart racing with each passing second as the sun begins to slowly rise and fill the Firehouse with light, and Erin stands and begins pacing, her shoulder aching and her whole body shaking as the front doors burst open-

And Holtzmann steps through, howling as she kicks the door shut and disappears in the blink of an eye before reappearing in the darkness of the reception area.

“Holtz!” Erin runs forward, arms reaching for her best friend, and Erin sees her hissing as the skin on her face blisters, and Erin’s eyes widen.

“Oh my god-.”

“It’s fine, it’ll heal. It did last time.” Holtzmann hisses through gritted teeth. Erin takes in her appearance.

Hands covered in blood. Mouth covered in blood. Her heart drops.

“Holtz...” Holtzmann stops fidgeting, looks at Erin. Erin watches in amazement as the blistered skin begins to heal, turning porcelain white once more. She reaches out, fingers brushing against the healed skin and she feels Holtzmann shudder beneath her fingers.

"Amazing." Erin breathes. Holtzmann sucks in a breath.

“I found them.” She says simply. Erin stops short, her hand dropping to her side.

“The others?” Erin whispers. She nods.

“They were feeding off this poor girl. I...I stopped them. They realized what I was. I asked them some questions.”

“What questions?”

“Ones they didn’t have answers to. But they told me what would happen if I went a long time without blood.” 

“And?”

“I die.” She says gruffly. Erin’s heart truly stops beating now.

No. A world without Holtzmann isn’t a world worth living in.

“It won’t come to that.” Holtzmann sighs, but Erin can see a familiar look on her face that tells her there’s cogs working in her mind, and it’s like their back in the lab, Holtzmann helping Erin solve an impossible equation as she fingers her yellow tinted glasses and fiddles with her ear, and the memory brings tears to Erin’s eyes.

“They said that-why are you crying?” Erin shakes her head.

“I’m not, keep going, what did they say?” Holtzmann frowns, but keeps talking.

“One of them said that she went a day without blood and her heart slowed down to two beats per minute. Once she got blood back in her system, she was okay. So I figured the heart was the source of it all, of us functioning, and all that. The heart is what keeps us going, it pumps blood, circulates it through our bodies-.”

“So you need to drink blood to keep it going.” Erin concludes. Holtzmann nods.

"So I pulled their hearts out of their chests and crushed them and they turned to dust." She finishes. Erin blinks rapidly, trying to process what she just said before Holtzmann scratches her forehead absentmindedly.

“Whatever this thing is, that turns us into...vampires-.” She winces when she says the word. “Whatever it is, it stops our hearts from beating...it's all connected to the heart, they turned to dust the second I crushed theirs...”

“So...they're dead?” Erin says hollowly. Holtzmann’s expression turns stony.

“Oh yeah, they're dead.” She says simply. 

"And the girl they attacked?" Holtzmann's expression contorts as she winces, and she blinks rapidly.

"Dead." She says gruffly. Erin bites her lip and Holtzmann sighs.

"She was already badly wounded, I...she was on the ground and she asked me to..." She trails off, and Erin grips her hand, squeezing it tightly.

“We need to find that Ghost, we need answers.” Erin says. Holtzmann sighs and looks at the window, sees the sun filter through it and hit the wall beside her, only a sliver of shade keeping her safe from harm.

“Tonight. I’ll go back and-.”

“We’ll go back.” Erin corrects her. Holtzmann shakes her head.

“No-.”

“Don’t you dare. We’re in this together now, Holtzmann.” 

“But-.”

“No. No buts.” Holtzmann bites her lip, stares at Erin for almost a full minute before she nods.

“Alright, fine.” Erin grins.

“Good. Now make yourself comfortable. You’re stuck here till sundown.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's just getting darker and darker and i'm mean and horrible to holtzmann i know


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm so sorry guys this is a super short one cause I'm gonna be out for a few days and I didn't wanna leave without posting another chapter. Also it's short, but heartbreaking cause I'm evil. Next one should be up soon though, promise!

For the smallest amount of time, it goes back to normal.

Erin makes herself breakfast, eats and watches Holtzmann write furiously on a notepad, her brow furrowed until she sighs and makes her way up the stairs without a word. By the time Erin is done eating, and heads upstairs, she finds Holtzmann running around the lab at an inhuman speed, grabbing parts and wiring and putting things together, an excited glint in her eyes that Erin has never seen before.

“You’re fast.” She chokes out. Holtzmann stops and turns to look at her before grinning.

“Yeah! I’m getting so much done! I’ve already upgraded yours and Patty’s Proton Packs, that would usually take me a day to do! It’s insane!” She says breathlessly, twirling a wrench in her hands. Erin can’t help but grin back at her as she makes her way over to her own desk and sits, her eyes on Holtzmann as she darts around the room, her hands eventually flying up to place her hair in a loose bun, and Erin feels tears burn her eyes because it’s so normal.

 

It’s as if nothing has changed.

She revels in it, simply sits there and observes for over an hour, watches Holtzmann work and pretends that nothing has changed, that nothing is wrong, because she has to. Even if it’s just for a moment...

Everything is fine. For a moment, everything is fine.

Until it isn’t.

Holtzmann’s dancing around the table, humming under her breath when she suddenly stumbles and her hand flies out to grip the table. Erin finds herself standing and rushing over to her in a heartbeat as she clutches her head and moans.

“Holtz? What’s wrong?” Holtzmann shakes her head, her brow furrowed as she looks up and suddenly gasps, her eyes widening.

“What?” She whispers. Erin follows her gaze, sees nothing but brick wall staring back at her.

“Holtzmann? What’s wrong?”

“You-you don’t see her?” Holtzmann croaks out. Erin follows her gaze again. Nothing.

“No? See who?” 

“The-The woman, right there.” She points ahead of her, and Erin looks. Again, nothing.

“Holtz, there’s nothing there.” Holtzmann turns to look at her, a look of worry in her eyes before she turns back, blinks a few times, shakes her head, then looks again.

“I could’ve sworn I saw someone.” She whispers. Erin bites her lip, reaches out with shaking hands and grips Holtzmann’s shoulder, her hand gliding up to the back of her neck as she squeezes, and Holtzmann shudders.

“Maybe take a break, yeah?” Holtzmann bites her lip before nodding.

“Y-Yeah.” She drops her tools, sits down in the stool behind her and lets out a huff of breath, and Erin lets her go, finds her hands are tingling, shakes them and clears her throat.  
“Do you want me to make you some food?” Erin asks. Holtzmann’s expression turns stony before she suddenly looks down at her feet.

“Can’t eat human food anymore.” She mumbles. The words make Erin’s heart drop.

Human food.

Like she’s no longer human.

_She isn’t._

“Oh...” She lets out shakily, and Holtzmann frowns before rubbing her eyes.

“Uh, maybe you should go downstairs.”

“What, why?”

“Your heart-rate is really high again.” Holtzmann clenches her jaw. Erin’s heart only races even more.

“O-Okay.” She steps back, eyes on the young Engineer, who doesn’t look at her. She finds herself flying down the stairs at top speed, everything a blur around her from the tears threatening to fall down her face. 

It was normal. Just for a moment.

Back to reality.

She hears footsteps pounding down the stairs, and a mix of exhilaration and fear rushes through her at the thought that it might be Holtzmann when she sees it’s Abby and Patty, both of whom are talking in hushed whispers.

“I don’t gotta say ‘good morning’ to her-.”

“Patty, I get it that you’re upset about all of this, but it isn’t Holtz’s fault.” 

“I know, Abby-.”

“Guys?” They both look down as Erin waits at the bottom of the stairs for her, and Patty sighs before reaching the bottom and touching Erin’s shoulder.

“You alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. You passed Holtz?”

“Yeah. She didn’t seem too happy. What happened last night?” Abby asks. Erin sighs. 

“Nothing, it’s...it’s complicated.”

“Why are you down here? Did she say something to upset you?” Patty asks, crossing her arms over her chest. Erin bites her lip.

“No, I just...I was distracting her.”

“What? How? Holtz is never distracted by anything.” Abby says, frowning. Erin shakes her head.

“I think because I’m...you know, human-.”

“You’re telling me she threatened to kill you?” Patty’s voice is loud, and Erin is positive Holtzmann can hear them from upstairs and she glares at her.

“Will you keep your voice down? And no, she didn’t threaten me!” Erin hisses. Patty scoffs and shakes her head before making her way to the kitchen, and Erin watches as Abby’s eyes follow her before she sighs and rubs her forehead.

“Those two...it’s not gonna end well.”

“Holtzmann and I are heading to the Club as soon as the sun goes down, hopefully we can get some answers and find a cure or a way to fix her and everything can go back to normal.” Erin says. Abby simply looks at her.

“I don’t think anything’s ever gonna go back to normal now, Erin.” She says. Erin simply purses her lips as Abby clutches her shoulder and makes her way to the kitchen. 

Erin tries to ignore her best friend’s final words, and instead decides to occupy herself with work. She bites her lip and looks up the stairs, a part of her too afraid to head to her office in case Holtzmann is still struggling. 

The thought of Holtzmann losing control, of attacking her-

There’s a gust of wind and Erin stumbles back, looking around wildly to find Holtzmann walking toward the lounge. She flops down onto it, laying down on her back as she grabs the remote and begins watching TV. She flicks through the channels, barely blinking and Erin clears her throat before making her way over.

“Everything okay?” She asks. Holtzmann shrugs.

“Got everything done. Just waiting for the damn sun to set.” Erin looks over at Patty and Abby, who are frozen in spot as they look at the two scientists conversing. 

“So what happens? After the Club?” Erin asks. Holtzmann sits up and runs a hand through her hair.

“Well, we go to the Club. We try and find the Ghost. We get answers. And then...no idea.” 

“Are you gonna look for a cure?” Abby pipes up. Holtzmann chuckles darkly.

“There’s a high possibility there isn’t one.”

“So what? You’re just gonna keep going around murdering people?” Patty says through gritted teeth.

“Patty!” Erin growls, but she’s suddenly standing and marching over to them, a look of fury on her face. Erin looks down at Holtzmann, who clenches her jaw and glares up at her Patty.

“I didn’t kill them on purpose and you know it.”

“I don’t care! You still killed them! And it’s like you don’t even care-.”

“I don’t care?” Holtzmann growls, jumping up now, fury written all over her face and Erin stands between the both of them, fear running through her as Abby jumps up and grabs Patty’s arm.

“Patty, let’s go-.”

“No, you don’t! You just dumped that girl’s body for the police to find like a coward-."

“I did what I had to do!” Holtzmann says, her voice getting louder with each word and Erin can feel her whole body shaking now as she turns to face Holtzmann, who is glaring at Patty with intense hatred.

“You did what you had to do? What, killing people is what you had to do?” Patty says, laughing in disbelief and Erin watches as Holtzmann’s nails dig into her palms, her hands shaking as blood begins dripping from her closed fists.

“Do you think I’m enjoying this? Do you think I don’t hear their screams every single minute, every single second? Do you think I’m proud of this?” Holtzmann growls through gritted teeth. 

“Maybe you ain’t proud, but you still did it. You killed people. I ain’t heard no ‘sorry’ from your mouth.” Patty says. 

“And what? Saying sorry to you is going to make them come back, is it? You didn’t even know her-.”

“I don’t need to know her to know what you are!”

“And what is that?” Holtzmann growls. Patty pushes Abby away and points at Holtzmann accusingly.

“Jillian Holtzmann is dead to me. You ain’t nothing but a monster now.” She hisses. Erin watches as Holtzmann’s expression suddenly falls, tears brimming her eyes as she steps back and Erin watches as Patty wipes the tears from her own cheeks before she walks away, grabbing her jacket and walking out of the Firehouse before they can call her back. 

Erin blinks back tears as Abby looks at Holtzmann before leaving without a word, grabbing her own jacket as she races after Patty. Erin is stock still, unable to move, unable to think, and Holtzmann sniffs before she begins walking toward the stairs, stumbling, as if she's drunk.

“Holtz-.”

“Don’t, Erin. She’s...she’s right. I’m a monster. And you need to stay away from me.” Holtzmann whispers shakily, and before Erin can respond, she races up the stairs, gone in the blink of an eye.

Erin can feel her chest constricting, panic beginning to rise and cause her whole body to shake violently as she sits down and tries to breathe, sobs escaping her chest.

How did everything go so wrong? How is she supposed to fix this? She has to fix this. 

“Hey, Erin? Is everything alright?” She looks up, sees Kevin walking down the stairs toward her with a frown. She wipes her tears away, tries to talk, but all that escapes is a whimper.

“Hey, it’s okay!” He sits down, wraps an arm around her shoulders, and even though she loves him, and the fact that he’s trying so hard to comfort her, right now it’s suffocating.

“K-Kev-.”

“Erin, I’m really sorry, I’ve got a family emergency.”

“Is-Is everything o-okay?” She manages to choke out.

“Yeah, Mike Hat’s just been having some issues lately, doesn’t matter, look, don’t be upset! Whatever is wrong is gonna work itself out!” Kevin gives her his brightest smile, and Erin simply nods, giving him a shaky smile in return, too tired, too exhausted to even begin to explain all of this to him. He had a hard enough time believing in Ghosts, telling him about Vampires was going to be even worse. He jumps up and makes his way out of the door, and Erin buries her head into the pillow on the couch and cries, unable to stop herself.

She’s failed.

***********************

Patty and Abby don’t return, and Erin suspects that they won’t be back for a long while, perhaps even after the sun sets, when they know Holtzmann is no longer at the Firehouse.

Erin stays downstairs, watches the clock tick closer and closer to 4:30, to when she and Holtzmann can finally leave and go to the Club to get answers.

She eventually stops crying, forces herself to focus on what’s important. Getting answers for Holtzmann. Finding a cure. Bringing her family back together.

This is what Erin does. She finds a problem. She finds a solution. Crying doesn’t fix things.

When 4:25 ticks by, Erin stands at the sound of footsteps pounding down the stairs and watches as Holtzmann shrugs her leather jacket on.

“Ready to go?” Erin asks, her voice cracking from lack of use. Holtzmann doesn’t look at her.

“You’re not coming.” Erin stops short.

“Wh-what?” 

“I saw the woman again, I knew she was real. I need to do this alone." 

"What woman?"

"I don't know who she is, but she said the Ghost was waiting for me at the Club. Stay here, where I know you’re safe.” She’s already half way to the door, and Erin chases after her.

“N-No, we agreed we would do this together-.”

“Erin, don’t bother. I’m not changing my mind-.”

“The hell you aren’t!” Erin grabs her arm and pulls her, and Holtzmann stops and turns, her eyes cold as she glares at the physicist.

“Did you not hear what Patty said?” She hisses. Erin glares at her, anger and fear and god knows what else bubbling up inside her.

“I don’t care what Patty said. I’m not letting you do this alone.” 

“You don’t have a choice.” She goes to turn. Erin tightens her hold and tugs.

“Can you stop being so fucking dramatic and just let me come with you?” She hisses. Holtzmann growls.

“What part of ‘I’m dangerous’ do you not seem to be grasping, Erin? Every time your heart beat starts racing, all I can think about is sinking my teeth into your neck and draining you dry. And you’re telling me you want to come with me to an abandoned club where no one can hear you scream?” 

Erin doesn’t reply. Doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t do anything. Her grip only tightens. Holtzmann stares down at her hand, scoffs, and looks up at her.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” She says incredulously. 

“I. Am. Not. Losing. You.” Erin punctuates each word, steps forward until she’s right in Holtzmann’s face, watches as Holtzmann’s eyes fall down to her lips and back up again as she swallows, her eyes softening.

“Erin, if...if I hurt you-.” She whispers.

“You won’t. I believe that.” Erin states simply. Holtzmann blinks rapidly, bites her lip as she contemplates. 

“You’re injured.” Holtzmann says, looking at Erin’s shoulder, which isn’t even in its sling, and Erin shakes her head.

“Not an excuse.”

“What if the Ghost attacks again?”

“Still not an excuse.”

“Erin-.”

“Holtzmann, shut up. Please. I can’t not do this, I can’t watch you go through this alone, I won’t. You need friends. You need me.” 

She still doesn’t say anything. Erin looks at the window, watches as the sun’s rays disappear. Holtzmann sighs and looks out of the window before turning back to Erin. 

“Please...” Erin whispers. Holtzmann blinks back tears before she suddenly leans in, her mouth at Erin’s ear.

“I’m sorry.”

A gust of wind.

She’s gone.

Erin blinks, eyes widening as she looks around in shock and sees the Firehouse door shut. She curses under her breath, wipes away her tears before they even fall and rushes toward the Garage, grabbing the keys to the Ecto-1 as she does.

Because this is what Erin Gilbert does. She encouters a problem...

She comes up with a solution.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> forever saddened that this doesn't have a lot of comments. It's all good though, I'm glad some of you are enjoying it!

The cold breeze hits her hard as she exits the car and closes the door shut, a shiver running up her spine as she looks up at the now abandoned Nightclub that she had entered just the other day with her fellow Ghostbusters to do their job.

Back when Holtzmann was still Holtzmann.

She bites down on her lip and tucks the keys to the Ecto-1 into her pocket. Her eyes roam over the glass door that Patty had broken down, which now has police tape over it, and it hits Erin that this place has officially become a crime scene. 

They must have found Ellie’s body.

_We have to be quick._

She’s barely ducked under the police tape when she feels herself being yanked forward and her back slams against the wall. She groans in pain before a hand covers her mouth and when she finally focuses her eyes, she finds Holtzmann glaring at her before her eyes widen in shock.

“Erin?” She lets her go, and Erin reaches out to grip her injured shoulder, which is burning from the impact as Holtzmann growls under her breath.

“You followed me?” She hisses. Erin simply nods.

“I wasn’t gonna leave you twice.” She echoes, her mind flashing back to saving Abby from that Vortex, and Holtzmann shakes her head before looking out into the Club.

“Fine. Let’s go.” Erin hesitates, the thought of the Ghost potentially attacking them both again and turning her into what she’s turned Holtzmann into suddenly attacking her mind, and Holtzmann stops and turns to look at her before she sighs.

“This is why I didn’t want you to come.” She says softly. Erin frowns, and Holtzmann moves forward.

“You’re scared. You have every right to be. But I’m gonna keep you safe, I promise.” Erin cocks an eyebrow, can’t help but smile as she looks at the young Engineer.

“Can you read my mind or something?” She asks. Holtzmann chuckles, shaking her head.

“No. I just know you.” Erin bites her lip, the words sending a rush of euphoria through her that she can’t quite explain as Holtzmann holds out her hand for Erin to take.

“Come on.” Erin takes a deep breath in and nods, reaches out, intertwining her fingers with Holtzmann’s. They’re soft, no longer calloused like they used to be and Erin realizes that her healing effect spreads than more than just burns she gets from the sun. Holtzmann tugs her along gently, leading her into the club as they cross past the dancefloor and head to the ladies bathroom.

“We won’t have long. This place is a crime scene, there was police tape at the front-.”

“I know. We’ll make this quick.” Holtzmann says urgently. Erin can’t help but notice that the dancefloor is clean, and a faint smell of bleach is hanging in the air, and Erin realizes that Holtzmann must have spent a majority of her time stuck in the Club cleaning up her mess. The thought makes her stomach turn as Holtzmann tears off the construction tape blocking the door to the women’s bathroom with ease. 

They both enter, and Erin can’t help the way her heart begins to accelerate as they enter the bathroom. Holtzmann’s hold on her hand tightens as she rounds the corner.

Her eyes widen and she stops, and Erin freezes at the doorway.

“She’s here.” Holtzmann whispers. Erin moves to look, but Holtzmann suddenly lets go of her hand and pushes her back behind the doorway.

“Don’t. If she can’t see you, she can’t hurt you.” Erin frowns at this logic, but stays behind the door as Holtzmann purses her lips. Erin peeks around the corner and sees only a pearly white translucent figure floating near the last stall, its back turned to them. She ducks back behind the door as Holtzmann suddenly clears her throat.

“She told me you’d be here! That you’d give me answers!” Holtzmann shouts. 

There’s no answer.

Erin finds her nails digging into the wood of the wall behind her as Holtzmann growls under her breath and looks at Erin, who nods encouragingly.

“You changed me! Turned me into a monster! I deserve answers, and I’m not leaving here until I get them!” 

More silence. Erin watches as Holtzmann’s fingers dig into her palms before there’s suddenly the sound of a chuckle.

“You have your answers already.” The voice echoes around the bathroom, bouncing off the walls and Erin sucks in a breath and watches as Holtzmann’s eyes widen before she grits her teeth.

“What am I?”

“You know what you are.” The voice says. Erin peeks around the corner to see the Ghost has turned to face them now, and it looks at her before smiling.

“I see you. You don’t have to hide. I won’t harm you.” Erin’s heart drops, and Holtzmann growls and shakes her head.

“You’re damn right you won’t hurt her, because if you do, I’ll bring you back to life and kill you again. Now tell me. What am I?” The Ghost looks at Holtzmann, and suddenly begins floating forward, and Erin pushes herself further into the wall, as if it’ll hide her from the supernatural being.

“You’re a Vampire.” The Ghost says simply. Holtzmann grinds her teeth together, clenching her jaw.

“Are you a Vampire?” She says hollowly.

“Yes...and no. A Vampire before I was killed by those who hunted me.” 

“Those who hunted you? How old are you?” Erin asks from around the door. Holtzmann glares at her, and Erin shrugs as the Ghost sighs.

“I was born in 1476, in Florence. Turned in 1499, and killed in 1501 by men who followed the rule of Pope Alexander VI. Christians.” She scoffs. Erin’s jaw drops, but Holtzmann shakes her head. 

“So that’s why you came back as a Ghost? You have unfinished business?” The Ghost laughs.

“What else could I come back as? I was already dead before I was killed. The only thing keeping me alive was the blood of those who lived. When they stabbed me through my heart, I had nothing left. I was suddenly...this.” 

“And what? You’ve been hurting innocent people for hundreds of years?” 

“No. I have been peaceful. But I was asked by my creator to carry out a task, which I have done.” 

“A task?” Erin says, frowning. Holtzmann bites her lip and looks up at the Ghost.

“Why did you do this to me?” She says softly. The Ghost suddenly leans forward, and Erin watches as it presses its hand against Holtzmann’s cheek, a look of guilt on its face as it sighs.

“That, I cannot answer, my child. Those answers you seek, you will find in Mexico.” Holtzmann steps back, her eyes widening in shock.

“Mexico? Where? Where in Mexico?” 

“There is a Temple. Ask around in Mexico City, and you will find it.” 

“But-.” There’s the sound of rumbling, and Erin feels her ears pop as the Ghost suddenly vanishes, disappearing almost in the blink of an eye as a gust of wind pushes both of the scientists back. Holtzmann looks around wildly.

“Wait!” She screams, but Erin knows it’s futile. The Ghost is gone.

“Dammit!” Holtzmann kicks her leg out, smashing it into the one undamaged sink on the wall, which break and shatters on the ground as Holtzmann grips her hair in frustration.

“Holtzmann, don’t!”

“Mexico? That’s all I got? Go to fucking Mexico?” Holtzmann growls. 

“Holtzmann-.”

“How the fuck am I supposed to even get to Mexico if I can’t go out into the sun?”

“Then we’ll go to Mexico.” Erin says simply. Holtzmann glares at her.

“No way.”

“Holtzmann, you know that’s the solution to this problem. I come with you to Mexico, I do the exploring during the day-.”

“While I sit on my ass in some stodgy Motel room and do nothing?” Holtzmann growls. Erin blinks.

“Exactly.” 

“Not funny.”

“I’m not joking.” Holtzmann freezes, shakes her head.

“No. Erin, we don’t even know what’s in Mexico-.”

“Holtzmann, we need answers. That Ghost gave us only one. Mexico. You know that’s where we have to go.” 

“Erin, I can’t. If you get hurt-.” Erin shakes her head and moves forward, her hand reaching out to grip Holtzmann’s elbow.

“You’re gonna be there to keep me safe. I believe in you. And I’m not stopping until we solve this once and for all. You hate this, you hate being this, and I can’t watch you suffer. So we both go. We both go to Mexico, we get the answers we need. We see if there’s a way to change you back.” Holtzmann looks up at her as she bites her lip, tears in her eyes.

“What if there isn’t a cure? What if I’m stuck like this forever?” She whispers. Erin swallows the lump in her throat.

“There’s a cure for everything. We’ll find it. I promise.”

**********************************************

“I’m coming with you.” 

Abby’s already making her way toward the stairs, as if she’s seconds away from packing a bag before there’s a gush of wind and Holtzmann is standing in front of her, blocking her way to the stairs.

“No. Agreeing to let Erin come with me was a stretch, I’m not endangering all of you.” 

“Holtzmann, you’re my best friend!” Abby exclaims. Holtzmann sighs and grips Abby’s shoulder.

“You’re my best friend, too. Which is exactly why I can’t let you do this. Put yourself in danger for me.”

“You’re letting Erin go!”

“That’s because Erin is as stubborn as leather and will probably end up following me the second I leave.” Holtzmann deadpans, and Erin shrugs.

“Probably.”

Abby sighs and takes her glasses off, cleaning them on her shirt.

“Holtz, we can’t stand back and do nothing-.”

“You won’t be. You and Patty will be staying here, to keep the Ghosts that are still haunting New York from hurting anyone.” Holtzmann says, smiling. Erin looks over at Patty, who is sitting at the kitchen table with a frown, not even paying attention to the conversation. 

“And how do we explain your absence?” Abby says. Holtzmann shrugs.

“Tell ‘em I had a family emergency back home and Erin decided to come with me for...moral support.” Holtzmann finishes lamely. Erin sighs as Abby clears her throat and nods.

“Alright, fine. But I hate this.”

“I know. I do, too.”

“We’re not leaving yet, anyway. We have to pack, and get everything sorted. We need to rent a car. I need to rest.” Erin says, rubbing her eyes tiredly. She looks up at the clock. It’s almost midnight. 

“We’ll leave first thing tomorrow evening?” Holtzmann says, looking at Erin, who yawns and nods.

“Yeah.” 

“Go get some rest. I’ll spend the rest of tonight and tomorrow morning preparing some weapons for you guys while I’m gone, alright?” 

“Don’t you need sleep, too?” Patty asks, and Erin looks at her to see her staring at Holtzmann fondly. Holtzmann looks down at the ground and kicks her foot, shoving her hands into her pockets.

“I...I can’t sleep anymore.” She mumbles. Patty frowns and Erin sighs.

“Vampire thing.” She says simply. Patty rubs her forehead, scoffing in disbelief as she stands.

“I’m going to bed, my damn head hurts after all this shit.” She doesn’t even look at Holtzmann, who moves out of the way as Patty heads up the stairs. Abby sighs and suddenly wraps her arms around Holtzmann in a tight hug.

“Don’t make too much noise, if you interrupt with my sleep, I’ll kill you.” Holtzmann chuckles and claps Abby’s back.

“Noted.” She makes her way up the stairs, and Erin yawns again, unable to stifle it as Holtzmann suddenly rushes forward and begins shoving Erin’s back.

“Come on. Bed.”

“Ow! Holtz!”

“No excuses! Bed!” She keeps pushing her gently, and Erin chuckles as she makes her way up the stairs, Holtzmann still lightly prodding her in the back as she reaches her door and opens it. She looks at Holtzmann with a tired smile, and Holtzmann crosses her arms over her chest and leans against her door.

“Sleep. We’ve got a rough couple of days ahead.” Erin nods once, and Holtzmann chuckles before she suddenly leans in and brushes her lips against Erin’s cheek.

“Goodnight, Erin.” She whispers. She disappears in the blink of an eye, leaving a bewildered Erin standing there in shock, too awake and alert now to even think about falling asleep. 

**************************************

“Holtzmann?” 

She jumps at the sound of her name and looks at the top of the stairs to see Kevin looking at her with a frown. She raises an eyebrow and looks at the clock on the wall.

“It’s three in the morning, Kev. Late night?”

“I could say the same for you!” He slurs, suddenly walking toward her, stumbling as he does, and Holtzmann sighs.

He’s drunk. She can smell the alcohol on him from here.

“Didn’t take you for much of a drinker, Kev. Being all organic and spiritual and what not?” Kevin sighs and flops down in a seat, his smile and his boyish charm suddenly disappearing as he pouts.

“Mike Hat died.” Holtzmann drops her tools onto the table, her heart genuinely aching as Kevin lets out a big sigh.

“I’m sorry, Kev. Losing a pet sucks.” She reaches out to him, patting his shoulder gently and he nods.

“Yeah. But he was old. He was almost seventeen, you know. Which is like...two hundred in dog years, I think.” Holtzmann winces, but simply nods encouragingly as he rubs his eyes.

“He was a good dog.” Holtzmann nods, and Kevin stands stumbling as he does.

“I should sleep this off.”

“You should.” Holtzmann agrees. He grins and gives her a two fingered salute, and she chuckles, can’t help but return a two fingered salute to him as he stumbles and reaches out to grab the table to steady himself.

“Ow, damn!”

The scent hits her. 

It takes over her mind, invades her senses.

She’s shaking with the effort. She’s gripping the screwdriver in her hand so tightly, she’s positive she’s marking dents into it as Kevin whines.

“Ah, man. Holtz, I cut my hand on one of your tool thingies, can you pass me a rag?” 

Holtzmann doesn’t want to move. She’s afraid of what she’ll do.

_I can’t hurt Kevin, god, I can’t hurt him, please, not him, anyone but him-_

“Holtz?” He reaches out, his hand touching her elbow, and Holtzmann grabs his wrist. He whines, and Holtzmann turns his palm up to face her.

There’s a gash, clean through his palm, blood trickling down the sides of his hands. She looks up at him, and his eyes are half closed.

He’s on the verge of passing out. From the blood, or the alcohol, she isn’t sure.

Kevin is her friend. No, no, she can't do this-

“I hope you’re drunk enough not to remember this.” She leans down, her teeth already piercing her gums, making her wince. She looks at the cut. It seems pretty bad, it may need stitches-

Holtzmann claps a hand to her forehead.

She’s an idiot. Why didn’t she think of this before?

She's not going to kill him. She doesn't have to.

_You can do this Holtzmann, come on!_

She grabs Kevin's arm and puts it over her neck as she drags him up to his room with ease and desperation. She doesn’t breathe, choosing to only inhale through her mouth in short spurts so she doesn't catch the scent of blood as she practically kicks his door down and carries him into his room. She throws him down onto the bed, and he groans. 

“Dark. I don’t like the dark. Lamp.” He whines, and Holtzmann raises an eyebrow and clicks the lamp on his bedside table on. Light floods the room, and she sees him smile.

“Better.” Holtzmann runs out of the room as fast as she can, and as soon as she's downstairs and away from the scent of Kevin's blood, she realizes what she just did.

She managed to stop herself from killing Kevin.

And he was afraid of the dark.

“Kevin Beckman, a man who looks like he could kill someone with his bare hands is afraid of the dark. You’re an enigma, Kev.” She says to herself, chuckling. 

She didn't kill him.

She feels tears prick her eyes, hope coursing through her for the first time in days and she sets herself up straight and nods, a new plan forming in her mind as she exits the Firehouse and makes her way to the nearest Hospital. 

*************************************************

Erin groans and rolls over in her bed, slamming her hand down onto the alarm that’s currently blaring loudly and it goes silent as she brings her arm up to rest over her eyes.

“Erin, I’d love to let you keep sleeping, but you’ve pressed snooze on that thing a total of twenty four times and it’s almost 11.” 

She gasps and jumps up, eyes looking wildly around the room and they land on Holtzmann, who chuckles, a grin on her face. 

“Wha-.”

“The sun is up, which means I can’t go out and grab a car for us to rent. I’m all packed, but you are not.” Erin sits up, looks at Holtzmann, who looks happier than Erin has seen her in days.

“You look-.”

“Ecstatic? Over the moon?” She finishes, grinning. Erin chuckles as she throws the covers off herself.

“Yeah, actually.” Holtzmann grins, an excited glint in her eyes.

“I found a way to drink blood without hurting anyone.” Erin’s eyes widen.

“You did?”

“Yup. Blood bags.” Erin says, grinning proudly. Erin blinks in shock before she claps a hand to her forehead.

“Ugh, blood bags! Why didn’t we think of that before?” She exclaims.

“I know!” Holtzmann says, chuckling. Erin shakes her head.

“Unbelievable.”

“There’s something else, too. Kevin came home really late last night, and he cut his hand open on one of my tools and Erin...I didn’t attack him.” Holtzmann says breathlessly. Erin looks at her in shock.

“You-.”

“I mean I had the urge to kill him, god I wanted to, but I just...I didn’t! I kept my cool! I just kept thinking about how much he meant to me and I stopped myself! Erin...” Holtzmann steps forward, tears in her eyes as she grips Erin’s hands in her own.

“I think I might be able to do this. If we can’t find a cure...I can live like this. I won’t hurt anyone ever again.” She whispers. Erin feels her heart pounding as she grabs Holtzmann and embraces her, and Holtzmann buries her head into Erin’s shoulder, squeezing her waist before she lets her go.

“ERIN! BREAKFAST!” Abby yells.

“Coming!” Erin shouts back. Holtzmann smiles as Erin interlaces their fingers and makes her way down the stairs, before suddenly Abby appears at the bottom and holds a hand up.

“Kevin’s bleeding, Holtz, it’s maybe not a good idea for you to be down here.” 

“His hand is bleeding again?” Holtzmann says, frowning. Abby raises an eyebrow.

“Uh, yeah-.”

“He cut his hand last night on one of my tools.” Holtzmann says. Abby looks at her in shock and Holtzmann smiles.

“I didn’t hurt him. It took a hell of a lot of strength but...I did it. And, I may have figured out a way to get blood without hurting anyone.” Abby crosses her arms over her chest.

“Do tell.”

“Keep running it under water, baby!” Patty yells as she rounds the corner, and she comes to a stop behind Abby, a look of concern on her face.

“You didn’t do that, did you?” She says, pointing back into the kitchen at Kevin and looking at Holtzmann accusatorily. Holtzmann glares at her.

“No, he cut his hand on one of my tools, and I managed not to kill him, which I think is a pretty big deal, thank you.” Patty rolls her eyes, and Holtzmann sighs.

“As I was saying, I found a way to get blood without hurting anyone. Blood bags.”

“From the Hospital?” Abby says, frowning, and Holtzmann grins.

“Yeah! That way I don’t hurt anyone-.”

“And instead, you take blood that could be used to save people from dying. Nice job.” Patty deadpans, and Holtzmann’s expression turns stony.

“Is it not better than actually killing people?”

“It’s essentially the same thing, I think.” Patty says coldly. Holtzmann scoffs in disbelief.

“I can’t win with you.”

“Nope.”

“ENOUGH!” Erin can’t help the outburst of anger, and she glares at the both of them before looking at Abby.

“I don’t know about you, but I’ve had enough of this! Patty, Holtzmann is trying here! For god’s sake, she is trying and you aren’t even giving her a chance! She didn’t choose this! She’s a victim just as much as those people she killed and if you don’t open your goddamn eyes and see that, then you’re not the friend we all thought you were!” Patty’s eyes widen in shock before Erin turns on Holtzmann.

“And you! You know Patty is religious and you know that this is a big thing for her to grasp! So try and understand why she’s acting this way instead of attacking her all the time!” They both open their mouths to argue, and Erin raises a finger to silence them both.

“No! I’m leaving to find a car for us to rent and when I get back, I better not see that you two are still fighting or I swear I will tie you both back to back to a chair until you sort it out! We are not leaving for Mexico in this state!” And with that, she turns on her heel and storms back up the stairs, quickly shoves on the nearest clothes she can find and storms out of the Firehouse, with Patty, Abby and Holtzmann all still at the bottom of the stairs by the time she comes back down, staring at her in shock.

********************************************

Erin pulls up to the curb of the Firehouse with a sigh, watching the sun sink down over the horizon. She managed to find a car for a decent amount of money, the windows tinted dark black, but she’s still not sure if it’ll be enough to keep Holtzmann safe. It’s something they’ll have to test out tomorrow morning when the sun rises. 

She exits the car, presses down on the button to lock it and takes a deep breath in as she enters the Firehouse.

It’s silent, and she walks forward cautiously, sees Kevin at reception, who grins at her.

“Hey, Erin. The Mayor’s assistant is in a meeting with the other girls at the moment, she wants to see you, too.” Erin’s heart drops.

“O-Okay. How’s the hand?” She asks, pointing at his bandaged hand. He sighs.

“Getting there.” She nods, smiles at him once more before making her way into the living room.

Jennifer Lynch is seated with Abby, Patty and Holtzmann, all of whom look up as she enters.

“Finally. I’ve just been informed that you and Dr. Holtzmann are leaving for a short amount of time and need some money to do so.” Erin looks at the others with a frown, and Abby nods behind Jennifer’s back.

“Uh, yeah. Family emergency.” Erin says. Jennifer sighs.

“Yes, she’s told me the reason, what she hasn’t told me is how long for and why you need the money.” She says, glaring at Holtzmann, who shrugs.

“I told you. We don’t know how long for. And that’s why we need the money. You pay us after all, and if we aren’t doing our job while we’re away, well...” Jennifer rolls her eyes and stands.

“Fine. Try and keep it at least under a week or two, please. Or else rumors will begin to spread that you’re breaking up or something, and the Mayor does NOT need to deal with that. How much do you need?” She suddenly reaches into her bag and Holtzmann’s eyes widen.

“Uh, we’re gonna be staying at a few Motels, so...” Jennifer freezes, looks between Erin and Holtzmann, and sighs.

“Well, now I get it.” Erin looks at her in confusion before she suddenly pulls out a wad of cash.

“Stay in cheap Motels, I’m only giving you $1000.” She tosses it at Holtzmann, who looks down at it in shock.

“Th-That’s more than enough, thank you.” She points at Holtzmann threateningly.

“Less than a week or two. Or you’ll have hell to pay.” She glares at all of them as she straightens out and begins to walk past Erin before she stops and looks back.

“Oh, and Dr. Holtzmann? The new look? Keep it. Screams more ‘badass’ then ‘mad scientist who might kill us all’.” Holtzmann scoffs as Jennifer grins and walks away, and as soon as they hear the echo of the door shutting behind her, Holtzmann chuckles.

“Bet you she wouldn’t say that if she knew what else came with this look.” She mutters.

“I got us a car.” Erin says abruptly. Holtzmann looks up at her and nods.

“I packed for you.” Erin’s eyes widen in shock and Holtzmann points at the two small suitcases at the bottom of the stairs.

“I...thank you.” Holtzmann simply nods.

“Our passports are in there and everything. Hopefully we can pass the border without any trouble.” 

“Y’all are gonna be driving for at least three or four days, just...try and get some rest. Especially you.” Patty says, pointing at Erin, who nods.

“We’ll stop at Motels. I promise.” Abby nods, and Erin looks out of the window as the sun officially sets.

“Time to go, I guess.” Holtzmann stands, and Erin crosses her arms over her chest and looks between Patty and Holtzmann.

“I believe I had conditions before we leave.” Holtzmann sighs and Patty rolls her eyes.

“Erin-.”

“Nope. Hug it out.” Holtzmann bites down her lip, looks up at Patty, and holds her arms out. Patty glares at her, then reaches out and wraps her in an awkward embrace. As Holtzmann reaches out and pats her back, Erin sees Patty sigh and suddenly, all hatred and tension is gone from her face as she hugs Holtzmann close, and Erin hears Holtzmann sniff as she hugs Patty back just as tightly. 

“Don’t go getting in trouble. Both of you.” She says gruffly, and Holtzmann nods against her shoulder. Erin hugs Abby tightly, and Abby sighs and pats Erin’s back.

“Keep yourself safe.”

“I will.” 

“You too.” Abby says, reaching out for Holtzmann. Erin hugs Patty, who leans in and whispers in her ear.

“Keep her safe, too.”

“I will.” Erin whispers back. They let go, and Kevin makes his way over to them.

“Have a safe trip guys.” He grabs them both and pulls them into a bone crushing hug, and Holtzmann chuckles.

“We still gotta finish that theme song, Kev.”

“You got it boss.” He grins. He makes his way over to their suitcases.

“I got mine, Kev. Can you grab Erin’s?” Holtzmann asks.

“No problem! Only got one hand anyway.” He laughs and lifts Erin’s suitcase with one hand, and Holtzmann grabs her own suitcase. Erin raises an eyebrow and she sighs.

“There’s a small cooler in there with blood bags, it’s heavy.” Erin’s eyes widen. 

“And if they decide to search our bags at the border?” She hisses. Holtzmann shakes her head.

“They’ll be gone by then. I only put in a few. I’ve got it sorted, don’t worry.” Erin bites her lip and hesitates and Holtzmann winks at her.

“Trust me.” Erin rolls her eyes, but nods as she makes her way out of the Firehouse, Abby and Patty tailing them. 

“This car?” Kevin asks, pointing at Erin’s rental, and she nods, pulls out the key and presses down on the button to unlock it. She opens the driver’s seat and pops open the boot, and the car sinks as Kevin loads up her suitcase and Holtzmann loads up hers. 

“Safe trip guys!” Kevin says, waving at Erin from the side view mirror. She waves back, about to settle in the driver’s seat when Holtzmann suddenly appears at the door and shakes her head.

“I’ll drive. Rhythm of the night and what not.” She says, pointing up at the now light blue sky. Erin chuckles and jumps out, making her way to the passenger seat, exchanging one last glance with Abby, Patty and Kevin.

“We’ll call every day.”

“You better.” Abby says. Erin grins and opens the door, settling into the passenger seat as Holtzmann waves at the others before turning the car on and pushing the handbrake down.

“Now...” Erin says, and Holtzmann looks at her and nods.

“Let’s go down to Mexico City where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> now would you look at that! a roadtrip au inside a vampire au! :D


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm so sorry for the fact that this update has taken forever AND the fact that it's a filler chapter, but I promise this will pick up soon!

Seven hours later and non-stop driving (apart from gas stops), Holtzmann finally passes the sign heading into Roanoke, Virginia. She looks over at Erin, who has slowly been dozing off for the last hour, and makes a decision.

“Motel?” She asks. Erin jumps a little in shock from the sound of Holtzmann’s voice, and her eyes widen.

“What? No, I’m fine.”

“Erin, I know I can’t sleep, but you can, and you need to. I’ll be damned if I’m gonna let you sleep inside a cramped car instead of a stuffy mattress at a cheap Motel.” Holtzmann throws her a grin, and Erin chuckles.

“But if we’re gonna reach Mexico-.”

“Mexico isn’t going anywhere. Besides, how are you gonna take over driving duties during the day if you’re half asleep?” Holtzmann asks. Erin shakes her head.

“No, we can’t drive during the day. I know the windows are tinted, but we don’t know that it won’t burn you.” Holtzmann shrugs.

“We’ll test it out tomorrow morning. If it works, it works, if not, I’ll jump in the boot.”

“Holtzmann!” 

“Or, we’ll wait till the sun sets again! Either way, we’re stopping at a Motel, Erin.” 

“Nothing I say is going to change your mind, is it?”

“Nope.” Erin rolls her eyes, but finally sinks down into her seat with a yawn.

“Fine.” She manages to muffle out, and Holtzmann grins.

“Look up nearby Motels.”

“Where are we, anyway?” Holtzmann grins and clears her throat before announcing in her best spooky voice.

“Roanoke.” She cackles, and Erin rolls her eyes.

“We’re never letting you watch American Horror Story again.”

“Why? Because I am an American Horror Story now?” She says, and even though Erin know she’s joking, she sees a twinge of sadness in her eyes, and she doesn’t know what compels her to do it, but she reaches out and grabs Holtzmann’s hand lightly.

“Hey...we’re gonna find a cure.” Holtzmann bites her lip and simply nods.

“Yeah...yeah, sure.” It’s not all that convincing, but Erin decides not to push the matter as Holtzmann suddenly lets out a gasp.

“Ah, well! There we go!” She points off to the side of the road, and Erin looks up to see a high sign flashing neon red with the word “Motel” blinking in and out of focus, and she sighs.

This is going to be an uncomfortable night.

Holtzmann pulls off the road, dirt flying off the tires as she navigates through the gravel and into the carpark. There’s a few cars here and there, but Erin can’t help the shiver that runs up her spine when she gets out of the car, and Holtzmann raises an eyebrow at her.

“You okay?”

“Motels always creep me out. They’re always the hotspot in horror movies.” She says, shuddering. Holtzmann chuckles.

“Well, I’m pretty sure no one’s gonna mess with us.” 

“Why is that?” 

“I’ll eat them if they do.” Erin chuckles, but when Holtzmann doesn’t laugh, she looks up to see the Engineer isn’t joking, a threatening look in her eyes that makes the hair on the back of Erin’s neck stand up. 

“Uh, do we...do we know if they have any openings?” Erin says, trying to change the subject. Holtzmann shrugs.

“Let’s find out.” She opens the boot of the car and takes out their two suitcases with ease. Erin grabs the handle of hers and lifts it up, dragging it onto the sidewalk and up toward the two glass doors of the Motel. She opens it and enters the main lobby, Holtzmann trailing behind her as they look up to see an older lady reading a magazine at the front desk, reading glasses propped on her nose. She looks up at the sound of the door opening, and to their surprise, she smiles widely and puts the book down, standing up with a grin.

“Hello ladies! What can I do you for?” Erin returns her smile and comes to a stop in front of her.

“We’re looking for a room?”

“Just for tonight?”

“Yes, please.” 

“No problem, sweetheart. Two beds or one?” 

“Uh...”

“Either, it’s fine.” Holtzmann says from behind Erin, who turns to look at her in shock as the woman nods and turns to the keys behind her.

“Room 24! It’s got two beds, we’ve got a TV as well, reception might be a big dodgy, though.”

“That’s fine. How much?”

“Usually $100, but considering how late it is and the fact that you’re only staying one night, I’ll bump it down to $75.” The woman smiles warmly, and Erin returns it with gratitude.

“Thank you so much!”

“That’s alright, dear. There you go.” She hands Erin the key as she pulls a hundred dollar bill from her wallet and hands it to her. As soon as she goes to pass the change to Erin, Holtzmann swoops in and takes it.

“Getting snacks!” She says, grinning as she drags her suitcase along.

“Vending machine is just done the hall, sweetheart!” The woman says, chuckling. Holtzmann simply waves her hand in response as Erin rolls her eyes and drags her suitcase to Room 24.

As soon as she enters, the smell of mothballs hits her, and she sighs, dragging her suitcase inside and resting it against the wall. She flops down onto the nearest bed and simply stares up at the ceiling, fatigue already beginning to settle in as the door opens and Holtzmann makes her way in, carrying her suitcase and a bunch of chips in her arms.

“Holtzmann, you don’t eat human food.”

“I know. But you do.” She drops the chips down on Erin’s bed and Erin sighs.

“I need to get proper food in me tomorrow.”

“Of course.” Holtzmann mumbles, setting her suitcase down on the ground and opening it as she kicks her leg out and shuts the door behind her. She throws open the suitcase and immediately reaches for the cooler. She glances up at Erin, who looks at her in anticipation.

“I’d rather you...not watch.” She mutters. Erin sighs and nods, stands and walks over to her suitcase, grabbing her pajamas from it and walking into the bathroom. Holtzmann avoids eye contact with her as she does, and as soon as Erin enters the bathroom, she can’t help but sink against the door.

For all the little moments where Holtzmann seems like Holtzmann again, there’s moments like these, where the reality of their situation sinks in.

They’re going to Mexico to find the answers and possibly a cure for Holtzmann being a Vampire.

An actual Vampire. 

First Ghosts and Vortexes, and now Vampires.

How much more is she supposed to take? 

She forces herself to stand, gripping the sink for support as she strips her clothing off herself and decides that she may as well hop into the shower while she’s here, giving Holtzmann more time to...

“Drink blood.” Erin mutters under her breath. She sighs and turns the tap for the shower, cringes when she realizes there’s no hot water, and immediately shivers as soon as she’s under the cold barrage of water. 

She bathes as fast as she can, the water making her teeth chatter as she lathers the bar of soap provided by the Motel over her body quickly. As soon as she shuts the water off, she shivers and reaches for a towel.

“Hey Holtz!”

“Yeah?”

“Just warning you, there’s no hot water.” 

“Okay!” Erin quickly dries herself off and changes into her pajamas, which consist of short shorts and a tank top. She sighs.

She packed for Mexico, not freezing cold water in Virginia.

She’s about to leave the bathroom when she pauses with her hand on the doorknob.

“Um...Holtz? Can I come out?” Erin asks cautiously. She hears the sound of something snapping shut.

“Yeah, I’m done.” Erin takes a deep breath in and exits the bathroom, her eyes immediately falling on Holtzmann, whose lips are red with blood, which she licks away before turning away from Erin and grabbing her own clothes. She disappears into the bathroom without a word and Erin feels goosebumps erupt over her body, and not from the cold. 

She makes her way over to her bed and quickly gets under the covers in an attempt to get warm. 

She’s almost dozed off to sleep when the door to the bathroom opens and she’s jolted out of her sleep. She turns in her bed and the breath she takes catches in her throat.  
Holtzmann is in only her bra and underwear, which are of the red lacy kind, her porcelain skin on full display as she runs a towel through her damp hair. She looks at Erin and sighs.

“I can’t feel temperatures.” She says dully. Erin sits up.

“Wh-What do you mean?” She frowns. 

“You told me there was no hot water? The water was lukewarm to me. I turned only the cold water tap on, and still. Nothing. Lukewarm, not even remotely freezing cold.”

“Come here.” Holtzmann sighs and makes her way over to Erin, who reaches out, fingers grazing against Holtzmann’s hand.

“You don’t feel different.” She whispers, trying to stop her eyes from falling anywhere down to Holtzmann’s body. Holtzmann sighs.

“I don’t know. Maybe it’s another bullshit side effect.” She pulls her hand away from Erin’s grip and makes her way over to her own bed, laying on top of it, her body on full display and Erin can feel the heat rising in her cheeks. She clears her throat and turns over, facing away from the Engineer.

“Erin?”

“Yeah?”

“Why is your heart racing?” Erin bites down on her lip.

“I...you-.”

“I can hear it, yeah. Are you okay?” Holtzmann sounds genuinely concerned, but Erin still doesn’t turn to face her, embarrassment rushing through her in a tidal wave.

“Yeah, just worried about Mexico. It’s fine. Night Holtzmann.” She croaks out.

“Oh, okay...Night.” Holtzmann doesn’t press the issue, which Erin is thankful for, and she closes her eyes, trying her best to simply fall asleep, trying her best to ignore that Holtzmann is half naked in the bed beside her and all she can think about doing is touching her...making all her worries and her problems disappear, even just for a second...

“Erin?”

“Yeah?” She whispers.

“Thank you. For coming with me, and for not seeing me as a monster, and...for everything.” 

There’s silence between them for a few moments before Erin finally manages to speak up.

“Any time.” She hears Holtzmann chuckle, and Erin smiles as she finally closes her eyes and drifts off to sleep.

******************************

The sun’s beginning to rise and Holtzmann feels the familiar burning on her skin as the sun breaks through the curtains and hits her. She hisses and dashes up off her bed and onto the other side of the room where the sun hasn’t quite hit yet.

She sighs and looks up at the TV, which is showing a re-run of Family Feud, then down at the remote, which is still stuck in the sun.

She looks over at Erin, who is still fast asleep, her face peaceful and soft, and she stares for a few moments before a decision slowly begins to form in her mind.

She needs to find out if the car blocks the sun from hurting her.

Erin’s gonna kill her.

She reaches for the a TV shirt in her suitcase, throws it on unceremoniously before yanking on a pair of jeans, trying her best not to make too much noise as she keeps throwing furtive glances at Erin, who simply stirs slightly in her sleep, but continues dreaming. Holtzmann reaches for the keys to the car, which are resting on the table underneath the TV, and heads to the door. She takes a few deep breaths in.

She’s about to be in a lot of pain.

She grits her teeth, throws the door open, then dashes out.

The sun hits her, and she bites back a yelp of pain at the blistering feeling of her skin burning on her back, and as soon as she enters the shade of a column, she waits a few seconds, breathing deeply as her wounds slowly begin to heal.

She looks down at the raw redness of her skin, the blisters healing over. 

She grits her teeth, then runs straight toward the lobby, a groan escaping her from the pain as she throws the glass door open and enters the lobby.

She catches her breath, sinking into the shadows. She peeks a glance at the receptionist area to see it’s empty.

Luck is on her side, apparently.

She makes her way over to the front of the Motel, and groans when she realizes their car is parked almost on the far end of the Motel.

“Fuck.” She growls under her breath. She bites down on her lip, looks up at the sun, then lets out a bated breath.

She throws the door open and runs, but the pain that explodes throughout her body forces her down to her knees. She can’t bite back the scream building in her throat, her eyes blurring as she cries, and she knows she can’t make it, and she’s gambling her life because there’s every possibility that the car won’t protect her-

Arms wrap around her waist and drag her, and the keys in her hand are snatched from her as she hears the car unlock, the gravel under her feet dragging as the car door is thrown open and she’s shoved in the backseat. 

The door slams and she crouches down into the bottom of the car, groaning as the pain slowly begins to dissipate.

“What the fuck were you thinking?” 

The sound is muffled, and she turns, eyes blurring and her head pounding to see Erin at the window, her face furious as she points at Holtzmann with her index finger.

“Stay there or I swear to god I will kill you!” Holtzmann manages to give her a thumbs up, and Erin’s walking away, the sound of her feet stomping on the ground growing quieter and quieter the further away she gets. Holtzmann groans, looks up at the sun, which is facing right at her, but not burning her.

The car’s windows are tinted enough to protect her.

She sinks against the backseat, trying her best to breathe as she waits.

And waits.

And waits.

The sun has completely risen over the horizon by the time she hears the sound of footsteps and Erin is dragging their suitcases along, a look of pure fury written on her face. She opens the boot to the car, and Holtzmann grunts as she throws them into the boot before shutting it with immense force, causing the whole car to wobble as she moves to the driver’s seat. She enters the car, shuts the door behind her, and simply sits there, gripping the steering wheel, breathing loudly as Holtzmann groans and looks up at her.

“Er-.”

“Shut up.” She growls. Holtzmann snaps her mouth shut and looks up at the ceiling of the car. 

“You said we were doing this together.” Holtzmann looks at Erin in shock at the sound of her voice, shaky and almost pleading as tears well in her eyes, a look of pure sadness on her face as she looks at Holtzmann.

“We are-.”

“Then why were you leaving?” She whispers. Holtzmann sits up with a groan and shakes her head.

“I wasn’t leaving, Erin, I was just...I wanted to see if the car would protect me from the sun.” She mumbles. Erin freezes, her hands gripping the steering wheel so tightly, her knuckles turn white.

“You couldn’t wait for me to wake up?” She growls, and her sadness is gone now, replaced with anger. Holtzmann shrugs.

“I figured I’d save time-.”

“You are unbelievable!” Erin screams, slamming her hands onto the steering wheel, and Holtzmann sighs.

“Can we just...drive? Please?” She lays back against the backseat, trying to breathe deeply as her wounds heal, and Erin glares at her.

“I have half a mind to turn this car back to New York.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t do that again. Please.”

“I won’t.”

**********************************

For almost four hours, they’re both silent, Holtzmann still in the backseat as they pass the sign that says they’ve entered Knoxville, Tennesse. Erin has been driving the entire time without even looking at Holtzmann, only stopping once for gas, which she did in silence. Holtzmann figures she should probably attempt conversation with her, but every time she tries, fear grips her and she stops short.

She isn’t even sure why she’s so frightened, she’s never been one to shy away from conversation. She knows she should apologize, but-

“Were you hoping it’d end?” Holtzmann almost jumps out of her skin when Erin finally speaks up, looking into the rearview mirror at her with curious eyes, and Holtzmann looks at her in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“When you stepped out into the sun? Were you seriously just wanting to see if the car would protect you? Or did you want to end it?”

Erin says it with all the seriousness and despair Holtzmann has ever heard in a human voice.

And when she finds she can’t seem to answer, Erin suddenly grips the steering wheel tighter.

“You can’t think that.”

“Erin-.”

“Holtzmann, you don’t understand, do you? How much you mean to us? To Abby, and Patty? To me?” 

“I was-.”

“You can’t do that. We’re going to figure this out, and you can’t do that, you can’t-.” Erin’s voice is quavering, her words coming out jumbled and confused and Holtzmann reaches out, gripping her shoulder tightly.

“I’m sorry.” She whispers softly. 

“I can’t lose you, okay?” The words break Holtzmann’s heart, the way they escape Erin’s mouth in a hoarse whisper that cracks, the way her hands tighten on the wheel and the way she bites down on her lip to stop the tears from falling. Holtzmann nods.

“You won’t.” 

“No, I...if we get to Mexico and you find your people or whatever, and you leave-.”

“Erin, wait. That’s not gonna happen.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do. I’m not going anywhere, I’m not...I’m not leaving you.” She mumbles the last few words, ignores Erin’s little gasp of shock and sinks back against the backseat, her heart pounding as Erin takes a deep breath and looks at her in the rearview mirror.

“Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again i'm sorry that this is short and a filler, but i didn't want to leave you guys with nothing, especially considering i haven't updated in ages so yeah! I promise it'll pick you!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is long to make up for the last one, and it's kinda a filler in the beginning but then it picks up at the end! Your comments are honestly so sweet and I'm so glad you're all enjoying this! I'm sorry the updates are slow, but y'know, Christmas and what not! Also this might have a lot of grammatical and spelling errors, I've been writing all night and it's like six in the morning right now so forgive me!

They reach Laurel, Mississippi at around two in the afternoon, the sky high above them and Holtzmann sinks into the backseat, trying to avoid the sunlight filtering through the window. Although the black tint helps stop the sun from burning her, it’s still not exactly comfortable. Her skin feels itchy all over, and she resists the urge to scratch at it as Erin suddenly pulls over into a gas station, groaning as she stretches slightly in her seat and Holtzmann sighs.

“Let me drive.” Erin grips the steering wheel and shakes her head.

“I’ve got it.”

“Erin, can you stop being stubborn?” Holtzmann sighs. Erin looks behind her, eyes observing the Engineer in the backseat before she finally purses her lips and nods.

“Fine. I’ll fill the car up, you jump into the driver’s seat as soon as I shut the door.” Holtzmann nods, and Erin throws the door open and shuts it swiftly behind her as she gets out. 

She stretches once she’s outside, wincing as she does before moving around the car to where the gas pump is.

Holtzmann sighs and awkwardly moves into the front seat, hands gripping the steering wheel as she adjusts herself. Erin begins filling the car with gas, the sound of the nozzle loud and echoing in Holtzmann’s mind as she adjusts herself to avoid the sun when a sudden tapping noise makes her jump. She looks up, sees a young man tapping on her window, and her heart drops.

“Hey, can I ask ya somethin’?” The man says, his voice muffled by the closed window and he points down, indicating he wants her to wind her window down. Holtzmann looks up at the sun, which is bearing down on her, and shakes her head. The man frowns.

“Just want a chat! Two seconds!” Holtzmann growls under her breath, wanting nothing more than for this guy to just leave her alone when the car jolts and Holtzmann sees Erin appear around the corner from the side-view mirror.

“Is there a problem?” Holtzmann hears her ask. The guy turns to look at her, and he shrugs.

“Just wanted a chat is all-.”

“We just came to fill up, alright? We’re leaving.” Erin’s voice is surprisingly strong, and Holtzmann stares in slight shock as she moves to the passenger seat of the car and jumps in, and the guy simply shrugs and walks away. Holtzmann whistles as Erin shuts the door beside her.

“Didn’t know you had that in you.”

“Just drive.” 

“Yes, ma’am.”

*****************************************************

They’ve reached Lafayette, Louisiana by the time the sun sets, and Holtzmann turns to see Erin still fast asleep in the passenger seat, her body curled up to the side. She had crashed out about two hours earlier, and Holtzmann had found it hard not to stare, her eyes firmly on the road as she concentrated on the music coming from the radio to distract her.

It’s no secret to any of the Ghostbusters that Holtzmann was a flirt. Before this entire disaster happened, Holtzmann always found that flirting was a substitute for her lack of confidence, and that the more she did it in a joking matter, the less likely she was to get shot down.

It wasn’t any different with Erin.

Well, not at first.

Holtzmann’s not one to admit her feelings or confess to anything that could potentially break her heart, but there was something about Erin that she couldn’t quite put her finger on. The chemistry between them was something Holtzmann couldn’t explain, and despite the fact that there were days where Holtzmann wondered what it would be like to touch Erin, to kiss her, to hold her, to love her, she can’t stand the possibility of jeopardizing their friendship.

So it stays hidden, her never ending practice allowing her to perfect the skill of pushing down unwanted feelings and allowing herself to just be.

But now? Everything was so different. Now all she can think about is finding a cure, finding a way to fix this, to fix herself. But it can never go back to how it was. She still killed two people. She still hurt people, did terrible things-

“Holtz?” She jumps a little in her seat and turns as Erin stirs and blinks rapidly before looking at her.

“What time is it?”

“About a quarter past five. You okay?” Erin nods, yawning as she stretches and Holtzmann smiles.

We’re in Louisiana.” Erin’s eyes widen.

“Really?” Holtzmann nods, and Erin sighs. 

“Almost there then.”

“Almost. Another day’s drive, I reckon.” 

“Then we’ll have our answers.” Erin says firmly. Holtzmann grips the steering wheel tightly.

“Yeah...” She contemplates, decides she should, and speaks.

“Feel like having a bit of fun tonight?” Erin frowns.

“Holtzmann, we need to remember what we’re doing.”

“I know, but come on. We need to have a bit of fun at least.” Erin bites her lip, contemplating and Holtzmann rolls her eyes.

“Just one bar and a few drinks. It won’t kill us.” She still doesn’t respond, and Holtzmann reaches out, fingers brushing across the top of Erin’s knuckles, which are resting on her knees.

“We’ve been on the road for almost two days straight, Erin. You need a break.” 

“You don’t?” Holtzmann shrugs, and Erin sighs again.

“Alright, fine, yeah. We’ll stay here tonight, and then hopefully we can reach the border by tomorrow evening, in case they ask us to get out of the car. I won’t exactly know how to explain you burning up under the sun to the border patrol.” Holtzmann nods, impressed.

“Good thinking, Agent 99.” Erin rolls her eyes, but smiles. They’re silent for a few seconds before Erin clears her throat.

“You know, you’re starting to act like yourself again.” She says.

“I am?”

“Yeah. I mean, the clothes are still off, but...it’s good to know the Holtzmann I love is still in there somewhere.” Holtzmann’s heart pounds and she sucks in a breath. She looks at Erin, who turns bright red.

“I mean-.” Holtzmann reaches into her pocket and pulls out her phone hastily.

“You might uh, wanna call Abby and let her know we’re okay.” She blurts out. Erin’s eyes widen and she gasps.

“Shit, I forgot!” She exclaims, and Holtzmann chuckles with relief, glad that their awkward moment is all but forgotten already.

“Yeah, you did. Go on.” Erin hurriedly dials Abby’s number, and Holtzmann winces when Abby answers with a scream, her voice echoing loudly as she yells at Erin for not calling her sooner.

“I’m sorry, we’ve just been on the road for two days straight, and we’re exhausted!” Erin manages to yell over Abby. They talk for a short while, and Holtzmann’s pulling into a nearby Motel when Erin finally hangs up.

“Yeah, she’s mad.”

“She’ll get over it.” Holtzmann sighs and turns the car off as she jumps out, stretches with a groan, and sees Erin struggling to even stand. She dashes over to the passenger side and Erin looks up at her with a sigh.

“I’m cramping.” She hisses. Holtzmann chuckles and grips her elbows before hoisting her up, and Erin growls under her breath.

“Ow.” She hisses. Holtzmann grins as she stretches, whimpering in pain before she sighs.

“Yeah, I think we should go to a bar and have a few drinks.” Erin says. Holtzmann chuckles as they make their way to the Lobby and quickly rent a room for the night.

“The only one we’ve got left has got one bed, darlings.”

“That’s okay, we can share. You okay with that, Erin?” She turns to look at Erin, who is a lovely shade of scarlet as she nods.

“Y-Yeah, no problem!” She says, her voice an octave or two higher and Holtzmann frowns as the receptionist hands her their Room Key.

As soon as they enter the room and rest their suitcases inside, Holtzmann looks at Erin, who is looking at the bed with wide eyes.

“Erin, you can have the bed, I don’t sleep, remember?” Holtzmann says, trying her best to ignore the sadness creeping into her chest.

Erin doesn’t trust her anymore. It’s the only explanation for why she’s so afraid to even share a bed with her. And Holtzmann doesn’t blame her. If Erin had been turned into a bloodsucking monster overnight, Holtzmann probably wouldn’t want to share a bed with her, either.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, course. Now come on, let’s go get some drinks.” 

****************************************************

Holtzmann has never seen anyone this drunk before.

It’s beyond drunk now to possibility paralytic as Erin downs another shot of tequila and giggles, some of it spilling from her mouth and dripping onto her top.

“Oops!”

“Uh, Erin?”

“Shhh!” She holds up finger to Holtzmann’s lips, and Holtzmann can taste the alcohol on her finger as she sighs against it.

“Vampires and Ghosts exist, I’m allowed to cope by doing this!” Erin slurs so much, Holtzmann’s not sure she’s heard correctly when Erin groans and throws her head down into her arms before looking up at Holtzmann.

“Vampires exist.” She whispers. Holtzmann sighs, checks that no one is listening in to their conversation and leans in.

“They do.” She whispers back.

“You’re one of them.”

“I am.” Erin chokes on a sob.

“How did this happen?” She moans. Holtzmann closes her eyes, swallows the lump in her throat.

“I don’t know. But the sooner we get to Mexico, the sooner we’ll get...” She trails off, the sound of a heart pounding loudly behind her pulling her attention and she turns, following the noise to see a young girl walking across the bar as fast as possible, shooting furtive glances over her shoulder before throwing the door open and Holtzmann follows her gaze to see a tall, slightly muscular man observing her as he walks, a sly smirk on his face as he follows her.

“Answers.” Holtzmann finishes with a breath. She turns to Erin, who is passed out on the counter, and looks up at the bartender, who raises an eyebrow at her.

“I will be right back for her, I promise. Here.” She hands him the keys to their car, which he takes.

“For insurance. So you know I’ll be back. Don’t give her anymore.” He sighs, but nods, and Holtzmann throws one last hesitant glance at Erin before making her way to the door.

She lets out a breath as the hot air of Louisiana hits her, and sniffs as the scent of the woman hits her, the smell of wood and citrus, surprisingly. She follows it, hears the sound of a muffled scream about a block ahead of her, and runs.

She’s there in less than three seconds, and when she sees the man holding the woman against the wall of an alleyway with a knife at her throat as he reaches down and rips at her skirt, pulling it up viciously, a fury takes her over.

This one she won’t be upset about.

She runs into him, tackling him to the ground, and her teeth are sinking into his neck before he can even make a move, his grunt of surprise turning into a scream of pain as he grabs at her, trying to get her off, but she only digs her teeth in deeper, hot liquid pouring into her mouth and god, if this isn’t heaven, because she has been surviving on goddamn blood bags for two days now and that is nothing compared to this, compared to fresh and live and hot-

She pulls away, her stomach turning as she looks down to see his eyes are wide and glassy.

Dead.

She chokes back a sob, comes back to reality as the woman behind her whimpers.

“I won’t hurt you. Get out of here.” Her voice is low, a slight growl rumbling her words as the woman runs as fast as she can, her footsteps pounding on the concrete and she takes one last look at her recent victim before standing and wiping the tears from her eyes. 

_Erin._

***********************************************

Erin wakes up to a pounding headache and the taste of bile in the back of her throat. 

She groans, shoving her face further into her pillow, trying her best to go back to sleep where pain is non-existent, when she hears a chuckle behind her.

“I’d love to let you go back to sleep, but considering it’s almost noon, we should probably get going.” Erin blinks before pulling herself off the pillow and turning.

Holtzmann is leaning against the door in the shade from the sun that’s bearing down on Erin through the window, a tired smile on her face as she stares at Erin, who quickly realizes that there’s a soft breeze coming from the window and touching her bare skin-

Bare skin?

She blinks, looks down at her body on the bed, and almost throws up.

She’s completely naked, a blanket covering the lower half of her body.

“I tried to get you to put your clothes back on, but you refused, so then I tried to cover you up with the blanket, and you kept kicking it off, so...” Holtzmann chuckles again, and Erin groans.

“What happened last night?” She croaks out. She remembers entering the bar, remembers knocking back two shots of tequila-

“You drank. A lot. Told me you were attempting to cope with all the crazy stuff that’s happened. Then you passed out so I figured I’d bring you back here, and then you stripped and told me to come sleep with you-.”

“Oh my god...” Erin throws the pillow over her head, content to suffocate herself and die when she hears Holtzmann sigh behind her.

“Erin, you were drunk, it’s fine.” 

“Can we just...can we get in the car and get to Mexico now, please?” Erin muffles out, and she’s surprised when Holtzmann responds.

“Yeah, of course. But you can’t get angry at me for going out into the sun.”

*****************************************

After eight and a half hours of non-stop driving in total silence, it slowly starts to dawn on Erin, who is still nursing the hangover from hell that Holtzmann has not said a word in the entire eight hours they’ve been driving. The sun has long set, and they’re close to reaching the border of Mexico.

“Holtz?” Her voice cracks from lack of use, and Holtzmann doesn’t respond, her eyes staring straight ahead.

“Holtzmann, we haven’t spoken for eight hours. Is everything okay?” Holtzmann’s knuckles turn white as she grips the steering wheel, but she smiles at Erin nonetheless.

“Yeah, Gilbert. Everything’s fine.” Erin doesn’t let it go.

“Did I do something?”

“No, of course not.”

“Then what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong.”

“You haven’t spoken to me all day.”

“You’re hungover.”

“I did something, didn’t I?”

“No-.”

“Then why-.”

“Let it go, Erin!” Her voice is harsh, and Erin finds herself sinking into her seat as she nods.

“Okay.” She manages to squeak out. Holtzmann bites her lip and growls under her breath before turning to look at Erin.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” 

“No it’s not. I hate being like this.” 

“Like what?”

“Angry all the fucking time.”

“We’ll get the answers, Holtz. We’re almost there.” 

Erin finally sees the border ahead of her, the long line of cars looking to cross over and she sucks in a breath as Holtzmann’s grip on the steering wheel tightens.

“Almost there.” 

*****************************************************

The next few days are torture.

They manage to pass across the border without an issue, and at Erin’s request, don’t stop at a Motel for the night and instead drive for 12 hours straight from the border to Mexico City.

Erin’s been to Mexico a few times, but can’t help but smile at the sights around her, the unfamiliarity of it all as the kids play soccer on the streets and the houses pass in a flash of different colors. 

Holtzmann is still quiet the entire drive there, and Erin finds herself making a promise to not only herself, but to Holtzmann.

“Hey. When this is all over...when we find the answers and we figure this out, we’re gonna come back here. On holiday. Enjoy it instead of, you know, stressing.” Holtzmann simply smiles, but when Erin turns her head back to the street, it fades, her jaw tightening as she only drives faster toward Mexico City.

They arrive in Mexico City in the morning, and Erin decides to jump straight into duty, despite Holtzmann’s protests that she needs sleep.

“I can do this. I’ll sleep at night, when you can take over.” 

She begins roaming the streets, and that’s when it all begins.

For four days, four goddamn days straight, Erin and Holtzmann take turns moving around the streets of Mexico, sometimes together, sometimes separately, always asking about an Aztec Temple nearby. 

Every single person they come across has no idea what they’re talking about, even when Holtzmann asks them in Spanish (which always sends a tingle up Erin’s spine). 

Finally, after five nights, five nights of questions and verbal abuse, and anger, and frustration, and sadness and every other emotion under the sun, they finally get somewhere. 

They prepare to leave for the night as the sun begins to set, Erin ignoring Holtzmann’s protests that she should get some sleep as they make their way out of their Motel. Erin drives, making her way through the City when she notices what looks like a raucous, but conspicuous bar in the corner of a nearby street.

“Let’s check over here.”

“It’s gonna be the same shit, Erin.” Holtzmann says, running a hand through her hair in frustration and Erin reaches out and grabs her hand.

“We haven’t checked there yet, though. Come on.” She makes her way over to the small bar, parking her car simply on the side of the road and as soon as she steps out, the sound of Spanish music fills her eardrums. She swallows the lump in her throat and makes her way up to it as Holtzmann tails behind her. 

She prays that no one attempts to start anything. Yesterday a man had gotten angry at Erin for asking stupid questions and Holtzmann had punched him clean in the face, knocking him out as Erin had grabbed Holtzmann and dragged her back to the Motel before any more trouble could brew. 

She feels safe, having Holtzmann by her side, but at the same time, she’d rather no one else get hurt.

They enter the bar, and Erin’s surprised to find it’s quite civil, a few people simply sitting down in seats and few at the bar, all of them chatting in low voices as Erin makes her way over to the bar. She takes a seat, Holtzmann standing behind her as Erin turns to the first person on her right, an old man who knocks back a tequila shot and turns to look at her with bloodshot eyes.

“If you’re looking to score, I’m not your guy.” He slurs, and Erin’s eyes widen. His English is good, despite the fact that his accent is thick and he’s so drunk, Erin can smell the alcohol on him.

“Actually I’m looking for a place.”

“Aren’t we all?” He chuckles, knocking back another shot and Erin winces.

“An Aztec Temple nearby.” The man frowns, turns to look at her, and chuckles.

“What are you talking about, girl?”

“I-.”

“You don’t want to go there.” Erin jumps in surprise and feels Holtzmann’s nails dig into her shoulder as she turns to her left to see a young man who looks equally as disheveled as the old man on the right of Erin, stubble covering his face as he looks at Erin with a pained look in his eyes.

“You-you know what I’m talking about?” Erin’s heart catches in her throat and she exchanges a glance with Holtzmann, who, for the first time in days, looks hopeful.

“You don’t want to go there.” He repeats more firmly, and he goes to stand, but Holtzmann reaches out and grabs his shoulder.

“Please. I need to go there. It holds answers...answers I need.” He looks at Holtzmann, observes her for almost a minute straight before he blinks rapidly and sighs.

“Te convirtieron en una culebra de la noche.” He whispers, and he slams his hand down onto the bar in anger as Erin looks at Holtzmann in confusion. Holtzmann’s eyes are wide and Erin grips her hand.

“Holtz?” She ignores her, her eyes still on the man.

“They did. And I need to know, I need answers-.”

“That place holds no answers. Only death.” He says, and he stands, stumbling slightly before Holtzmann grabs him.

“Please. I’m begging you.” She whispers desperately. He looks at her, tears in his eyes as he sighs and nods.

“Desde el atardecer hasta el amanecer.” Erin frowns, and so does Holtzmann, and he shakes his head, turning away from them.

“‘From Dusk ‘Till Dawn.’ That’s the name of the place you’re looking for.” And with that, he walks away, Erin and Holtzmann watching him leave in shock.

“What did he say in Spanish before?” Erin whispers. Holtzmann lets out a shaky breath.

“He said ‘they turned you into a snake of the night’. He knows.” 

“We need to find this place. We have a name now. Bartender!” Erin slams her hand down onto the bar and the bartender walks over to her.

“What can I get you, ma’am?”

“Just directions. A place called ‘From Dusk Till Dawn’. Heard of it?” The bartender’s eyes widen and she chuckles.

“Oh, I don’t think two pretty little women like you want to go messing with a place like that.” She says, shaking her head as she cleans a glass. Erin glares at her.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“It means, not even the meanest and craziest guys in this town go to that place. That place is haunted with something, man. Most people who go in, don’t come out. I’d stay away if I were you.” Erin’s about to open her mouth when Holtzmann suddenly leans across the bar and grabs the bartender by her shirt, pulling her forward until their inches apart.

“I’m not most people. Where is it?” She growls. The bartender’s eyes widen and the whole place goes quiet as she grips Holtzmann’s hand in her shirt.

“Calm down, Chica Blanca. You want in? It’s a few miles south from here, in an isolated part of the City. It’s huge, almost as big as a temple. You can’t miss it. Trust me.” Erin tugs on Holtzmann’s shirt and she finally relinquishes her hold on the bartender, who straightens her shirt and points at the door, anger written all over her face.

“Go find your final destination, ladies. You won’t make it out alive.” She says wickedly, and Holtzmann stalks out of the bar, glaring at anyone who stares as Erin follows behind her. 

They’re making their way to the car when Erin feels something hit the back of her head, a sharp pain exploding throughout her body as she collapses to the ground with a groan. She hears the sound of struggling, then the sound of glass breaking, and Erin looks up, her eyes tearing up from the pain and causing everything to become blurry as she sees the guy from the bar on top of Holtzmann, a sharp piece of wood in his hands, which is hovering above Holtzmann’s heart-

“NO!” Erin stumbles forward and barrels into him, and he grunts as they topple to the ground, both of them struggling until Holtzmann grabs the guy by the back of his neck and throws him against the car, pinning him by his throat. He punches her in the face and she staggers back, and he raises the piece of wood-

“STOP! DON’T!” Erin pushes Holtzmann behind her, protecting the Engineer with her entire body as she stares at the man in front of her, who stops short, looking at Erin in shock and disbelief.

“What are you doing? Move!” He growls.

“Don’t hurt her, please!” Erin breathes out desperately. 

“Do you know what she is? What her people do? She’s a murderer!” He growls, and he moves forward again, but Erin shakes her head, a choked sob escaping her.

“Please! She wants to fix this, that’s why we’re here! You can’t hurt her, please!” 

“Fix this? There is no fixing this!” He hisses, and Erin sees the tears in his eyes as he tries once again to get to Holtzmann behind Erin.

“They killed someone, didn’t they? Someone you love?” Erin whispers. He stops, freezing as his eyes move from Holtzmann to Erin. Holtzmann grips Erin’s hand tightly, and Erin squeezes it, her back still pressed against Holtzmann’s chest defensively. The man grits his teeth.

“They didn’t kill her. They did something much worse.” He breathes. Erin watches him, the despair in his eyes...

“They turned her.” Holtzmann says behind her. He looks behind Erin, that anger returning before it’s replaced with sorrow. 

“Yes.” He whispers. Erin swallows the lump in her throat.

“I know that this is painful. And I know you’re hurting. But she didn’t do this. She didn’t turn the person you love. She’s a victim in all of this, and we’re trying, we’re trying so hard to find answers, please...we’ve come all this way, and I...she has people who love her back home, too. You can’t do to them what they did to you.” His hands are shaking now, and finally, he drops the sharpened piece of wood, his hands falling uselessly to his sides as he steps back.

“If you go...don’t take her with you. God knows what they’ll do to her.” He says to Holtzmann, pointing at Erin, and suddenly, he’s walking away, his footsteps echoing in the alleyway as Erin and Holtzmann simply stand there, clutching each other for support.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so excited for the rest of this story and I hope you guys are too!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry again for the long wait but whoa is this a doozy please don't hate me after this

Erin’s heart is still pounding frantically as Holtzmann drives, her hands tight on the steering wheel as Erin groans and rests her head against the window, her head spinning from the hit she took.

“We’re almost there, just hang on.”

“Almost where?” Erin mumbles, but Holtzmann doesn’t reply, and it quickly dawns on Erin that the place they’re driving past looks familiar.

“We’re going back to the Motel?” Erin says in confusion.

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re not coming with me.” 

Silence.

Erin simply stares, blinking rapidly as she tries to process what Holtzmann just said. Before she can open her mouth, Holtzmann raises a finger to silence her.

“Don’t. You won’t win this argument.”

“Wanna bet?” 

“Erin, you heard what that guy said. What all of them said. That place is dangerous and I’m not putting you in any more danger.”

“We agreed we were going to do this together.” Erin says through clenched teeth. Holtzmann growls under her breath.

“That was before I found out that the place we’re looking for is practically a missing person’s crime scene.” She hisses.

“Turn the car around, we’re going South, where that woman told us to go.”

“No.”

“Holtzmann-.” 

“Erin, please?” Her voice cracks, and when Erin turns to look at her, she’s almost crying, tears in her eyes. Erin’s heart drops, and she knows nothing she says now is going to matter.

“Holtz…”

“Erin, if you come with me, and I lose you…I won’t be able to live with myself. Please, just promise you’ll stay safe at the Motel?” Erin doesn’t reply, simply rests her head against the cool glass of the window.

“What about me? What about how I feel? Do you think I’m gonna be okay at the Motel, safe and sound and worrying about you the entire time you’re gone? Wondering if you’re dead, wondering if they’ve hurt you? I can’t…” Erin cuts herself off when she feels the lump in her throat, and she swallows it down and shakes her head. 

“Erin…”

“Holtzmann, I can’t. We can’t do this without each other. We care about each other too much. I’m not going to get hurt. You’ll protect me, I know you will.” Holtzmann’s grip on the steering wheel is now so tight, that Erin thinks she’ll have to pry her hands off it when they get out of the car, and Holtzmann groans and pulls over, resting her head on the steering wheel as they come to a stop.

“Erin…Erin, Erin, Erin…” She breathes. 

“Holtz…” She reaches out, fingers closing around Holtzmann’s wrist, and she sighs and moves her hand down to interlace their fingers, her ice cold skin touching Erin’s heated skin, and Erin sighs in content, closing her eyes at her touch.

“Holtz, please…” When she opens her eyes, Holtzmann is staring at her with a look Erin has never seen before, and without a word, she puts the car back into drive and spins the wheel tightly, the tires screeching against the road as they go in the opposite direction of the Motel and head South.

***************************

“Well, they were right. Definitely can’t miss it.”

Holtzmann is frozen in shock, looking up at the sight before her. 

It was definitely isolated, in a desolate part outside of Mexico City, but Holtzmann’s pretty sure you’d be able to see it from space.

It’s definitely an Aztec Temple, the steps not all that high however, with a gigantic red sign that reads “Open From Dusk Till Dawn” right at the top of the temple which blinks, the music flooding from it loud and obnoxious, guitars and the foreign words that Holtzmann knows is Spanish despite the fact that it’s muffled. 

She exchanges a glance with Erin, who simply nods as they park their car on the side amongst a slew of other cars and jump out, both of them on edge. Holtzmann can’t help but edge herself close to Erin, to the point where she’s practically on top of her as they both make their way toward the steps that lead up into the temple.

“Is it a bar?” Erin asks, looking up at the sight before her.

“I think so.” Holtzmann replies. 

They’re greeted by a woman in only a brassiere and underwear, and Holtzmann finds herself staring a little too long as Erin pokes her in the ribs.

The woman doesn’t say a word, simply stares before extending a hand and opening the door before them. Holtzmann tries to calm her nerves down as she enters.

Inside, it’s chaos.

There’s men everywhere, and Holtzmann can smell them. Some of them are definitely human, the sweat mixing with pheromones and adrenaline and the lust for blood hits her like a freight train. She grits her teeth and grips Erin’s hand in her own, and Erin gives her a gentle squeeze.

“You okay?” Holtzmann simply nods. 

All of the men are yelling, cheering on women who are dressed similar to the woman they met outside, some of them dancing on tables, some of them serving alcohol and beer to the men at the tables salivating at them. 

“Uh, Holtz? I think this is a strip club.”

“There’s no naked-.” Erin clears her throat and points above the bar. Holtzmann follows her gaze and sees a woman perched on top of the cabinet where all the drinks are, no top on, wearing a thong.

Holtzmann clears her throat and averts her gaze, all the while ignoring the throbbing feeling in her stomach.

“Oh.” Is all she manages to get out. Erin sighs and leans in close to Holtzmann, her mouth at Holtzmann’s ear.

“Do we know who we’re looking for?” She asks. Holtzmann shakes her head, and simply looks around. 

She can smell the humans more now, the thirst making her throat burn and she groans, trying her best to concentrate. She catches the eye of a young girl in the corner of the temple, seated in what looks like a V.I.P area, drinking what looks an awful lot like-

“Blood.” 

“What?” Erin leans in, not hearing Holtzmann the first time, but Holtzmann walks toward the young girl, who doesn’t notice her at first, simply observing everyone around her, and the girl’s eyes widen as she looks at Holtzmann, then suddenly smiles and beckons her forward with a finger.

“Erin...” Holtzmann nods her head toward the younger girl and Erin follows her gaze, then suddenly inhales sharply.

“Is she luring us over to kill us?”

“No one’s gonna hurt you. Too many witnesses. Besides, I won’t let her.” Erin chuckles nervously, but grips Holtzmann’s hand as she leads them over to the corner of the Temple where the young woman is sat. She looks up at them as they come closer, and she smiles.

“We’ve been waiting for you.” Holtzmann freezes, blinks rapidly.

“What?” She says blankly. The girl stands and extends her hand to the couch she just left.

“Sit. I’ll grab Mireya.” 

“Who?” The girl simply smiles, and as soon as Holtzmann and Erin sit, she leaves. Holtzmann bites the inside of her cheek and practically sits on top of Erin in an attempt to keep her safe from prying eyes.

“Holtz?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re practically on top of me.”

“I wish you were saying that under different circumstances, Gilbert, but I’m not moving.” 

She can practically feel the heat radiating off Erin at her words, and she smirks, but only for the briefest second before the girl arrives back around the corner.

And this time, she’s accompanied by someone who makes Holtzmann gasp in shock.

“Erin, it’s the woman, the woman I was seeing in those visions!” She breathes. But Erin isn’t responding. Holtzmann gets off her and looks to see Erin staring at the woman in awe.

“She’s beautiful...” Erin whispers. Holtzmann looks back at the woman.

Dark hair, dark eyes, perfect body, beautiful beyond compare...Holtzmann simply nods, but she’s more worried about Erin, who looks like she’s entered a trance.

“Erin?” She doesn’t respond, and Holtzmann’s breath catches in her throat when the woman comes to a stop in front of them. She’s clad in a black pantsuit, a small smile on her face as her eyes flit back and forth between the two scientists.

“Jillian and Erin, I presume?” Her voice is soft, but not gentle. Holtzmann’s eyes widen.

“How do you know?”

“Word travels. You’ve made quite a name for yourselves already in Mexico City.” She chuckles before sitting down at the table in front of them, observing them both.

“I’m sure you have a lot of questions-.”

“Why did you do this to me?” Holtzmann says simply. She may as well start with the hardest question. The woman sighs and leans forward, an expression of guilt on her face as she runs a hand through her dark hair.

“My name is Mireya. I was the first, and I will most likely be the last. Rituals that have long come and gone are what turned me into this. Turned you into this.” 

“That doesn’t answer why you decided to ruin my life.” Holtzmann hisses, anger beginning to boil deep within her. Mireya’s expression turns stony.

“I’ve given you immortality. I don’t see how that’s ruined your life.” She replies. Holtzmann glares at her.

“I’ve killed people. I’ve hurt people. You think it’s something special?” Holtzmann growls. Mireya raises an eyebrow.

“You will live forever. A few casualties is nothing compared to that gift.” 

“I don’t want your fucking gift.” Mireya’s smirk fades now, replaced with anger, and Holtzmann can feel Erin digging her nails into Holtzmann’s forearm.

“Then kill yourself, if you find it so heinous. You’re undeserving.” Mireya growls. Before Erin can do or say anything, Holtzmann is leaping forward, a hand wrapped around Mireya’s throat, and Mireya barely even reacts, simply grabs Holtzmann by the throat and lifts her with ease, throwing her down onto the table and choking her. Pain explodes throughout Holtzmann’s body as the world spins around her.

“Holtzmann!” Erin stands, and Mireya turns to look at her, eyes wide in shock as Erin suddenly slackens and falls back down onto the couch before looking down at Holtzmann. 

“Are you done?” Holtzmann glares at her, and she lets her go. Holtzmann rushes over to Erin, who is still staring at Mireya as if she holds all the answers to life itself.

“What did you do to her?”

“Humans are susceptible to compulsion around me. She’s fine.” Holtzmann glares at Mireya, who sighs. 

“You want answers? I’m ready to give them.”

“Take her out of this trance first.” Mireya rolls her eyes, but Erin suddenly blinks rapidly and looks at Holtzmann in confusion. Holtzmann sighs and looks at Mireya.

“Why did you do this to me?” Mireya shrugs.

“We need more numbers. We’re a dying race, and I asked an old friend to spread our numbers a little.”

“The Ghost.” Holtzmann says. Mireya nods.

“Yes. For a long time, I thought I was the only one who could turn others into vampires, being the Original. But when she died, she found that as a Ghost, she could turn people as well from the Other Side. She’s been roaming all over the Earth at my request, turning as many people as she can and sending them my way.”

“Why? Why do you want them here?”

“We’re a family. We need to stay together. I need numbers, Jillian. That’s all.” 

Holtzmann watches Mireya for a few seconds, trying to figure out her response when it hits her that she’s not even important.

She’s fodder. They’ve ruined her life simply to get more numbers.

“So you turned my life upside down, ruined me, destroyed my soul...for safety in numbers?” She can feel it now, the anger building inside her, the white hot anger making her whole body burn and the thirst for blood only intensifying as Mireya shakes her head.

“You’re not just some number in a system, Jillian. You’re one of us now.”

“We came all this way...I thought there was something to this, something more, and instead...” Holtzmann is blinking back tears now, her anger white hot as Mireya chuckles.

“We’re monsters, Jillian. Creatures with no souls. Ruining lives is part of our job. Now come, have a drink with us. I see you’ve brought a snack already." Mireya raises an eyebrow at Erin.

Holtzmann snaps. 

“YOU FUCKING TOUCH HER AND I’LL-.” She doesn’t even finish her sentence, growling animalistically as she jumps at Mireya and throws her against the wall with so much force, the Temple wall cracks a little. Mireya crumples to the ground and Holtzmann’s anger is unparalleled now. She grabs Erin’s hand and drags her with all her strength, Erin doesn’t resist, but Holtzmann feels herself being pushed and suddenly pinned against the wall, the sound of hissing and snarling filling her ear drums as she’s punched in the stomach, the pain exploding throughout her body-

“ENOUGH!” Mireya’s voice booms all over the Temple, and Holtzmann groans as whoever has her by the neck lets her go. She grips the back of her head, her anger dissipating as Erin runs forward and wraps her arms around her.

“Holtzmann!”

She throws Erin behind her, glaring at the people around her as she feels something wet fall down her face. It doesn’t hit her that’s blood until she feels Erin’s shaking body pressed against hers.

“You’re bleeding.” She whispers.

“Stay behind me.” Holtzmann mumbles. The other humans in the bar are looking around in confusion, and Mireya suddenly rushes forward and glares at Holtzmann.

“Settle down, now.” Holtzmann suddenly feels a wave of calm course through her and she relaxes as Mireya turns to face the others in the Temple with a smile.

“I apologize! Rowdy girl, this one! Continue with the celebrations!” The men cheer, and Holtzmann feels her anger slowly returning as Mireya turns to face her with a snarl.

“You almost lost us our dinner, Jillian.” She says calmly, but Holtzmann can see her hands are balled into fists. Holtzmann’s eyes widen as she looks at the almost thirty plus men around her, all of them destined to die here tonight.

All the people in the City...they were right. 

This is where you came to die. 

“Because of that, you now have two choices. Either you leave your little pet behind and get the hell out of my club, or you allow me just a little taste...” She’s walking towards Erin now, and Holtzmann tries to move, but four incredibly muscular and incredibly strong men grab her and pin her against the wall again, and she can’t move an inch, their meaty hands gripping her body tightly. She’s rooted to the spot, unable to move, unable to speak, unable to do anything as Mireya moves behind Erin and brushes her hair back from her neck. Erin has entered that trance again, her eyes blank as Mireya grins up at Holtzmann.

“Don’t...” She’s begging now, reduced to pleading as tears fall down her cheeks, but she can’t move. Despite the strength being turned into a vampire has given her, the men overpower her, their fangs showing threateningly, and she can’t do anything, simply watch helplessly as Mireya’s fangs grow and she snakes an arm around Erin’s waist to hold her in place.

“Smart choice.” Mireya says, and Holtzmann’s heart is practically tearing because she didn’t fucking choose this, and she wants to scream, she wants to tear everyone in this place in half, Erin, Erin, Erin-

Mireya’s teeth sink into Erin’s neck, Erin lets out a small gasp of pain before she suddenly sinks backward into Mireya’s arms, her eyes closing and Holtzmann whimpers, attempting to push the men holding her and one of them decides he’s had enough and punches her clean in the face, his fist impacting with her jaw until she’s seeing stars, spitting blood from her mouth as she’s punched one last time in the gut and thrown to the floor. She’s standing, already running for Mireya despite the pain when Mireya throws Erin at her and laughs. Holtzmann catches Erin, almost falling from the effort as Mireya grins wickedly at her, Erin’s blood dripping from her mouth.

“You...” Holtzmann whimpers, and Mireya wipes Erin’s blood from her mouth and licks the finger she used to wipe it off.

“Damn, she tastes good. Don’t worry, I didn’t turn her. No, I’ve done something much worse. Enjoy your ride back to New York, Jillian. You’re going to have one hell of a trip with an addict for a companion. One bite is all it takes.” Holtzmann glares, but she knows if she attempts to fight them right now, both her and Erin are dead. Mireya laughs again. 

“Give it a few hours. She’ll be begging you to bite her.” Holtzmann’s eyes are darting all over the club, at the forty or so vampires currently eyeballing her, and her grip on Erin tightens.

“Now get the hell out of my club.” Mireya hisses. Holtzmann blinks back blood and tears as she drags Erin back and out of the club. The cold air hits her as she flies through the door, and she hears someone ask what’s going on before there’s the sound of screams and cries of pain and she feels bile rise in the back of her throat as she drags Erin into the car and drives as fast and as far as she can from the club, only stopping after she’s sure she’s a few miles away to let out a scream of frustration and grief.

********************************************

“Erin?” She groans, blinks rapidly as her vision clears and she sees the familiar ceiling of the Motel above her. 

“Erin?” She turns, eyes focusing on blonde hair and blue eyes as Holtzmann smiles at her softly, her eyes sparkling with tears and Erin can see her blonde hair is matted with red, dried blood caked on the side of her face-

“Holtzmann? What happened?” She sits up, feels the pain at her neck and clutches it, and Holtzmann sucks in a breath as Erin’s fingers run over two small marks on her neck.

“What-.”

“Mireya bit you. I couldn’t stop her.” Holtzmann clenches her jaw, her hands curling into fists as a rage unlike anything Erin has ever seen takes over her features.

“I’m...”

“No. She said she didn’t turn you. She...she drank from you for a while.” Holtzmann’s voice is thick, and tears fall down her face.

“I’m okay.” Erin says hoarsely, reaching out. Holtzmann moves away and stands, her back to Erin as she lets out a breath. 

"What did she say?" 

"Nothing. She didn't give me answers. She told me all she wanted was numbers, so she sent that Ghost bitch to turn a bunch of people into vampires so she could have more of her species roaming around the place. There's no grand plan, nothing. Just a species trying to survive by...ruining other people's fucking lives." Holtzmann kicks at the chair on the table by the corner of their Motel room, and Erin jumps.

"Holtz..."

"I couldn't even fight. She...She attacked you and all I wanted to do was get you out of there..." Holtzmann croaks out, and Erin shakes her head.

"Holtz, I'm okay." Holtzmann bites her lip and turns.

“Are...are you sure?” She still has her back turned, and Erin clears her throat.

“Yeah...you’re really worried, huh?” She stands, stumbles a little and Holtzmann rushes over to her and holds her steady, concern all over her face.

“I’m so sorry.” She whispers. 

“Holtz...” Erin reaches up and touches her cheek, thumb grazing over her cheekbone before she picks up the bravery to run her thumb over Holtzmann’s lips, sucking in a sharp breath as she does so and Holtzmann stares at her with wide eyes filled with something Erin’s never seen before-

She throws caution to the wind.

She leans forward, lips meeting Holtzmann’s in a kaleidoscope of emotions and frantic heartbeats as she steadies herself in Holtzmann’s arms, deepening the kiss, needing something more, something deep and meaningful, something filled with love and fury and passion and energy and heat-

Holtzmann pulls away, shaking her head as she practically runs to the other side of the room, leaving Erin breathless.

“We can’t. I can’t, Erin.” She whispers hoarsely. Erin’s heart drops, tears springing to her eyes as Holtzmann growls and grips her hair almost manically.

“No, I...fuck, I want to, Erin. God, I want to, I’ve wanted to since I first met you, but...I can hear your heart beating and I can feel my throat burning and I...you were just bitten and you’re injured and I just...”

“Okay...I’m sorry.” Erin whispers, and Holtzmann whimpers before she suddenly runs forward and pushes Erin down onto the bed, lips meeting hers hungrily and Erin kisses her back with everything she has, trying to pour out her frustrations and her feelings and her fondness for Holtzmann into this simply movement before Holtzmann pulls back again and growls under her breath.

“I can’t.” She hisses. Erin snakes a hand around the back of Holtzmann’s neck and pulls her forehead.

“Holtzmann, if...if you have to...” Their faces are inches away from each other, Erin’s tongue snaking out, tasting Holtzmann’s lips and Holtzmann swallows the lump in her throat, her mouth going dry as she looks at Erin.

“What?” Erin bites her lip.

She doesn’t remember it. She remembers pain. Then beauty. Understanding. Love. Euphoria.

All she knows is she wants it again.

“You can bite me, if...if it’ll help.” Holtzmann’s eyes go wide. In less than a heartbeat, she’s pulling herself off of Erin and throwing herself against the wall.

“Fuck. FUCK!”

“What? Holtzmann!” Erin stares in shock as Holtzmann suddenly runs around the room and begins packing their suitcases, fury written all over her face as she throws whatever she can find into the suitcases and shuts them.

“We’re leaving. We need to go home, we need to get as far away from here as possible.”

“But-.”

“Erin, now! That fucking bitch!” Holtzmann almost kicks their Motel door off its hinges as she drags both of their suitcases out of the door, and Erin simply watches her breathlessly in shock, disappointment and confusion flooding through her.

_What the fuck just happened?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all aboard the "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!" train! Fair warning, the next few chapters are gonna be fucking DARK and psychologically fucked, so...I did warn y'all.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am the worst. also enjoy.

They’ve been driving for twenty-four hours straight.

They’ve long left Mexico, and are now on the border of Arkansas, the night heavy and almost suffocating around them and Erin squirms in her seat for what feels like the thousandth time.

Neither of them have spoken. It’s been complete silence for twenty-four hours.

Erin doesn’t know what to say, what to think. She’s not sure she can think about anything else other than-

“How are you feeling?”

She jumps, the sound of Holtzmann’s voice so sudden and so abrupt as she turns to face her. Holtzmann’s expression is pained, but there’s curiosity there, too, the scientist in her coming out to play as Erin lets out a deep breath and shrugs.

“I’m fine. Are...are you okay?” Holtzmann bites her lip, nods once before turning to look back at the road.

“She said...one bite was all it took, and that I’d be traveling back home with an addict...” Holtzmann says, clearing her throat. Erin waits, confusion taking her over as Holtzmann looks at her once more.

“What did you feel when Mireya bit you?” She asks softly. Erin bites back the groan threatening to emit from her as she remembers the feeling of euphoria that swept through her only seconds after Mireya’s teeth had sunk into her neck.

“I...I felt like I was floating. She bit me and I felt it, I felt the pain, and then...I don’t know, everything was beautiful. Everything was painless and free and-.”

“Wonderful?” Holtzmann finishes. Erin nods, and Holtzmann winces.

“Yeah...that’s how I felt for a few seconds after that Ghost bitch bit me, too. Then I just...faded.” Erin watches her for a few moments.

“Holtz, are you sure I’m not-.”

“You would’ve exhibited signs by now. I was within twelve hours of being bitten. Are your senses heightened?” Erin shakes her head.

“No.”

“Are you craving something that you’ve never felt or had before?” 

“No.” 

“You’re okay, then. Still human.” She smiles, the brightness not quite reaching her eyes and Erin squirms in her seat again.

“I...why do you think a vampire bite effects humans like that?” Holtzmann shrugs.

“Must be something in the saliva. Now that I think of it, the people I’ve bitten...they never put up much of a fight.” Holtzmann clenches her jaw, and Erin’s fingers brush over the knuckles of her hand resting on top of the gear shift. 

“Endorphins?” 

“Something like that. We’ll examine it when we get home.” She’s clenching her jaw again, and Erin truly takes in Holtzmann’s appearance now.

Her eyes are dark and sunken, her skin incredibly pale and Erin stares at her before she realizes something.

“Holtzmann, how long as it been since you’ve had blood?” Holtzmann shrugs.

“Since before we went to that bar.” Erin gasps.

“Holtzmann! That was over a day ago! You need blood!”

“I don’t have any bags left, I’ll be fine until we get home, Erin.” Erin glares at her.

“Home is another day’s drive away! You said you can’t go longer than a day without blood!”

“Erin, I know what you’re getting at.” Her grip is tight on the steering wheel, and Erin bites her lip, her heart pounding frantically.

“You won’t kill me. I know you won’t. And you can’t turn me, either. Mireya said only her and that Ghost are able to do it.” 

“Yeah, but why? Why are they the only ones? I got none of the answers I wanted-.”

“It’s the scientist in you, Holtzmann. Sometimes things just are. There’s no explanation.” Holtzmann’s eyes widen and she looks at Erin in shock.

“No scientist would ever say that."

"No scientist would say that Ghosts and Vampires and anything supernatural exists either! And yet here we are." Erin says, chuckling. 

Holtzmann doesn't buy it.

"How badly do you want me to do bite you?” She says incredulously. Erin shivers, forcing it into a shrug.

“You need blood.”

“You want that high again.” 

“It’s not bad-.”

“No. It’s like getting addicted to drugs, Erin. And I don’t know if I’ll be able to stop, what if I kill you?”

“You won’t-.”

“We’re not discussing this anymore.”

“Fine, then let’s discuss our kiss.” Holtzmann suddenly pulls over, the car skidding against the gravel on the ground as she comes to a stop in front of a blinking red light and Erin looks out to see a Motel sign blinking at her. 

“We’re stopping for the night.”

“Holtzmann, we need to talk about it.”

“I told you what I needed to tell you.” Holtzmann gets out of the car, and Erin growls in frustration as she follows Holtzmann to the back of the car. She picks both their suitcases up in her arms and practically runs at the speed of light to the lobby, Erin struggling to keep up with her.

As soon as they’ve booked themselves a room for the night, they enter their Motel room and Holtzmann shuts the door behind her as Erin sighs.

“Get some rest.”

“We talk about this first.” Holtzmann sighs in frustration.

“Erin, I told you-.”

“You said to me that you’d been wanting to do that since you first met me. You’re telling me you’ve liked me like that this entire time and I’ve been completely oblivious to it?” Holtzmann looks at her sheepishly.

“I mean, I did flirt with you...a lot.” 

“I thought you were joking around!’ 

“I mean, a joke ends after a while, Erin. It gets boring.” She mumbles. Erin shakes her head and throws her arms up in exasperation.

“How did I not notice?”

“And what about you?”

“What about me?”

“You kissed me first. Do you like me like that or were you just trying to get me to bite you?” She clenches her jaw at the last part, and Erin bites down on her lip, unable to stop her heart racing and her cheeks from flushing.

“No, I...I do like you like that. Have for a while, actually.” She says softly, chuckling nervously. Holtzmann lets out a breath and runs a shaking hand through her hair.

“Right. Great. We spent months liking each other and we never acted on it and now I’m a monster who eats people and can barely even be in the same room as you.”

“You’re doing pretty well so far.” 

“I’m struggling, trust me.” 

“Holtzmann-.”

“Erin, I’m not biting you.” She hisses, and Erin rolls her eyes and flops down onto the nearest bed.

“Fine. I’m going to bed.” Holtzmann doesn’t respond, so Erin curls up under the blanket of her bed and rests her head on the pillow, closing her eyes and feigning sleep.

She actually does drift off for a little while, and when she opens her eyes, Holtzmann is lying down on the bed beside her, looking up at the ceiling as tears fall from the corners of her eyes, into her hair.

Erin gently throws the covers off herself and stands, and Holtzmann sucks in a breath but doesn’t look at her.

Erin gently lays down beside her, before she props herself up on one elbow and plucks up the courage to rest her hand on top of Holtzmann’s stomach. Holtzmann shakes her head, and Erin sighs, going to move her hand before Holtzmann suddenly rests her own hand on top of Erin’s.

“Erin, I’m struggling.” She says hoarsely. Erin bites her lip, ignoring the pounding in her ears as she leans in, pressing a gentle kiss to Holtzmann’s cheek. When she moves, their only inches apart, and Erin can see the tears clinging to Holtzmann’s eyelashes as she leans in and presses her lips against Holtzmann’s gently. 

Holtzmann doesn’t respond, her lips still until Erin’s hand snakes under her shirt, heated fingers brushing against the skin of her stomach and Holtzmann groans as she finally gives in and raises the hand resting on top of Erin’s and entangles it in Erin’s hair, gripping the back of her neck as she pulls Erin closer to her, deepening the kiss as Erin practically shoves herself on top of Holtzmann breathlessly, her heart pounding and her body tingling with excitement-

“Erin...” Holtzmann whines, and Erin pulls herself away, lips trailing down Holtzmann’s jaw, down to her neck, and she bites down gently, and Holtzmann whimpers, gripping Erin’s shoulder and suddenly flipping her onto her back.

When Erin sees her face, her eyes are glowing gold, bloodshot as the veins in her face pop and her canine teeth extend. Erin lets out a gasp of anticipation, and Holtzmann digs her nails into Erin’s skin.

“Please don’t make me do this.” Holtzmann whispers. Erin brushes her thumb across Holtzmann’s lips, fingers touching her sharpened teeth.

“You need blood.” Erin throws her hair back, exposing her neck and Holtzmann groans.

“No, I can’t, no, no, no, no...” Holtzmann’s pulling away.

Erin grips her, holding her in place.

“It’s okay...” She touches Holtzmann’s cheek, hand snaking around to the back of her neck to bring her down. She resists.

“Erin, please...” Holtzmann begs, her voice breaking with emotion.

“It’s okay...” Erin tugs, Holtzmann rests her forehead against Erin’s, breathing deeply.

“I can’t hurt you.” She whispers. Erin bites back a sigh of frustration.

Decides she needs to take drastic matters.

She swipes her thumb over Holtzmann’s teeth again, this time harder and with more purpose, and she hisses as the skin on her finger breaks.

Holtzmann’s pupils dilate as she breathes in through her nose.

“Fuck.”

“Give in.” Erin breathes. Holtzmann’s face contorts, and she leans against Erin again, her chest heaving.

She’s crying.

“Shh...” Erin kisses her, tilts her head up, shivers in anticipation as the movement causes Holtzmann’s lips to trail down to her jaw, to her neck...

She’s gentle, tongue snaking out to taste her before her teeth sink in.

It’s five seconds of earth shattering pain that cause a whimper to escape her before it fades.

She’s in paradise. 

The feeling coursing through her is bliss, pure bliss. It’s nothing short of orgasmic, flooding through her body and causing her muscles to tighten and release, a breathy moan escaping her as Holtzmann groans against her, and Erin can’t help the chuckle that escapes her as she closes her eyes and drifts...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was gonna give y'all the angst that follows this, but I haven't quite finished writing it yet and I don't wanna leave y'all hanging! but in the words of scar from lion king - be prepared!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY.

When she wakes, the feeling is gone.

Pain and reality hits her like a freight train and Erin groans as her hand almost instinctively moves toward her neck, fingers brushing over the swollen skin and the puncture marks. She takes a deep breath in, realizing slowly that she’s survived.

She’s alive and Holtzmann hasn’t killed her.

“Holtz?”

She looks around the room with blurred visions, her eyes tearing from the pain at her neck and she sees Holtzmann at the window, staring outside with her back to Erin.

“Holtz?” Erin tries again. Holtzmann is as still as a statue, her back rigid and her arms tense, crossed over her chest. Erin gingerly swings her body over the bed and stands, wincing as pain explodes throughout her body.

“Holtzmann? Can you look at me, please?” She still doesn’t move, so Erin grits her teeth and moves closer toward her, and when she’s five steps away from her, Holtzmann growls lowly and shakes her head.

“Stay away from me.” She says hoarsely. Erin bites down on her lower lip, lets it go and Holtzmann closes her eyes and takes a deep breath in through her mouth.

“I’m okay, Holtz.”

“I don’t care. I bit you.” Her voice cracks, and she hangs her head, still refusing to look at Erin, who sighs.

“I asked you to.”

“Stop.”

“Holtzmann, come on. What are you even doing, staring out of the window?” 

“I’m waiting for the sun to come up.”

“That’s not funny.”

“I’m not kidding.” Erin freezes, eyes growing wide as Holtzmann grips the edge of the window tightly, a sigh escaping her as she looks up at the horizon, which is beginning to turn light blue.

“Holtzmann, get away from the window.”

“No. I don’t-I can’t-I...” She growls in frustration, and Erin pushes forward, but Holtzmann steps away from her. 

“I said stay away from me.”

“Holtzmann, I’m fine. What are you freaking out about?”

“This isn’t even you talking, Erin! It’s the addiction!” Holtzmann exclaims. Erin chuckles under her breath, shaking her head in disbelief.

“I’m not addicted, Holtz.”

“Oh yeah? What do you want right now? More than anything?” Erin smiles.

“For you to talk to me.” 

“No, you want me to bite you.”

“No I don’t.” Erin lies hastily.

“I bit you, I...fuck, what did I do, what did I do...” Holtzmann’s crying now, fresh tears leaking down her face and Erin finally rushes forward and grips her shoulders.  
“Holtzmann, stop! I’m fine, there’s nothing to freak out about!”

“What if our roles were reversed? What if you were the monster and you bit me?” 

“Holtzmann, you’re feeling better now because you have blood in you and I gave you that. I’m happy-.”

“Stop, just...stop.” She pushes Erin away lightly, sitting her down on the bed as she walks toward the window again, and Erin reaches out to grab her.

“Holtzmann, the sun is rising, get away from the window.” Holtzmann doesn’t respond. Panic begins to really build in Erin now as Holtzmann sighs and looks back at her.

“Get back to New York. Tell the others I’m sorry.” 

The sun just breaks over the horizon when Erin runs up and drags Holtzmann down into the shade beneath the window, pinning her body on top of Holtzmann’s, and she’s beating her fists on Holtzmann’s chest angrily, fury flooding through her.

“Stop being so fucking selfish! Why can’t you realize that I don’t care, that I wanted you to bite me, dammit!” She shouts between pounding her fists against Holtzmann’s body.

“And I did it! I bit you, Erin! I hurt you!”

“I wasn’t in any pain!” Erin shouts, looking Holtzmann in the eyes now, and she rolls them over so she’s on top of Erin now, pinning her down by her shoulders.

“Stop!”

“If you die, if you do this, what am I supposed to do?” Erin’s eyes begin watering now, and Holtzmann laughs mirthlessly.

“Live a better life! Survive!” Holtzmann goes to stand. Erin hooks her arms under and around Holtzmann’s shoulders and drags her down until their faces are inches apart.

“I’m not living without you, do you hear me? You’re my best friend, and I don’t fucking care that you’re a monster, or that you bit me or-.”

“You’re only saying that because you want me around to bite you-.”

She silences her by throwing herself up, lips slamming against Holtzmann’s passionately as Holtzmann groans against her, deepening the kiss as her hands trail up and under Erin’s shirt, goosebumps erupting on Erin’s skin as she gasps against Holtzmann-

“Stop.” Holtzmann pulls away, the word coming out choked as Erin whines from the loss of Holtzmann’s lips on hers.

“Stop-.”

“I can’t. Holtzmann, think about it, god...I looked all over the damn city for you when you disappeared, I came with you to the Club, I came with you to Mexico, the signs are all there, why are you so blind?” Holtzmann bites down on her lower lip.

“Erin, don’t say it, please.”

“I threw myself into danger because I couldn’t bear the thought of you doing this on your own, because I-.”

“Erin, please-.”

“I love you. I love you as a friend, I...fuck, I love you as something more, maybe, all I know is that I love you and I care about you, Holtz, please-.” 

Holtzmann’s the one to silence her now, lips pressing against Erin’s gently as Erin sobs against her, arms pulling her as close as possible to her body. She pulls away, lips brushing against Erin’s gently before she moves them toward her cheek, down to her jaw...

“How’s your neck?” Holtzmann breathes against her skin. Erin’s breath hitches and Holtzmann sighs.

“Don’t. It’s never happening again.”

“Why not?”

“Erin-.”

“Holtzmann, you’ve proven you can do it without killing me. Just small amounts every once in a while, it stops you from hurting anyone else-.”

“Erin, don’t you see what it’s doing to you?” Holtzmann whispers, wincing. Erin leans in, kissing Holtzmann and nipping at her lower lip, a smile escaping her at Holtzmann’s low whine.

“You know it’s a good idea.”

“It’s not. It’s the worst idea I’ve ever heard.” Holtzmann pushes herself up off of Erin, but keeps herself hovering above her, arms holding herself up as if she’s doing a push up as Erin rolls her eyes.

“There’s literally no downside to this. You get blood-.”

“You get high. Great.” Holtzmann goes to stand, Erin drags her down.

“Fine. It won’t happen again. I won’t pester you, either. But promise me something. You won’t try to fucking kill yourself anymore. I forgive you, and I’ll...I’ll stop asking you to bite me, just...stay alive. For me. Please?” Holtzmann sighs, but eventually nods.

“Okay.” She whispers. Erin slides herself out from under Holtzmann and reaches for the blinds, shutting the light out from the room and Holtzmann finally stands, sighing again as Erin wraps her arms around Holtzmann’s neck, burying her head into her shoulder. Holtzmann wraps her arms around her waist gently, before they move up to brush Erin’s hair back from her neck. She winces at the sight of Erin’s neck.

“Does it hurt?” She whispers.

“Not really.” Erin lies. Her cold fingers brush against the swollen and raised skin, and she bites down her lip as she blinks back tears, looking up at Erin guiltily.

“What are we doing here, Erin?” She asks gently.

“What do you mean?”

“What are we? What is this?” She asks. Erin sighs and rests her forehead against Holtzmann’s gently, fingers tangling in her hair, marveling at how It looks waving down past her shoulders, her mind still so used to her usual up-do.

“I don’t know what we are, Holtzmann. I just know that I need you in my life. And I’ll do anything to make sure you stay in it.” Holtzmann nods against her.

“I can’t hurt you again, Erin-.”

“I know. No more biting, I promise. I’ll...I’ll get over this.” Erin says, trying her best not to express her disbelief and guilt at lying, and Holtzmann grips her hand, interlacing their fingers.

“Good.” 

“I’ll bring the car around. You run down as fast as you can so you don’t get burned.”

“Mmm...”

“Promise me.”

“Promise you what?”

“You’ll run as fast as you can so you don’t get burned.”

“Promise.”

“Good.” Erin smiles and presses a gentle kiss to Holtzmann’s forehead before pulling away and grabbing the two suitcases. 

As she steps outside into the warm sunlight, she smiles, happy with how their conversation has gone.

Her smile only wavers when she remembers her promise.

And how she plans on breaking it.

Holtzmann will have to give in eventually.

*************************************************

They’ve reached Charlotte, North Carolina when the sun sets and Erin decides it’s time to rest for the night. They get a room at the nearest Motel and Erin shakes her head as Holtzmann goes to grab their suitcases.

“No point. We’re only staying to get some rest. Well, I am.” Holtzmann simply nods, and Erin can’t help the pang of hope that hits her heart at the sight of Holtzmann clenching her jaw, her skin pale and her eyes dark as the lack of blood starts to get to her. 

She knows she should be disgusted. She shouldn’t be happy at the sight of the woman she loves in pain.

But the thought of it...the thought of that euphoria flooding her again...

“Holtz-.”

“I’m fine. Let’s just get a room so you can get some sleep.” She doesn’t bother to argue, knowing she’ll get nowhere with the argument as they do their usual routine of going to the Lobby and booking a room.

They enter their room, only one bed in the middle and Erin flops down onto it with a sigh as Holtzmann sits on the corner of the bed and watches Erin for a few minutes. Erin can feel Holtzmann’s eyes on her, and she shifts in the bed to look at her.

Her look is longing, the lust and hunger in her eyes burning so deeply, and Erin can see her pupils are almost slits...

She swallows the lump in her throat.

“Holtzmann...you need it.” Holtzmann closes her eyes, letting out the breath she’s holding as she shakes her head.

“No.”

“Why?”

“You know why.” Erin bites down on her lip.

“Say it.”

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

“Because then I’ll feel...and if I feel then I’ll want...I’ll want to bite...” She trails off, swallowing thickly.

Erin sits up and grabs Holtzmann’s shoulder, pulling her further onto the bed. She straddles Holtzmann’s lap, pushing her down onto the bed as Holtzmann whines.

“Say it.” Erin says firmly. Holtzmann flips them over, Erin now laying on the bed as Holtzmann hovers above her.

“Don’t.” Erin grips the back of Holtzmann’s neck tightly.

“Say it.” She says through gritted teeth. Holtzmann groans as Erin’s fingers trail under her shirt and reach the wiring of her bra, thumb brushing underneath the bra and Holtzmann grits her teeth before looking down at Erin.

“You said you were gonna try to get over this.”

“Promises were made to be broken.”

“Fucking hell, Erin-.”

“You need blood.” 

She needs it, she needs it, she needs it-

“You’re destroying me.” Holtzmann whispers. Erin ignores it. 

“Say it.” Erin repeats. She needs it, she needs it, god she fucking needs it-

“I love you.” Her eyes glow gold, her teeth grow, Erin pulls her down-

Previously unmarked flesh flares as the sharp tips of Holtzmann’s teeth dig into the unmarked side of Erin’s neck, crimson flowing as Erin cries out before she whines at the pleasure that floods her, her body relaxing down onto the bed as the world turns foggy around her...

Holtzmann pulls away after a while, and Erin can faintly hear her crying before she fades completely, only one thing running through her mind...

_The things we love destroy us the most._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> JUST KNOW I'M VIRTUALLY HUGGING ALL OF YOU. I'M SORRY FOR PUTTING YOU THROUGH THIS. ALSO IT'S PROBABLY GONNA GET WORSE FROM HERE.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *britney spears voice* it's been awhile.  
> Sorry for the delay in this guys, christmas and new years and what not. also i'm so so so so so so so sorry.

When Erin wakes, she’s in the car.

 

Her head is pounding, and she groans, lifting her head up off the seat as she looks around the car, notices the greenery flying past her...

“Holtzmann?” She turns, vision slightly blurred and feels a hand grip her wrist.

“Sleep. We’re almost home.” 

“Almost home?” Erin frowns, wincing at the pulsating throb in her head intensifies and finally, her vision begins to clear.

Holtzmann is crying, tears falling down her face as she lets go of Erin and grips the steering wheel.

“Holtzmann?” Erin repeats, her heart breaking at the sight before her as she reaches out, but Holtzmann shrugs away from her, refusing to look at her at all.

“I’m taking us home.” She says hoarsely. 

“O-Okay, but-.”

“When we get home, I’m leaving.” 

Silence fills the car, taking over the entire empty space as Erin feels the corners of her vision begin to darken as her breath becomes ragged.

“L-Leaving?”

“Yes.”

“What-but-.”

“Don’t bother, Erin. I’ve made up my mind and I’m not changing it.” 

She can feel her bottom lip beginning to tremble, can feel her whole body beginning to shake.

“Holtz-.”

“You’re not the only one who’s addicted.” 

The words send a shiver up Erin’s spine, goosebumps erupting on her skin as Erin lets out a shallow breath. Holtzmann’s grip on the steering wheel is so tight, her knuckles are beginning to turn whiter than a sheet of paper.

“Holtz-.”

“No. I’m staying away from you. I’m leaving.” Erin’s heart is pounding in her ears, her stomach twisting and the throbbing she’s feeling throughout her whole body, particularly in a certain sensitive area, causes her to bite down on her bottom lip and let out the tiniest of whimpers as she reaches out and touches Holtzmann’s wrist, closing her fingers around it gently.

“Holtzmann-.”

She pulls over, spinning the wheel almost maniacally as Erin cries out, hands flying out to grip the dashboard to steady herself as Holtzmann suddenly throws the door open and hurls herself out into the sun.

“HOLTZMANN!” Erin can hear her screams of pain as she throws the door open wildly and runs around the car.

Holtzmann is on her knees, skin blistering as she wails and Erin throws open the door to the backseat, grabs Holtzmann by the collar and drags her into the car.  
She resists weakly, groaning as Erin throws her body forward and shuts the door before they both fall down on the backseat, Erin’s arms wrapped around Holtzmann’s body tightly as she cries.

“YOU PROMISED ME YOU WOULDN’T TRY THIS ANYMORE, YOU PROMISED!” Erin screams through her sobs, her entire body shaking as she clutches Holtzmann, who groans, burying her head into Erin’s chest as her skin only blisters even more.

“Why-you’re not healing-.” Erin chokes out. Holtzmann grips Erin’s side and lets out a shaky breath.

“Just let me die.” She whispers hoarsely. 

“Over my dead fucking body.” Erin growls, gripping her tighter.

“Erin...” Holtzmann’s skin still isn’t healing, and Erin shakes her head.

“You need blood.” 

“Let me go.”

“Never.” Erin adjusts herself, laying Holtzmann down in the backseat as she moves herself forward through the gap and enters the driver’s seat, throwing the car into drive and practically speeding back onto the road, wiping the tears from her eyes as Holtzmann groans behind her.

“The sun is almost down, we can get to a Hotel-.”

“Erin, I don’t want to do this anymore...” Holtzmann’s voice is soft, weak, filled with sadness and grief.

Erin ignores her, only pushes down on the accelerator even more. 

***************************

They sit in silence. 

They’ve been on the side of the road since the sun had set over the horizon. Two hours have gone by in complete silence, Holtzmann’s groans turning into soft whimpers as she healed, Erin simply sitting there, observing, craving, dying slowly...

What have they become?

“We’re a time-bomb, Erin.” Holtzmann says hoarsely. Erin purses her lips, lets her tears fall, grips the steering wheel...

“We can’t go on like this.” Holtzmann whispers. Erin still doesn’t respond. 

“Erin?”

 

“We have to find a cure.”

“There isn’t one.”

“We’ll think of something.”

“Erin-.”

“We’re not doing this, Holtzmann. We’re not talking about you dying or-or giving up-.”

“I can’t bite you again. I can’t...” She’s crying, the words cracking and fading and Erin hears her crying, pushes down the selfishness crawling into her throat, begs herself to consider how Holtzmann is feeling, but all she wants is that bite-

“I can’t stop thinking about it.” Erin whispers. Holtzmann lets out a choked sob.

“Neither can I.” She manages. 

Silence fills the car again. 

Erin lays back against the seat.

“We’re not far from home.” She says.

“What do we even tell them?”

“I have no idea.”

“Abby is gonna kill me.”

“They don’t have to know.”

“Your neck is evidence enough, Erin.” 

“Then I’ll cover it with my hair.”

“And what? This will be a dirty secret? A disgusting, horrifying-.”

“Holtzmann, stop.” 

Silence again.

“How are you feeling?” Erin breathes.

“Like shit.”

“Do you need b-.”

“Don’t.”

“Holtz-.”

“Erin, please, I am begging you.” The desperation in her voice is so heartbreaking, Erin bites down on her tongue, blinks away her tears and doesn’t respond. 

“We need to learn more, at least. There has to be something we can do, Holtzmann.” 

“Erin, I’m a vampire. There’s no cure, there’s no fix, there’s just...blood. It’s all I can think of, it’s all I need to survive, I don’t eat, I can’t sleep, I’m just this...this thing, that kills and hurts and this...” She lets out a long breath.

“I’m not me anymore. I’m not Jillian Holtzmann, she...she died a long time ago. There’s just nothing but this. I don’t see a light at the tunnel anymore, I don’t see hope I just see this. And I don’t like this, I hate this, I despise this-.”

“It’s what you are now, Holtz.”

“Then I hate myself. I hate me, and I don’t want to be this anymore. Erin, just...try to understand.” Holtzmann sits up now, hand reaching out and gripping Erin’s shoulder. She looks into the mirror, ignores the blistering skin on Holtzmann’s face and looks into her eyes.

The one thing that’s stayed the same...

“If you were like this...if you were a monster like me...if you were hurting me, biting me...how would you feel?” 

She doesn’t want to say it, doesn’t want it to be this way...

“I’d want to die. I’d never want to hurt you.” Erin barely manages to get it out before she begins sobbing loudly, chest heaving, heart pounding, body aching-

“Please, Erin...let me go.” 

Her stomach turns, her heart aching, she throws the door open, hurls over the side of the road, hears Holtzmann crying behind her...

She rests her head against the steering wheel as she shuts the door, cries hard, unable to stop herself, wrapping her arms around her body in order to keep herself together-

“I don’t want you-you to live like this-.” Erin chokes out.

“I don’t want to live like this either.” Holtzmann whispers. 

“But I can’t lose you!” She’s breaking, she can feel it, she can’t breathe, she can’t-

“Shhh...” Erin isn’t sure how it happens, but somehow, Holtzmann manages to unbuckle Erin’s seatbelt and pick her up effortlessly, dragging her into the backseat and embracing her. Erin’s fingers are clutching Holtzmann’s shirt, tears falling down her face, blurring her vision, and Holtzmann simply rocks her back and forth, whispering and cooing gently.

She isn’t sure how long they stay like this for. 

She hears Holtzmann whisper “I love you”. She whispers it back.

Holtzmann brushes her hair back from her face, presses her lips against Erin’s temple.

Erin’s fingers dig into Holtzmann’s skin under her shirt. Holtzmann’s breath hitches.

“Can we at least go home?” Erin manages. Holtzmann lets out a shaky breath.

“Yeah. I’m not leaving this Earth without saying bye to Patty and Abby.” 

**************************

It feels like death is clinging to the air around them.

Erin’s busted Ghosts a million times over. 

Never in her life has she felt grief this heavy before.

It’s indescribable. It’s beyond painful, beyond hurtful, beyond excruciating.

It’s numbing, almost, but not enough.

Abby is staring blankly at the wall ahead of them, eyes glassed over as tears fall down her face. Patty is crying openly, gripping Holtzmann’s hand tightly.

Holtzmann is silent, face grim, but ready.

They reached New York at two in the morning.

Abby and Patty were waiting for them, Erin texting them both to tell them they were almost home.

Holtzmann told them everything, except for her and Erin and the biting, and the addiction they were both struggling to let go of.

A secret, it appears, they both will keep, as Erin had covered her neck with her hair from the moment they stepped back into the Firehouse.

“There ain’t nothing we can do?” Patty croaks out. Holtzmann smiles sadly.

“I wish there was, Pattycakes.”

“Don’t go callin’ me that, I can’t...” She purses her lips, lets out a choked sob. Erin shuts her eyes, wanting this all to end, to go away-

“It’s almost time.” Holtzmann whispers. Erin notices the sky outside beginning to turn light blue.

“I can’t do this.” Abby pushes her chair back, shaking her head, face stark white as she reaches the stairs and climbs them, not looking back, not talking, barely breathing-

They don’t bother to call her back. This is how Abby copes. They all know that.

“Erin...” She turns to look at her, blue eyes clashing with blue as Holtzmann smiles and reaches out to grip her hand.

“Will you be there with me?” She asks gently.

“You want me to watch you die?” She asks numbly.

“I want you to be the last thing I see.” She says simply.

Erin finds herself nodding.

“I love you, baby.” Patty embraces Holtzmann tightly, crying openly as Holtzmann grips her back as if she never wants to let go.

But she does.

She leans up onto the tips of her toes, pressing a kiss to Patty’s forehead before she reaches out to grip Erin’s hand. They make their way up the stairs to the rooftop, come across Abby, who tries to stop herself from crying.

She fails.

Holtzmann doesn’t hug her.

She just touches her cheek, leans in, kisses her forehead, whispers ‘thank you’, grips Erin’s hand, steps forward and up...

Erin follows her numbly, unable to move, unable to think-

Holtzmann pushes the door open. 

She helps Erin sit on the ledge of the rooftop, Erin’s back hitting the brick wall behind them as Holtzmann settles down in her lap, back against her chest.

She breathes in deeply, relaxes against Erin, who brushes her hair back and presses her lips to Holtzmann’s hair.

“Erin?” She doesn’t have to say it. 

“I know.” Holtzmann chuckles, grips Erin’s wrist, pulls her hand down and presses a kiss to her palm.

“Holtzmann?” 

She doesn’t have to say it.

“I know.” Holtzmann whispers. 

Erin blinks back tears.

The sun rises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I SAID I'M SORRY DO NOT HURT ME.  
> I LOVE YOU?


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT KILL ME!

**Four Months Later**

“You sure about this?”

She takes a drag from the cigarette between her fingertips, inhales before exhaling and watching the smoke curl up toward the sky before smiling wryly.

“Every time I see you, you ask me that.” 

“Maybe because I think you’re crazy to keep buying this shit off me. It’s not like it’s easy to come by.” 

“I tried manufacturing my own, it didn’t have the same effect.” Peter rolls his eyes, shrugs before nodding.

“Alright.” He pulls out the bag from his inside pocket, looks around before he hands it to her. The excitement that pounds through her veins sends her heart into frenzy as she grabs the bag off him and hands him a wad of money. 

“There’s enough in there for a week at least. I think you should use it sparingly. She told me she’s not doing this shit for me anymore, and finding another Vampire in this town is gonna be hard, especially one willing to do this.” 

‘Thanks, Peter.”

“Yeah, you’re welcome, Erin. Just...look after yourself, yeah?” 

She throws the cigarette to the ground and simply nods before crossing the street and heading towards her apartment, checking vigilantly for cops or snitches. 

“Erin.” She freezes, heart dropping, mind racing.

_No, no, no, no, it can’t be..._

She turns.

It’s not.

She exhales in relief, watches as Abby makes her way toward her former best friend with tears falling down her face, eyes trailing down to the bag in her hand before moving back up.

“Erin, what are you doing?” She sniffs and shrugs.

“What I need to do.” 

“Erin, this isn’t you.” 

“It’s me now, Abby. Is there a reason you’re here?” She needs to get to her apartment. Now. Now, now, now-

“She wouldn’t want you to do this and you know it-.”

Her arm flies out. Rests flat against Abby’s throat. Hand grips her shoulder, throws her back into the wall.

Gentle, but not pleasant.

Abby flinches. Swallows. Doesn’t stop staring. 

She lets her go.

“I have to be somewhere.”

“I found something at the firehouse.” 

“I don’t want it.”

“She’d want you to-.”

“Shut up!” Her fist flies out, smacks against the brick wall beside Abby’s head. Her knuckles immediately begin throbbing, a discomfort in her third knuckle confirming to her that she’s broken it and Abby lets out a sigh of frustration before grabbing her uninjured hand and shoving a box into it.

“Open it.” Her voice is demanding. She decides to follow it. Opens the box.

A metal U with a screw through the middle of it, a ring forming around both of them.

“I found it with a note.” 

She’s shaking, wants to get home, let her go home...

“I have to go.”

“It’s in the box, too, Erin, please read it-.” She walks away, almost runs as far as she can away from Abby, away from the pain, her lungs burning, her legs pushing despite having nothing left to give.

She dashes up the stairs to her apartment and shuts the door behind her, sweat pouring down her face as she breathes heavily.

The box is in her shaking hand still. 

Beneath the metal U is a note, folded multiple times haphazardly.

She takes it out, unfolds it slowly, gently...

Her fingertips glide over the words, glide over the paper where she knows Holtzmann’s hand must’ve rested as she wrote this...

_Erin,_

_I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for everything. I wish I had better words, better thoughts to give you, but all I can think or say is I’m sorry. I didn’t want everything to end this way. Never in my wildest dreams did I think things would end this way..._

_I’ve never wanted anything more than you. I’ve never wanted anything more than for this whole thing to be a nightmare and for us to be alright. For me to be that scientist and that engineer that drove you crazy with frustration, who flirted with you endlessly, but who made you smile and laugh, who filled your days with happiness and adventure. I never dreamed I would become the girl who made you cry, who made you suffer, who hurt you._

_And because of that, I can’t keep going on. There is no cure. If I don’t hurt you, I hurt someone else. This hunger inside of me has taken over and there’s nothing either of us can do about it._

_It’s over, Erin._

_I wish there was another way. But never forget and never stop believing that I love you with everything in me. And please...don’t remember me as this. As a Vampire who hurt innocent people. Remember me as the Engineer who joked endlessly and always made you laugh. Remember me as that brilliant scientist who always had your back with her inventions. Remember me for my crazy glasses and those crop tops that you always hated but secretly loved._

_Stick with Abby and Patty. Let them bring you back to the light. I’ll be there waiting for you, too._

_I love you._

She isn’t sure how long she stays curled up on her side on the floor, reading the words over and over, fingers brushing over the ink with delicacy as she whispers them under her breath, lips curling into a smile when she reaches the last sentence every time. 

The sun is beginning to rise when her hand drops and lands on top of the bag beside her, filled with her favorite drug.

Vampire venom.

She doesn’t give it a second thought.

She grabs the bag, goes to the bathroom, disposes the needles inside and flushes it. She reaches into her pocket with shaking hands and pulls out her phone. 

Abby barely lets it ring before she answers.

“Erin?”

“Come pick me up. Take me home. Please.” 

“I’m on my way, stay put!” Her hand grips the letter tightly, goes back to the box.

She reaches for the necklace before staring at it for what feels like a lifetime. She hooks it around her neck and clasps it shut just as there’s a knock on the door.

“Erin?”

She opens it.

Abby stares, tears in her eyes.

“You read it.”

“I read it.” 

Abby doesn’t say or do anything. Just waits.

Erin doesn’t break down. Erin doesn’t cry. 

She squares her shoulders. She smiles.

“What do you say? Ready to turn this dusk into dawn?” 

Abby stares in confusion, doesn’t understand.

Erin does.

She’ll never forget.

She looks up at the ceiling, positive that if Holtzmann is around, ghost or no ghost, she can hear her.

“I love you, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BEFORE YOU COME AT ME WITH PITCHFORKS LEMME EXPLAIN. This is truly the only way I saw this fic ending. Personally, I think someone as pure as Holtzmann wouldn't be able to live with the what she did and the people she'd hurt whether she was cured or not, and I DID WARN YOU IT WAS GOING TO BE DARK SO YOU CAN'T BE MAD.
> 
> I AM SORRY THOUGH.
> 
> PLEASE LOVE ME. AND MY HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE CHOICES IN LIFE. IT GOT A SEMI-HAPPY ENDING THOUGH!
> 
> I HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOYED THIS FIC DESPITE THE TORTURE THOUGH!


End file.
